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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be sad that so many people seem to be moving away

19 replies

CruCru · 13/07/2015 17:13

We live fairly centrally in London and over the years lots of our friends have moved away. I know it's inevitable as few people can afford a big enough house to accommodate 2+ children where we live. We do still see them but much less often.

Yesterday I found out that two couples we've become friendly with over the last couple of years are moving - one to the outskirts and the other overseas.

AIBU to be sad that our social circle seems to be shrinking so fast?

OP posts:

Spero · 13/07/2015 17:17

Well of course you are not unreasonable. Its very sad. I had to leave London because I couldn't afford it, but frankly travelling from South London to North London to meet up with friends was so much of a hassle I probably see them more now I have moved!

If you can afford to live in Central London then you are usually either an oligarch or you have inherited a family home. So I imagine social circles are going to be quite small if you are neither of those groups.

Levismum · 13/07/2015 17:19

I grew up & still live in London. All my family have moved out & all my old friends. It's quite isolating at times but inevitable.

ArgyMargy · 13/07/2015 17:20

YABU to stealth boast about living in central London. Suck it up.

formerbabe · 13/07/2015 17:21

I live in London although not central London...zone 3. I have seen many people move out further into Kent for bigger houses for less money. It's a shame.

I think London will end up very polarised, with very wealthy people and people in social housing and everyone in between the two of these extremes will have left!

bilbodog · 13/07/2015 17:26

it doesn't just happen in London. We moved out over 20 years ago to bring up our kids which was great but now everybody we know has moved again to retire and downsize - or couples have split up and gone in 2 different directions and now we don't have any friends left!

AnulTheMagnificent · 13/07/2015 17:30

It is sad, many of my friends have moved away just as we moved back and the ones that are left don't come to visit because they don't like the idiot I married.

I now find I am living in an area I hate, in a house I detest with no escape.

Original poster

CruCru · 13/07/2015 17:32

We are neither oligarchs nor have we inherited a house. We bought a long time ago.

OP posts:

bakingaddict · 13/07/2015 17:46

I think the issue is size of house and availability of good secondary schools, it's inevitable as kids grow older. You can get a extra bedroom or two by moving to the outer London zones or going to the likes of Kent, Essex or Bedford

Binkybix · 13/07/2015 18:04

I agree. I didn't have many friends here anyway and the few that I've made are moving. Feels a bit lonely.

specialsubject · 13/07/2015 18:20

jealousy is a playground emotion. Don't rise!

Original poster

CruCru · 13/07/2015 18:22

Sorry? Was that to me?

OP posts:

londonrach · 15/07/2015 08:34

Reason we left London. (outskirts) cost of houses. I know the local school had a huge turnaround with children as due to the cost of housing people moved further out when they had a second child.sadly think its todays life in London.strangely I dont miss London now...

AlwaysDancing1234 · 15/07/2015 08:37

I know how hard it is, two of DS and my best friends have recently moved away to buy bigger cheaper houses in the country. I have to say though that we've been looking at moving to the coast recently as we can get aich nicer bigger house for less than half what we pay in rent on the city.

MaggieJoyBlunt · 15/07/2015 08:39

Special Is jealousy just a word you are particularly good at spelling and so you feel obliged to use it frequently?

MaggieJoyBlunt · 15/07/2015 08:43

It's a shame they aren't all fleeing the same direction OP, at least it would be easier to visit them en masse. "Oversea" sounds as though it has holiday possibilities though?

Unfortunately PPs are right, though; It is one of the many things that are happening that are symptomatic of what is happening to lovely old London.

Howcanitbe · 15/07/2015 08:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Spero · 15/07/2015 09:36

The problem for the op I suspect is that 'changing communities' for her does not mean a new influx of like minded people she could be friends with but more oligarchs/absent landlords etc.

'normal' people just can't live in Central London anymore. Her personal sadness reveals a bigger tragedy about what is happening to our capital city. I am a lawyer and there is no way I could afford to go back unless it was to a flat in Penge.

Original poster

CruCru · 15/07/2015 12:26

I think it's partly that people have moved out, we met other "London" friends and got friendly with them over a few months / a year, then they moved out.

It takes time to make new friends and it feels as though many of our "nearby" friends are closer to acquaintances because people come and go so often.

OP posts:

Spero · 15/07/2015 13:22

I am afraid the only solution to that is to move yourselves. I can't see the situation changing in London any time soon. The centre will become a wasteland of multi million pound properties which are bought as investments by foreign entrepreneurs. Many with families will see what £1milliion plus can buy them out of London and will move.

I was utterly horrified and astonished to see what even £750K will get you in London now. Horrible flats in Streatham that I wouldn't pay £75K to live in. The world truly has gone mad.

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