Daily posts of baby on FB

[shebird]

A family member had a baby 6 months ago. Since the day baby was born she posts at least 3 photos and sometimes videos of baby together with updates on baby's weight, sleep and how much she's has expressed I thought this might have dwindled out as baby got older but it's not looking likely.

I'm aware that I can hide her posts and I am not having a moan about how annoying I find FB. My concern is for the child's privacy. We are not talking the odd cute photo here, pretty much all of this child's life to date has been documented on FB. Do children not have a right to have everything shared online or AIBU?

Obviously, the City isn't looking for incorruptible people with a clean history, it's looking for people who know how to cover up what they are really up to - and we are all supposed to aspire to that for our children. To have pictures of yourself as a baby on the internet is to advertise to the world that you are honest and have nothing to hide, two attributes that are, apparently, not desirable in the square mile.

Rabbit I have to agree with you there.

And that's what you want your children to have access to. If my child wants to be a lying, conniving cheat, I'm afraid he'll have to do it by himself. I will merely bring him up to be aware of the importance of keeping some personal data secure and being circumspect about anything else he shares (despite the fact that the security of ALL young people was massively compromised by an idiot government employee who saw fit to send unencrypted data in the normal post and lose it...).

No, we are supposed to aspire that our children be free to do as they please, without hindrance or compromise our parenting. I would hope my children educate themselves and choose their own path in life, and I would hope DD does not see a world where her gender limits her ambition. I can only show my children the moral corruption in the world, and I can only explain to them how and why it exists. I would trust that they would decide it is not for them, but there are ways of honest people making money in the City. Maybe not real money, but a goodly amount of money nonetheless. From what I have seen of it, it has a habit of corrupting the weak minded. It is oppressive in that way. The 'failure' rate is incredibly high, but a lot of those who leave leave because their morals clash with what they are being asked to do.

I remember introducing a girl who really wanted to get into corporate insurance sales. She had a real enthusiasm, and the personality for it. So I introduced her to someone who was very successful at what she wished to do. Not an interview. Just friends having dinner one evening. During the course of the evening she realised my other friend had no scruples at all about what she might do to land a client for her bank. Afterwards my friend said there is no way she would ever do anything immoral to land a contract, and said surely there are plenty of people who don't sleep with guys just to win a contract. I told her of course there were, but I introduced her to this Fronde, because she needed to know that people like that existed. And that she would be competing with people like that. It is not a level playing field when your competition has a different moral code to you. Not in business. Be that interviews, be that journalism, be that the city. Yes, London is a much more focused world of excesses, but these practices run throughout big business life in the UK. Wherever there is a lot of money, there is a lower moral code, and a ribbon of corruption.

I still don't think details of a baby's sleep pattern are a matter of great security concern. If the baby's full name, date and time of birth, hospital of birth, home address, mother's maiden name, passport number, etc, have also been revealed through various posts, then yes, that is a security risk. But not how much it eats, sleeps, weighs and poos in the first six months of its life.

And that's what you want your children to have access to. If my child wants to be a lying, conniving cheat, I'm afraid he'll have to do it by himself.

No, that is what I want my children to recognise and understand. I do not wish to wrap my children in cotton wool and tell them the world is nice and pretty and full of honest hard working people (which I'm sure the majority of us are). I need my children to understand how the world actually works, for real, not what we are shown on the telly, because my parents never taught me about the real world. They taught me what they had been taught by their parents, and they had never questioned it. Admittedly, in those days they didn't have the freedom the internet provides to look for answers, they only had what 'journalists' told them in newspapers and on the nightly news on TV, so I guess they were mentally neutered to begin with. But I don't want my children to be so compromised. I look at students today, and some of those in their late twenties, and they are eminently more capable than my generation was straight out of the box. But the system has yet to accommodate them. They are only beginning to realise that they need to make it their own.

I will merely bring him up to be aware of the importance of keeping some personal data secure and being circumspect about anything else he shares (despite the fact that the security of ALL young people was massively compromised by an idiot government employee who saw fit to send unencrypted data in the normal post and lose it...).

A very good thing.

I still don't think details of a baby's sleep pattern are a matter of great security concern.

Not in and of itself, no, but OP eluded to a more enthusiastic litany of posts.

If the baby's full name, date and time of birth, hospital of birth

Given the description given, I wouldn't be surprised to find this information online.

home address, mother's maiden name

And these two are easy once you know your targets name, online contacts and hospital of birth.

... have also been revealed through various posts, then yes, that is a security risk.

But not how much it eats, sleeps, weighs and poos in the first six months of its life.

Unfortunately people tend not to limit their posts to what baby does. Baby has a name. Baby has a hospital visit. Baby has a granny. Baby if three months old today, etc. This is useable information if it is posted online.

I totally get the views on the negative side of social media, although I don't necessarily agree with them all

Call me stupid (and I am sure a few posters will) but I see putting pics (however regular or not) on FB are a good memory, something for the child to look back on later on in life? Okay maybe some keep hard copies of pics but in the digital day and age, we rarely do. I know my DD now 11 can't remember her very first party so loves to look back at photos, and indeed loves to read my status updates over the years. If she were ever to be embarrassed or beg me not to post something of course I would not. If she does not get a job because somebody googled me/her and they saw a status update about her behaving like a brat for a week, then decided not to employ, well she nor I would want her working for them! I'm sure she would may have a go me too which I would have to accept. But that is for me to deal with nobody else.

I do agree that screening for some jobs is necessary. If you are going to work for say a high end posh type of company and all your weekend photos are about getting pissed and kissing random people, I could understand.

HOWEVER, unless you breach any kind of confidentiality, what you do in your spare time is up to you, as long as it does not affect your job.

Just my view.

What you are describing in the way you bring up your children is the condoning of corrupt behaviour, by acceptance and turning a blind eye. There isn't a ribbon of corruption running through these organisations - it's all corrupt because of the tacit acceptance of the corruption. Everyone knows it goes on, but to make their own "honest" living, they have to live off the back of it without rocking the boat. You don't want your children to be the victims of it, you would rather they joined it is what you are saying.

(Talking to Ellie btw).

Ellie.
Are you assuming still that everyone you are posting to has no history or association with the square mile?

And we are all working 9-5 dreaming of better things?

I wish I could break free from this mop and bucket!

(I do work in the city. And recruit.)

Properly laughing at people sleeping with aged men to get a corporate insurance contract.

I have to go tell DH.
Actually I have about 30 friends to send this thread to..

I used to work in the City... I have to say, I did see some things I didn't like, and met a few arrogant tossers, but not to the extent I would bring my children up to accept that corruption and arrogance are inevitable if you want to lead a happy and successful life.

I know ilovecrapcrafts

This is like city life if it was organised by the daily mail and martina Cole

Isn't it?

And everyone in the world should live their life as though they will end up there! Not the 1 in a million who do (or the 1 in 62m who will sleep
With someone to flog insurance. WEEP)

But yes, Ilovecrapcrafts - anyone who is not grooming their child for life in the City, which apparently involves keeping all details of their lives a secret, is stunting their future.

In fact, they are condemning their children to a life working on the Walmart shop floor.

Well DH went through experian, they asked him to confirm all his previous addresses and the dates he was there, this tallied with his legitimate financial paper trail (bills, banks, cards etc). When they were satisfied the 2 dodgy ones weren't his they took it up with Vodafone and the catalogue company. The catalogue debt had a different DOB than DH and they agreed to stop chasing DH. No idea what is happening with Vodafone but I think they are looking at the paperwork. He had to report it to action fraud and that got the debt collector off his back.

Agree I hate contactless and PIN I don't think is as good as signature, but I guess they need to speed up the ways to get you to spend money so you don't think twice.

rabbitstew In response to your question, the person I'm referring to in my OP has always been a prolific poster on FB, even pre baby. This is why I am concerned that the daily posts will continue as the child grows up and it will then be more than just a few baby photos.

I'm still massively struggling to understand the connection between careers in the city (which seem to involve sleeping with clients) and baby photos.

I work in the city. I've progressed reasonably well up the career ladder. My baby photos have not featured - And I've never so much as snogged someone to get ahead.

Am I doing it wrong?

I think Ellie's posting from some parallel universe

Maybe people who post regularly on FB are lonely or need affirmation in some way. Even more reason to stop and think, why am I sharing this? Does someone I went to school with and haven't seen for 20 years really need to know my child has a rash?

shebird whilst I can understand your concerns, ultimately it isn't really any of your business ? I mean that in nicest way. Unless your concern is over welfare of child, pics showing abuse or neglect, in which case I get that but that would be for social services.

At end of day if that is what she wants to do, leave her to it. Any repercussions later on life I'm sure she will accept responsibility for, as we all would.

Not everybody posts on FB regularly and for those that don't it is probably hard to understand BUT each to his own. It is her choice nobody elses and she should not be picked on for her choices. There is an unfollow button.

shebird ypu obviously do not like or use FB. That is your choice, it is nobodys business.

However I think it is a little off to assume those that use it are doing it for emotional reasons i.e. We are lonely, sad or whatever? Think that is a ridiculous assumption tbh. Yes I am sure there are people on there like that but equally there are people who use it for fun and to connect with old friends or family around the world.

No perhaps your friends don't need to know if your DC have a rash or whatever, but they, like you, are free to press the unfollow, unfriend button. You don't have to share anything you don't want to, if at all. This woman chooses to share, that is her choice.