Bloody birthday parties ! lack of RSVP

[EvilTendency1]

DC has a birthday soon, sent the invitations out and have had 9 (out of 25) replies with a yes or no and only 6 have confirmed. DC will be very upset.

The invites have gone out to all as I checked with the teacher, not many children have been away or off sick.

Why don't people reply to RSVP's ?!

I did put a date on there to please RSVP by Thursday :(

It really helps if you send emails. It's much easier to hit a reply button.

You have to chase them. You shouldn't have to, but you invariably do. Do you have contact details for any of the parents?

Sadly I don't have any email addresses, I might have one or two mobile numbers from last year but nothing else or way to contact them - would it seem stalkerish to put another note in at school to go into bookbags asking for the parents that haven't contacted me to let me know ?

Are you in the playground at all? Asking face to face is the best way.

Other than that, start with the numbers you have. Ring them, confirm attendance (or not) and ask them if they have any of the other parents numbers etc.

I wouldn't send another note via the bookbags.

YANBU, annoying, thoughtless and cruel. They could at least give a few seconds of their time to send a text to say they can't come so at least you have the option of inviting others in their place. I have just sent out party invitations. I already know I'm going to be stressed out in 2 weeks not knowing if people are going to turn up.

Is it a soft play party? If so, 6 is not too bad - maybe just invite a few friend's kids to flesh it out to 10.

People are rude about invitations in general, if you ask me. (Massive generalisation, but I'm in a bad mood.)

Nobody in the world is too busy to send a text saying thanks, we'll be there or sorry, can't make it.

Not wishing to gloat, but ds has a birthday in a few weeks too, I was amazed how quickly people replied, only two outstanding, luckily ours is a low key party not one where I need to pay per person, so doesn't matter if they do or don't come, Yanbu though, it's rude and inconsiderate not to reply, I always try now to rsvp asap after receiving an invite.

Take the 6 out for a meal somewhere/ pool party/ movie . Make sure you aren't where the party is meant to be 30 mins before it starts. When parents complain tell them only 9 RSVP so plans changed.

I'd prepare for mayhem on the day. I sent out 20 invites, got 19 RSVPs so felt nicely in control, but on the day one turned up with no notice, two pulled out on the day, three brought siblings and one even brought four extra children whose families had come to stay for the weekend (with the invitee not with me, if that makes sense).

yep it's blooming annoying, we had 8 replies and then 19 turned up, luckily it was a booked venue and I'd done plenty of food.

Try and gather as any phone numbers as you can through texting /calling the ones you have

They may not have seen it! I found an invitation in DS's school tray on parent's evening 3 weeks after the event and had to apologise profusely.

A worse problem if they have a birthday at the end of August and have to give out invitations at the end of term. Some just forget by the day.

Dd1 had an invite for a 4th bday party. Unfortunately there was only a landline number on it and both times I tried it it was engaged. I then took it to work to try there but was witness to a nasty accident and needed something to write my details on so grabbed the nearest piece of paper without realising what it was so now I can't reply (although have left a message at nursery). If they'd just put a bloody mobile number or email on it would have been a lot less hassle.

It pisses me off and can really spoil the run up to the party. I supplied a tear off strip, home number, mobile number and email and still had to chase people in the playground the day before the party! One lady said 'oh yes so sorry, she'll definitely be there' ..and she wasn't.

DS1 is having a small party this year. Most have RSVPd, although a couple are maybes. I do have a bit of a dilemma with one parent, though.

DS1 was invited to her DS's party a few months ago. We didn't get the invite - there are three children in DS1's class with the same first name and surnames beginning with the same letter and we've had mix-ups before. The mum was clearly cross about it - I'm not convinced she believed we'd never had the invite - and put me on the spot about whether he could come. I had to check with DP about something I thought was happening that weekend, and then had to come back to her and said sorry, we couldn't make it. She didn't even respond to me - just walked off, and has been a bit unpleasant ever since.

Anyway, DS1 wanted to invite this child, so I handed an invitation to her mum, with the usual 'DS1 would love it if X could come' blurb, got an 'oh right' and a blank stare in response, and I've heard nothing since.

I have a nasty feeling we're in a tit for tat situation and she's going to make a point of not RSVPing. I don't particularly want to chase her if that's the case, but I might need to do an extra party bag just in case they show up on the day.

I hate children's parties. They're never straightforward.

It doesn't help you now but my friend became a class rep and put together a list of parents' emails and phone numbers for her class. It made everybody's life so much easier. Basically, become a class rep for a term, get contact details with a promise of a term social and then distribute the list electronically. Voila!

This bugs me too. I've got three that I don't know if they're coming or not, so have had to make up extra party bags and extra food. Based on previous years, a random will turn up and someone will drop out, so it should balance out.