To not tell my husband things?

[YesAnastasia]

For example, he asked me what a spray bottle contained & I just couldn't be bothered talking so I wouldn't tell him. Its personal. It really pisses him off.

There are lots of occasions where I won't tell him stuff because I feel like my privacy is being invaded & I tell him that.

Do I have to tell him EVERYTHING?

Maybe people should read the thread more carefully.

The OP doesn't have AS, she has a DH and a ds with AS.
It's not just a bit of chitchat about what did you have, it's a need to know absolutely everything the OP does, down the minor details. Not the same thing at all.

yes you need to accept people warts and all but living in a family wgere AS is so present is HARD. It's not a minor adjustement to a few 'quirks' it's a relentless.

OP I've just sent you a pm.

Tbh, I can see why the OP would be hidding the snack. Because when every single of your actions is followed by 'what are you doing? what is it?' down the minute detail, there is a point where you just dont' WANT to tell him anything anymore.
And it's easier to hide and have a bit of peace than actually answering.

fwiw, my DH, who also has AS, is the other way around. He isn't telling me ANYTHING AT ALL and doesn't want to know anything at all of what I'm doing during the day.
His pov is that he doesn't know these people so why wouold he want to know about what has happened with them (the fact it has some influence on me doesn't seem to register). In the same token, he doesn't see the point of talking about his day at work, down not telling me until the last minute, when he is really sure, that he will do a 2 week trip to SE Asia, because why would I be interested in that??
Hard to build any intimacy on that....

So he has learnt to smile and nod when I tell him about my day. But I still have no idea of what is happening to him during the day.
Because he is, rightly imo, getting annoyed if I press the subject and I keep asking him 'so what has happened at work?' and 'what about xxx?'
If people want to talk about their day, their snack, whatever, fair enough but you do not get to pry and extract information if they don't want to. That's not the same thing at all.

You are not being wierd, it sounds very tiring behaviour.

One of my children drive me nuts sometimes asking what I'm doing, what I'm holding, why I am getting my lap top, where I am going, what the conversation was about that he half over heard. I spend so much time explaining that its none of his business or extremely boring for me to talk about or repeat. Look cleaning the bathroom is boring enough please dont question me about why I picked up that cloth whilst carying that item upstairs, whilst making a pile of xx items on the stairs, whilst explaining what I shouted to your brother. It would find it very hard to deal with my husband doing this too.

To answer the odd question about a snack or product is one thing. Having to deal with a running questioning and commentary on mundane day to day movements would make me feel claustrophobic.

It does sound like the AS would explain the way he is but that doesnt mean you cant feel frustrated by it sometimes. It sounds like you need help setting some simple rules and boundaries with him. If you want to k ow the costs research it yourself and remember not to tell me the results ;)

When I read the OP you did sound a bit U but reading down further (and taking the Aspergers into account) I can understand your frustration. It was less about this particular question and more about a constant barrage of questions about trivial things. Just like trollknor, I can sometimes get very frustrated with endless questions from the DC about really trivial things. I accept that children have to ask questions as they are trying to figure out the world but it can get really tiresome.

I've no advice for you but sounds like you need a bit more time to yourself and some peace and quiet. Have some and and .