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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

toddlers watching childbirth

66 replies

acatisnotjustforeaster · 01/07/2015 22:35

Aibu to feel a little bad that my 3 year old watched a birth on one born every minute this afternoon? It was accidental, I went to the loo and they have worked out how to change channel. Saw the whole birth bit. Child seemed a bit stunned but facinated and asked to rewind the bit when the baby gets wrapped in a towel. Have I traumatised my child?

OP posts:
NobodyLivesHere · 01/07/2015 22:38

Well my 3 and 2 year olds watched a birth live in their living room and no at 10 and 11 are perfectly untraumtised. Dont worry about it!

MissJoMarch · 01/07/2015 22:38

That's made me chuckle.

I doubt you've traumatised the child for life but you are going to have SO many questions Grin

Lateswim16 · 01/07/2015 22:39

He will be fine but why on earth would anyone watch that anyway?

Birth is a private and special time. WTAF would anyone want the nation to see them in that state.

Beats me.

Lateswim16 · 01/07/2015 22:40

nobody I read that as them seeing a birth at no 10! Grin

Original poster
acatisnotjustforeaster · 01/07/2015 22:41

Phew. I figure it's fine. It's hardly guns and violence eh? I just feel a bit like a step out of innocence I guess.

OP posts:
Maryann1975 · 01/07/2015 22:44

They will be fine. My dc all watched tv births at that age, now they are older I've lost some of my fascination in pregnancy and birth so i don't watch those programmes so often, but I don't see the problem in children of any age watching them if they are interested.

TyneTeas · 01/07/2015 23:01

I did this about forty years ago! (aged about three)

Got up and went downstairs to put on the tv and ended up watching the OU broadcast for student midwives at ridiculous o'clock in the morning Grin

On discovering my Mam just (outwardly at least!) calmly asked me if I had any questions (and was very very relieved when I didn't). Apparantly all I had to say was how beautiful it was Grin

TyneTeas · 01/07/2015 23:02

and totally untraumatised by it!

Mulligrubs · 01/07/2015 23:15

It's fine, they might have questions about it but I am sure they won't be traumatised Smile

cailindana · 02/07/2015 07:25

How do you figure knowing how a baby is born makes a child less 'innocent'? Does knowing about breathing also make them guilty less innocent?

FujimotosElixir · 02/07/2015 07:27

against the tide here i would never let my 5 yr old see anything like that ,he still think the stork comes!

cailindana · 02/07/2015 07:29

Why Fuji? Genuine question.

meglet · 02/07/2015 07:30

dd saw a c-section birth on OBEM. The little pest was refusing to sleep as usual snuck down to watch it. she was born by cs so it seemed reasonable for her to see it. she was fine with it.

ExConstance · 02/07/2015 07:31

DS1 was 3 when he was present for the birth of DS2. It wasn't planned but as DS2 was born in the early hours, at home, we hadn't thought about what would happen if DS1 woke up and came downstairs. He was fascinated and very excited to see his brother arrive. They are very close and caring towards each other ( now in their 20's), this really seems to have helped them bond.

TheUnwillingNarcheska · 02/07/2015 07:45

Both my sons have seen c sections on OBEM, they were both born by c section and asked about it.

They are 12 and 9, think they saw it last year so at 11 and 8 years old.

I had not finished the program and had stopped it but the c section bit had already happened so I knew it wasn't too graphic.

They seem fine Grin

Hazchem · 02/07/2015 07:53

I saw my first birth aged 2 and a bit. I'm relatively normal.

slippermaiden · 02/07/2015 07:57

I showed my two a calm birth on one born every minute when they were about 4. They thought it was amazing, no further questions as they had all been answered by the film ???? I did pick them a quiet, natural birth tho, no emergency Caesarian!!

Idontseeanydragons · 02/07/2015 08:17

I don't see the problem with small ones seeing birth on OBEM it wherever but I'm not sure I'd have wanted any of mine to watch their sibling being born tbh. Mainly because I swore like a navvy had a tendency to get a little loud and I couldn't have coped with all the inevitable questions! Grin

L0gLady · 02/07/2015 08:31

When I had DS, a woman who ended up next to me on the ward had her 2yo with her, who had been there for the birth too. From what I gathered she had no support, which is upsetting, especially as her 2yo was so upset at being there.

ReallyTired · 02/07/2015 09:37

I thought this was going to be a home birth thread. Watching a normal childbirth should not traumatise a mother. Birth is one of the great miracles of life. The problem with child birth is that it can go very wrong very quickly. I think a three year old understandly be very frightened if he/she saw mummy lose a lot of blood or there was a lot of screaming.

OBEM often makes child birth look worse than it actually is for most people. It also shows births that make good TV rather than reality. I think OBEM is more traumatising than seeing childbirth for real.

DinoSnores · 02/07/2015 10:24

When I was planning a home birth, I watched a few of the OBEM clips with my 4 year old. I made sure they were calm, uncomplicated ones, but I wanted him not to worry if Mummy looked like she was in pain if I did have the baby at home. He loved watching them and found it really interesting. He didn't really ask anything about it but just thought it was amazing.

FujimotosElixir · 02/07/2015 10:30

a) He doesn't like medical things , b) i dont know i think its a bit meh, unecessary ....let them be innocent to the gory side a while longer.

cailindana · 02/07/2015 10:34

Again the word "innocent." It implies that knowing things about the world, ordinary things like how a baby is born, destroys a child in some way.

Cherryblossomsinspring · 02/07/2015 10:37

I wouldn't want my toddler or small child to see me giving birth. My toddler was there when I had bad morning sickness at times and was so upset to see me throw up. I did my best to avoid him seeing and when it happened always smiled and chatted to him throughout but he was worried. I can't imagine how he would react to me roaring and growling a baby out of me, and I would not be in a position to stop and reassure him.

EggOnTheFloor · 02/07/2015 10:39

My daughter loves this type of stuff, she is in infant school now but has happily watched OBEM for a couple of years (one of those similar snuck down stairs stories). She also loves medical type programmes, with surgery etc- she switched one on yesterday and I jumped for the remote. She begged me to keep it on as she is fascinated by the whole process of illness/surgery/recovery. She is adamantly opposed to having her own children, but thinks childbirth is interesting.

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