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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wonder WTAF Davina McCall is thinking here?

207 replies

DosDuchas · 31/05/2015 12:51

www.telegraph.co.uk/news/celebritynews/11640553/Davina-McCall-You-must-keep-your-husband-satisfied-in-the-bedroom.html

As we know, men have affairs because of sex and underwear... its the woman's fault

to wonder WTAF Davina McCall is thinking here?
OP posts:
Bullshitbingo · 31/05/2015 13:20

So sad, but as other posters have identified, she definitely has 'ishoos'. I just hope women don't read this tripe and agree with her.

Also what's this bollocks about all French women wearing matching underwear? Confused since fucking when? Just because they're French doesn't make them a homogenous mass who all make the same decision about their undercrackers!

WorraLiberty · 31/05/2015 13:22

Oh dear. Having seen AnyFucker's link, I can't take the whole wedding vows renewal seriously at all.

I didn't realise they did the whole American Little White Wedding Chapel thing.

Imo it's just one of those touristy type things that people do when on holiday in the USA.

HuckfromScandal · 31/05/2015 13:23

I agree with her, but it goes both ways, I expect my dp to stay fit and make an effort with his appearance, and sex is the glue that holds relationships together, it doesn't complete them, but it keeps it healthy and happy

I don't agree that men should be off out having affairs, but genrally it's because the wife has becomes so bloody wrapped up in being a mum, that she forgets why she fell for the person she is with.
(And the caveat of course is any abusive marriages)

AnyFucker · 31/05/2015 13:24

many people who indulge themselves with extra marital adventures are still having sex with their spouses...how do you explain that one, Huck

meglet · 31/05/2015 13:25

She's always struck me as someone who has massive issues like most of us. Her shouty, positivity drive me insane.

noddyholder · 31/05/2015 13:26

I can't believe people can't see through it but I have been a bit of a Davina when younger and its heartbreaking. All the while she is wearing her matching lingerie she can have a sense of superiority over those in their grey marks and sparks when deep down she feels so inferior she is dying She is trying to recruit others into her army of pleasers as an army of one is vulnerable to attack. I think she is about to crash and burn in the next few years her hysterical faux positivity just can't last

guiltynetter · 31/05/2015 13:29

noddyholder do you know her personally or something?!

noddyholder · 31/05/2015 13:33

no but I know the 'issue' only too well and its very obvious when you have been through it

ihatethecold · 31/05/2015 13:34

noddy?
how would you know that?

Original poster
DosDuchas · 31/05/2015 13:34

i know what you mean about women being wrapped up in being a mum but I don't think thats always the case.
Often men are very proud of their wives as mothers....

I think LOTS of dysfunctional marriages have LOTS of sex,, and the more people bleat on about it, the more suspicious I am ( see also houses with signs saying LOVE or HAPPY on the wall or whatever)

OP posts:
MajorasMask · 31/05/2015 13:35

Oh I'm really disappointed. I liked Davina and her work with drug charities is still something I respect her for. But this is scary to hear from her. Me and DP both deal with chronic illness and often wear dull underwear with the elastic wearing down - obviously our relationship is headed for the rocks Hmm

I am especially worried about this telling women with 'invisible' chronic illness/mh that they should put pain/nausea/distress aside for a healthy partner's sex drive. When I started getting ill I felt that sense of guilt about sex sometimes (even though I knew it was irrational) and if DP hadn't told me how wrong and silly that was then I wouldn't be with the right person.

AnyFucker · 31/05/2015 13:35

I dunno how noddy knows it, but I would say it is a fair assessment of the situation

noddyholder · 31/05/2015 13:36

I don't know her but she is a grown adult and intelligent and had a mother who was critical and never showed her any love and if you have been there and dealt with it you recognise it I could be wrong but I just don't think she would be so vocal if she wasn't damaged

Original poster
DosDuchas · 31/05/2015 13:36

sometimes things ring true for us, don't they.. Maybe some people have more insight.

OP posts:
Original poster
DosDuchas · 31/05/2015 13:38

that said, I LOVE that long lost family show - with no sign of Biggins at all!
( apart from the bit where NIcky Campbell 'researches' on his laptop in a moment of pure fakery)

OP posts:
fergalsharkeysfloppyfringe · 31/05/2015 13:38

Love that this tripe she has written has automatically developed into her husband being at fault. Of course, because all men are controlling, abusive, selfish arseholes. The world of Mumsnet seems to be about hating men. So fucking depressing.

noddyholder · 31/05/2015 13:39

WHy do you think she loves that show so much? AM hiding thread now but has been interesting to see what people think of her and people like her A bit too close for me :)

WorraLiberty · 31/05/2015 13:39

noddy, I know what you're saying but you're stating your opinion as though it's fact.

For all we know, she could be fed up of watching her career slide away and has decided to say something controversial to get her name back in the papers.

None of us really know.

Original poster
DosDuchas · 31/05/2015 13:40

fergal - actually we have barely mentioned him

This is something she is obviously happy with - for many reasons

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 31/05/2015 13:40

I have lots of sympathy for damaged women and those living in fear of being shelved by entitled men if they don't drop their knickers regularly enough, but it wears thin when they start trying to tell others they should do the same thing

Davina, meet Feminism. It's about time, love.

TheSpottedZebra · 31/05/2015 13:43

I think she's also talked about - or perhaps alluded to - the disparity between her and her husband's careers. As his tv career is no longer, and I think he had a failed venture or 2 along the way. And she has out earned him for years. She seems to have to talk a lot about how he is a big manly man's man, utterly in charge but not at all threatened by her.

I just think that these words come from quite a worried, sad place.

Original poster
DosDuchas · 31/05/2015 13:43

Just rereading thread and it IS insulting to women( and men) who work hard at their marriage only to find that their partner has other ideas.

I wonder how her mates who have been cheated on feel about it Sad

OP posts:
ItsTricky · 31/05/2015 13:47

I can see why a critical parent could produce people pleaser child, but surely this would end at their own front door. You shouldn't have to behave that way with your husband, your santuary, the one person you shouldn't need to 'perform' for.

NorbertDentressangle · 31/05/2015 13:48

So what happens if he does have an affair/ONS/leaves her for someone else?

How does that leave her feeling after spouting all this?

WanderingAboutRandomly · 31/05/2015 13:48

It's a very insulting thing to say about your husband. She is making him out to be a shallow idiot.

Sex is great and a really fun aspect of a lot of relationships but to say it s the glue that holds a relationship together is a bit scary, what if one of you gets a medical condition that makes sex difficult. I think it's love that is the glue that holds relationship together. At least it should be.