tell me if im just being an idiot?

[ghostspirit]

almost 18 year old aguing with almost 5 year old. 5 year old messing about with rabbit. 18 year old aguing with her about rabbit the 5 year old is making the rabbit escape blabla. ( the rabbit often escaps anyway and sits in the garage) so them to are bickering. and all i can hear is them 2 and 18 year old: mum mum mum. this went on for about 10 mins. i have told 18 year old to distract 5year old instead of aguing with her. its stupid things like could you get me a dustpan and brush or get some straw/water for the rabbit. when she is not here there is never hardly any aguing. there is some off course but not like when shes here she wants a debate with a 5 year old. she says its not about distracting a 5 year old its about her knowing what shes doing wrong. i call it looking for an agument. oh 18 year old agrees distraction does work but she still dont do it.

The 5 year old does wind the 18 year old up a bit but this is mainly after the 18 year old has agued with her set the bad vibes/feelings.

when she says shes going out i feel relived because it means it will be a reasonable day. the others ague but it feels more normal and not so stressful.

half the aguments would not happen if she spoke to her siblings and me in a better tone and not like shit. and it really upsets me when she speaks to my neghbours kids so nicely and speaks of her boyfriends siblings in a nice way .yet her own family are like shit on bottom of her shoe.

Why would you be being an idiot? What about? YANBU to expect an 18 year old to not argue with a 5 year old. YA also NBU to expect her to treat you with respect.

Yanbu, you do seem to have a lot of issues with your 18yo. She seems very immature, she's the adult and should be more tolerant and kinder to her young siblings.

mag she is immature not like other 17-18 year olds i know. although the law says shes 18 in a couple of weeks. shes really not... but shes still old enough not to agu with a 5 year old.

it just feels like dominos effect in my house today. i said i was fed up with everything coming on to me all the time all i get is mum mum mum.fed up no one thinking about me. 18 year olds reply was well your the mother.

and inbetween im trying to put up new beds clean the house with a screaming baby then on top got all that crap with the kids

Can't help you with the arguing but we used to have a rabbit that often got out and would hang around. We'd plug the hole up and it'd find another one. One day we found it in pieces, a cat got it. Rip River.

My older ones (17+) have very little patience with the younger one (8). They are often very condescending towards and argue with her which drives me MAD when I hear it. It's almost like they regress to her age when they're with her. Hard to believe sometimes that I was a parent when I wasn't much older than them. These are full siblings too. They were much better with her when she was tiny. It's heartbreaking really.
YANBU

I do feel for you - I was there once (and still am at times) with a big gap between DCs. DD has expectations of her younger siblings' behaviour which is way way way above and beyond what was ever expected of her at the same age - it's very wearing. It does get better, I promise.

23kids thats sad :( our one chases next doors cat.

kitkat i can hear my daughter now having a nice convo with next doors 5 year old!!! and yeah i discovered a few years back toddlers and teens are not good mix. shes had a couple of pregnancy scares. i hope she dont have kids for at least another 5 years