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AIBU?

Neighbour noise..

23 replies

Aherdofcows · 11/07/2015 23:15

So...we live in a ground floor flat with a spacious garden in London suburbs.

It's a block of four, so we have one 2 bed flat above us, one beside, and one diagonals above, ie above the aside.

Our upstairs neighbours are generally pleasant people but we hear them going about their business. It drives me to distraction and makes me feel like I am living with a lack of privacy. Tonight they are having a party, it's not outrageous, but I can hear chatter and what music is being played, particularly the base! It's not really reasonable to ask them to turn it down, they don't do it often, and given I have noisy toddlers, they are by comparison to us, the perfect neighbours. I just get irritated.

So. If we bought a house, we would have a massive mortgage and no savings amd unable to have holidays, imwouldmalso be scared by potential interest rate rises. Do i:

Suck it up for now
Move and accept smaller living accommodation in semi detached property
Have CBT as I am the only one in the family that gets annoyed by others noise
Move areas to a cheaper place even though schools may be an issue

My other question is given my need of quiet...does anyone live in semi detached in peace? If so, where what how..

Ideas Gratefully received?

Ta

OP posts:
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OhYouBadBadKitten · 11/07/2015 23:18

I thought it would be better in a semi, but in ours (1960s) Im afraid it isnt. Its horrible isnt it. I really need quiet.

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camtt · 11/07/2015 23:23

after a horrible time with neighbour noise in a flat many years ago (actually not all that out of the way but it upset us a lot) my husband's only criterion for any new house is that it must be detached. I can tell you, this pushes the budget to the limit. However, you need to be able to relax in your home so I would start looking into the various options.

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Katniramal · 11/07/2015 23:24

Noise is crap. Angry

No advice sorry but I can say I live in a semi-detached in peace. The house is about 25 years old and the soundproofing is excellent. Of course noise depends on who your neighbours are but I can count on one hand the number of times they've truly bothered me and I've been here 15 years.

I hope you find a solution.

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Nargles · 11/07/2015 23:26

The irony of reading this whilst listening to my neighbours play banging techno through the wall from my bed is not lost on me.

That said, I used to live in a detached flat and it was overall noises because of poor sound insulation and more street activity / people doing stuff outside at the weekend etc. So it can be swings and roundabouts.

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Nargles · 11/07/2015 23:27

*Overall noisier

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Redglitter · 12/07/2015 00:04

Have you tried speaking to them. They're probably oblivious of the noise. I had a similar problem in my last flat, my neighbour rather handily popped in one day when her partner was playing music and clomping about like a baby elephant. She was absolutely horrified at how the noise travelled

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ILikeCheesee · 12/07/2015 00:16

At least you don't hear stomping around and sqeaky floorboards like I do because the idiot upstairs refuses to wear slippers on carpet

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Pooka · 12/07/2015 00:18

Our semi is Edwardian halls-adjoining. I can almost NEVER hear next door. It's fab.

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cleanmyhouse · 12/07/2015 00:26

Sound proofing?

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PoorNeglectedBike · 12/07/2015 00:27

We live in happy peace in a semi

Savings? Holidays? Meh. We go without but our home life is entirely unaffected by our neighbours

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wibbleywee · 12/07/2015 05:43

I am obsessive about noise and luckily have been able to get detatched houses though have lived in a flat where I was constantly on a knife edge waiting for upstairs to walk to the kitchen! Move house, you need to be able to relax at home, its your sanctuary

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Tangoandcreditcards · 12/07/2015 05:47

I just moved 25 miles out of London from a 2 bed ground floor flat to a 4 bed detached house in the outer suburbs. Same rent.

Neighbour noise is one of the many things I'm mentally trading off against my commute (which I hate).

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MrsItsNoworNotatAll · 12/07/2015 06:56

I hate noise. I sympathise massively. The tossers directly overlooking us are unable to do anything quietly. Everyone within a mile of their house knows when they are going off for the day. Many a Sunday morning lie in has been ruining by these inconsiderate tossers slamming the doors, stomping back and forth to the car and shouting and carrying on with each other. This can go on for well over an hour before they finally fuck the fuck off!!

By then I've given up on getting back to sleep and got up.

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ProudAS · 12/07/2015 07:07

I'm with Clean - soundproofing should be the norm.

Sad fact is some people cannot help making noise and others cannot help being affected by it more than most.

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Teabagbeforemilk · 12/07/2015 07:25

I live in a semi. It's 4 years old and never hear the neighbours. It's amazing!!! It's the first house this has happened in.

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RaptorInaPorkPieHat · 12/07/2015 07:46

Our (end terraced) house is 20 years old and the sound insulation is shocking, right now I can hear next door coughing.

It's OK if you have a quiet neighbour, we did for 15 years, but the current set are loud people. We've grown accustomed to it, but I do know the kids names purely from hearing them being shouted at thru the walls. I have the TV/radio on all day just to a) stop me hearing them and b) stop them hearing me.

I've looked into insulation but as it's a shoe box it would interfere with door frames etc and we would have to do the whole of the party wall to make a difference (4 rooms and a landing).

A detached house is the dream, we're saving up.

P.S. they're up and the telly's on Wink

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BasinHaircut · 12/07/2015 07:58

I think you would be fine in a semi. I grew up in a semi and never one heard anything through the walls. When DH and I bought our first house (a terrace) I was so shocked at hearing next door's phone ringing, TV, sex noises etc but I got used to it.

But I know I could never live in a flat, especially ground floor, as hearing people walking about would drive me insane. I'd be like a PP who said they would be on edge waiting for them to walk to another room.

Now we are in a semi (well, end of terrace) and again I hear almost nothing from next door.

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lagirafe · 12/07/2015 07:58

I hate noise too.

I don't hear anything in the house but in nice weather the neighbours to one side spend most of their time in the garden until 10/11pm and I hate that!
I would never say anything as my children are noisy but it does annoy me.
So even if you get a quiet house you might still have issues in the summer months..... Sounds as if your issues are only occasional so worth taking this into account.

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MisForMumNotMaid · 12/07/2015 08:02

How tied to London are you?

Some years ago I moved West then North. Finding jobs first.

We now live detached. Much quieter than a mid floor flat and we paid less for this (modest detached) house than we sold the mid floor flat.

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Pipbin · 12/07/2015 08:12

We lived in a house where our noisy neighbour was the one over the road!

But I do agree that there is a special kind of noisy that comes from upstairs neighbours.
Although buying your own place will never guarantee you quiet neighbours you can chose houses conducive a quieter life, houses joined at the hallway, for example.

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Meechimoo · 12/07/2015 08:21

You live in London? So I'm guessing you could buy a large detached house in the Home Counties for the cost of your flat? Move!

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Wishful80sMontage · 12/07/2015 08:26

I live in a semi in a very 'naice' road my ndn's dog is a bloody nightmare it will always depend on your neighbours I think not the house/property itself.
My neighbours in old house were fantastic

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butterfly133 · 12/07/2015 11:28

You have my sympathies
I don't think a semi will solve the problem but based on experience, a flat on the top floor will help. Well, it depends on how you feel about garden noise, sometimes noisy neighbour issues come from the garden. Also, I am amazed at what I hear through the walls in my folks semi.

I agree that overhead noise is the worst though. I advise care before investing in soundproofing, it may muffle things but it's still going to let a lot of noise through.

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