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To find it hard to be grateful for this gift (car)?

84 replies

bereal7 · 19/06/2015 09:28

Ofcourse I appreciate the gift - it's a huge gift and in different circumstances I would have been screaming with joy.

Basically, I'm in uni and my parents just gave me a car as a birthday gift but I can't help but think "well how am I supposed to afford to run a car?" when I don't even know how I'll pay rent through summer before student finance comes in.

This makes it worse - before I received the gift, I opened a letter from SFE saying I would be receiving the bare minimum AGAIN and I was already upset and stressed because it means I have to accept that I'll be taking money from my parents next year aswell ! And now...on top of money for rent, I'll have to try and run a car.

For full disclosure, they will be paying the insurance for me but I know there's still a lot of costs involved with running a car. I feel bad cos I didn't respond as excited as I usually do with such gifts (I did try!) so think my mum might be a bit dissapointed.

Sorry for the long post - I just had to get it out to people who don't know me or my family !

OP posts:
Gileswithachainsaw · 19/06/2015 16:10

So happy it's all sorted op

your parents sound lovely and I'm sure they didn't intend for you to stress about it all. Flowers

Gileswithachainsaw · 19/06/2015 16:11

And you sound lovely too. I didnt think you were spoiled at all

whois · 19/06/2015 16:11

Yay glad it's all sorted OP!

victoriasplums · 21/06/2015 07:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

londonrach · 21/06/2015 07:53

I understand where you coming from op. Can you ask your parents to cancel the insurance and put it on a sorn for when you finish uni. Your parents have been very kind but not thought this out. Dh was left a car by someone in my family which at the time wasnt helpful as living in london we had no need for a car and more importantly no where to park it without great cost and we were stuggling to afford rent at that time. This car gift now gets mentioned by my dm and i thank her every time. We had to sorn it at pil and sold it 2 years later having driven less then 80 miles in it. Kind gift but wish someone else in my family had got it. I bet a box of food every week would have been more useful op. My pil did that, we got their buy one get one free items for years which was amazing thoughful gift. Xx

MillionToOneChances · 21/06/2015 08:12

Please do remember that you have so little loan because there is an assumption that your parents will help you. They want to help you. Let them help you. There's no shame in that while you're in full-time education.

TTWK · 21/06/2015 10:28

A car is a massive personal responsibility even if someone else is picking up the tab. My eldest son can drive but has no interest in having his own car. He just thinks it'll be something else to worry about, and we're in London, so he just doesn't need it. He borrows mine when he has to, but I reckon that's about once every couple of months.

No one should buy anyone else a car without checking with them first. It's not generous, it's pretty thoughtless actually.

songbird · 21/06/2015 10:36

Ah, bless you OP, glad you plucked up the courage to speak to them. I COMPLETELY get where you're coming from, ignore the haters!

Fluffyears · 21/06/2015 10:58

The student finance system is completely out of touch. They said my parents should support me, but they didn't take into account that I had a older brother at uni who they were saying the same thing to. On £24,000 they expected my dad to pay his mortgage and bills for him and my mother and support two students. Crazy!

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