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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel physically sick over this?

9 replies

theblairbitchproject · 12/07/2015 11:10

Ive had a job ive been enjoying for nearly a year. I get on well with my boss; and on occasion ive had to confide in her about my not so fantastic situation at home- not going to go into that here; but long story short- i do live with abusive parents.

I thought we were close. But she has clearly been telling my co workers about my personal shit.

Im gutted at the betrayal if im honest.

OP posts:
TestingTestingWonTooFree · 12/07/2015 11:12

Does she have a boss?

SoundsLegit · 12/07/2015 11:13

Go to HR. There should be confidentiality when disclosing things to your manager. My manager got into a lot of trouble for this recently after disclosing to the rest of the team why certain members of staff were off sick.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 12/07/2015 11:13

Yanbu for being upset. Some people seem to be unable to help themselves when it comes to gossip.

CrystalCove · 12/07/2015 11:14

What level did you speak to her on and was it made clear it was confidential? And have you spoken to her about breaking your confidence?

ephemeralfairy · 12/07/2015 11:15

I am so sorry OP. It must have taken a lot for you to tell her, and to have it thrown back at you like that is so upsetting.

Do you have an HR department? This is quite serious. She is sharing sensitive information that you have told her in confidence.

theblairbitchproject · 12/07/2015 11:20

It was made clear it was confidential. The person she has told (assuming she hasnt told others) doesnt really get on with me either; so im now worried she has ammunition to get to me. I dont want everyone knowing my private business, ffs. And to think ive kept a lot less serious things confidential when she has asked me to.

I dont really want to throw her to the dogs. I do actually care about her.

OP posts:
riverboat1 · 12/07/2015 11:23

Is it a voluntary job - have you posted about this before? Sounds familiar re spilling of personal secrets by boss and living with abusive parents, though maybe it was just another v similar situation I am remembering.

Either way I am sorry this happened to you. Hope things get better.

paulapompom · 12/07/2015 11:26

Sorry for your situation op. It's possible I guess that your boss has not meant to gossip, but has asked other staff to give you some understanding due to you coping with difficult circumstances at home. Still not really ok, but she may have meant well.
Could you have a really honest talk with her and tell her that you only discuss these issues with her, and not with others at work and you feel worried about how colleagues know?Give her a chance to expexplain herself. Flowers

paulapompom · 12/07/2015 11:27

X post with you op

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