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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Replying to birthday invite.

5 replies

Lovewearingjeans · 21/06/2015 11:40

Right, going to try not to drip feed. I fell out with a friend just under a year ago. I heard from a colleague that she was pregnant (I work in a school, and she is a parent there, and used to do supply there too.). Unbeknown to me the info had come out from a meeting she had had at school. Anyway, that's a whole other issue.
I then text her to say congrats, as I thought it was common knowledge, she was 18 weeks by then. I said nothing to anyone else but her. She text me back saying thank you, but how had I heard as she hadn't told many people. For various reasons I didn't reply immediately, and she text me again the next day, with a cross tone, about who told me. I then text her back with colleagues name, she then accused me of lying about it, and saying really horrible, hurtful things. All in all about 6 messages that were very vicious. Four hours later I received all the vicious texts again. I then blocked her from contacting me through text and social media. I kept the texts and showed them to colleagues and mutual good friends of ours, who also thought they were very unhinged.
Anyway, our sons are of very similar ages, and our youngest are best friends. I have tried not to let this affect their friendship. We had to postpone my youngest 7th birthday because he was really poorly, ended up in hospital for a couple of days, so had to cancel all plans which included her son coming with us. This weekend coming, we are having the postponed birthday. I haven't yet received any RSVP from her (I have now unblocked her from texts). I am just really pissed off that it feels like she has control over the situation, and that I have to run round and find out what is going on.
She also has evil ex husband who might have the boys that weekend. Which I appreciate happens, but will invite other friends if they can't come! I really feel for her sons and don't want to make it horrible for them, as I think they can have a pretty crappy time of it. She is also known for bending the truth to suit her.

OP posts:
pasturesgreen · 21/06/2015 11:49

Frankly, one who has form for bending the truth to suit their own needs doesn't sound like such a great friend to have, even prior to the fall out.

She was horrible to you for no real reason, I'd distance myself a bit for the time being.

No need to run round this woman, she's probably enjoying the drama. No harm will come to the boys if they don't see each other for a while, these things happen.

Lovewearingjeans · 21/06/2015 12:31

I have grown to realise that. If I haven't heard by Wednesday, I think I will invite others.

OP posts:
reni1 · 21/06/2015 12:31

How restrictive are your plans, do the numbers have to be exact? If one more doesn't hurt, just invite the other boy you were thinking. Amazed you have all RSVPs except hers, I usually get 50% with many turning up even without having said they would.

Lovewearingjeans · 21/06/2015 13:33

Just a trip to cinema and food out. Both her boys are coming as her eldest is friends with mine. So tickets booked.

OP posts:
WaferInMyCoffee · 21/06/2015 14:41

Text her to say that you need a reply by Wedesday or you will be inviting other children to take th tickets you have already booked. Then do just that if you don't hear from her. But at least let her know so you maintain the moral high ground ;)

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