...to want to squirt selfish people with a water spray (like you do with naughty cats)

[AlpacaPicnic]

It might be the only way to stop the bad habits!

Squirtee 1 - the woman I worked with yesterday. Two of us in the building all day. I use a spoon to make my cuppa, rinse it under the tap then put it in the drainer. She drops hers in the sink for the fairies to wash up. I counted them this morning. She used 7 spoons yesterday and didn't wash up one!

Squirtee 2 and 3 - the couple who decided to go to the cinema with their children last night, only to bicker with each other through the entire film. We deliberately chose the 9pm showing of Minions so that there would be less chance of children making noise. Their children were pretty well behaved. Parents, not so much.

Anyone to add to the list? My trigger finger is itchy...

People who still think it is OK to use their phones whilst driving.

Whoever gave me this bastard virus that has made me run a temperature all through the heatwave, and now has me coughing convulsively - not a good thing when your pelvic floor has all the strength and elasticity of a wet paper bag.

Dh, for being able to drop off to sleep in seconds, no matter how hot or cold the room is, and no matter if the dses are being noisy (they are 18, 20 and nearly 22 and have the energy to stay up much later than us) or if the lights are on - any light wakes me up. I swear he does it on purpose because he knows I find it difficult to sleep, and he is flaunting his ability to sleep at me.

The twat on the airport courtesy bus today who kept thwacking me with his massive backpack. I ended up practically bent in a v shape, over my baby, also bearing a massive backpack (full of baby food and toys). The bus wasn't that crowded but he boarded at the last minute and stood right next to me. And then turned round abruptly thwack. And then turned back again thwack. And then spun round to have a look the other way twat. And then wanted to have a look out the window to see where we were despite the fact that the bus stop number was announced on a tannoy twonk.

It look all my strength to stay upright and not land on top of the baby in the pushchair. Hand me the supersoaker please.

People who walk out of a shop then immediately stop and have a chat, move away from the doorway!
Same for peole who get off escalators and then stop to wonder where they want to go. Oblivious to everyone piling into each other.