To want to drop kick that kid out of a window?!

[IReallyHateThatKid]

I know I'll probably get flamed for this, but here goes nought...

I live in a 3-storey block of flats- 2 per floor- and (at present) we are the only ones without DC. The building is constructed in such a way that we hear noise from the flats above and below us. My downstairs neighbour has 3 dc and a dog, and another on the way, and while generally her kids are quiet at night I am woken by their noise every weekend morning.

Today's rant, however, is about the fucking devil's spawn child belonging to the neighbour who lives above me. It seems she's going through the terrible twos (or it might be threes), and wants to sleep in Mummy's bed with her at night, and screams bloody murder if she can't. Apparently my neighbour used to capitulate and let her DD get in bed with her; however it seems her new tactic is to just let the kid fucking scream. For hours. In the middle of the night. Every night.

The problem is, because the sound carries through the floor, I am woken- and kept awake- by this delightful child's screams. I work unsociable shifts as a nurse because all the daytime shifts get given to my colleagues with kids so I have to get up at 3:30 in the morning most days, and even now, as I type, I am listening to that child screaming, feeling my blood pressure rise, knowing that even if/when she stops I'll be too stressed to go back to sleep, and I'll go to work utterly exhausted. My neighbour works part time (afternoons only) and her Mum takes the kid to nursery every day so she can catch up on her sleep in the mornings. I don't have that luxury. This has been going on for weeks now, to the point where I'm frequently in tears myself. It's no good trying to get an early night to compensate as there is a play area outside the building, where yet more kids make yet more noise until about 9 p.m.

I've tried speaking to my neighbour about it- I'm not some unsympathetic child hater (although this child is sending me further in that direction every day) I'm planning on having my own DC eventually when I have a house and soundproofed walls, I really do understand that it isn't easy for her and- like she says - her DD needs to learn that she can't just have her way- but AIBU to think that it's a little unfair that she's just letting the kid scream and keep me her neighbours awake? I've tried using earplugs, but they pop out of my ears and I worry about sleeping through my alarm.

Tell you what, there's no contraceptive as effective as other people's children!

i second the speaking to her again emphasizing the lack of sleep and it's impact on your working life. if nothing changes then i'd make sure the music was on loud enough to keep her awake during her 'sleep catch up' time....she'll soon do something about the screaming!

So given the fact they live in flats, why on earth would anything think attempting sleep training (and failing) for this length of time is any way inappropriate

Because it's disturbing neighbours every night for weeks on end! It's inappropriate to ignore your screaming child every night when you live in a flat and people are being woken by it. You can't pretend neighbours don't exist just because it suits you. Why should they have to put up with weeks of sleep deprivation and nuisance noise?
A few nights of it is tolerable. And occasional screaming tantrums are part of living in flats. But letting a child scream night after night for weeks is selfish and inconsiderate. They need to find a better sleep-training strategy or comfort the child, not ignore her.

I've lived in many flats and only had a problem once with a noisy child. Many flats and new-builds have excellent soundproofing and most people are considerate. We currently live in a large new-build flat with neighbours below and neighbours on one side, they all have children but we rarely hear anything at all. It's much quieter than when we lived in a semi!

Stick scrunched up tissue in your ears or noise cancelling headphones with some soothing music?

Haven't read the full thread, but has anyone suggested ear plugs? I use them at festivals and always sleep well except when drunks fall onto my tent.

YANBU

YANBU. For a few days or a week while the child's sleep is "fixed" fine but this isn't working and the parents need to take a different approach that doesn't involve their child screaming or hours every night.

The funny thing about those telling you it is just a fact of life in flats, is if the neighbour posted on here:

"my dd has got used to sleeping in my bed so I decided to get her back in her own bed using the cry it out method. It is now 4 weeks later and she screams every night for at least 2-3 hours but I just ignore. AIBU?"

She'd probably be called the worst mother in the world.

YABU move.

Hope she listens Op it must be a bloody nightmare. You need your rest for your job also.

Yanbu at all

Okay - best earplugs ever are the Boots' soft silicone ones. Changed my life. They don't fall out because you don't poke them in, you mould them to the outer ear, forming a seal. Result - silence!
I agree the mother shouldn't be letti g her child scream for hours on end, but if she's that ignorant she's unlikely to change tactics at your request, or care about anyone else's quality of sleep.