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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Getting engaged the morning after a friends' wedding?

101 replies

Sammo0 · 28/05/2015 16:37

Bad taste or ok? The morning after a friends wedding, a friend posted her news. Opinion is divided. What are your thoughts? Unreasonable and a bit attention-seeking or absolutely fine?

OP posts:
Chchchchangeabout · 28/05/2015 16:58

Surely the bride and groom would be off on honeymoon by then so not care/notice anyway

chaletdays · 28/05/2015 16:58

I think some people get way too invested in other people's weddings. Why do people give a damn who gets engaged the day after who's wedding?

CrystalMcPistol · 28/05/2015 16:58

Wedding is over so bride has no right to be irate. Definitely attention seeking behaviour though.

MrMacadoo · 28/05/2015 16:58

I can't link as on my phone but it was in the daily mail so I use the word newspaper loosely Wink

CrystalMcPistol · 28/05/2015 16:59

Now this is unacceptable!

Getting engaged the morning after a friends' wedding?
LondonBetti · 28/05/2015 17:06

My 'D'Sis and her DP got engaged at my wedding reception. They asked the band to announce it straight after our first dance so they could 'share our day' ...

CrystalMcPistol · 28/05/2015 17:09
Shock

Oooooh London, that's sibling rivalry at its worst! What mean spirited, attention seeking hogs they must be.

WorldsBiggestGrotbag · 28/05/2015 17:11

Can't even see why this would be an issue. Surely the more happy news the better?

SnozzberryPie · 28/05/2015 17:12

I think it's quite sweet, maybe the wedding put them in a romantic mood?

Capricorn76 · 28/05/2015 17:14

That's terrible London. Can some people seriously not bear to be out of the spotlight for five minutes?

DownWithThisTypeOfThing · 28/05/2015 17:14

Have I missed another rule? When did the "no engagements to be announced until x days after someone else's wedding" rule kick in? Are there exceptions to when you can announce it on FB depending on whether your own family and friends were at the wedding?

It's a minefield!

Lovetheleaves · 28/05/2015 17:14

Ooh London that's awful I agree. My Bil was all set to propose to my sister and my brothers wedding but thankfully he got cold feet. I don't think my brother and his bride would have been chuffed .

BIWI · 28/05/2015 17:15

We kept our engagement a secret because our closest friends were about to get married. We told them - in private - on their wedding day (at the reception), and they insisted on making a public announcement about it.

So even though we were sensitive to it being their day, they wanted to announce it because they were happy for us.

What on earth is wrong with that?

DownWithThisTypeOfThing · 28/05/2015 17:15

Cross post with London - actually AT the wedding is pushing it!

Minshu · 28/05/2015 17:16

I really don't get why this wouldn't be fine. Unless the friend had gotten engaged to the bride or the groom of the newlyweds and this was a distasteful way of saying how short a marriage it was?

Katymac · 28/05/2015 17:17

BIWI - that's what happened with DH & I

purplepppower · 28/05/2015 17:18

One of my cousins got engaged at the wake of her baby niece's funeral.. now that I found uncomfortable

SoldierBear · 28/05/2015 17:20

The day after - no problem.
Anyone who cannot be happy at such lovely news sounds mean spirited and petty.

Starlightbright1 · 28/05/2015 17:20

The day after the couples wedding is done..Move on.. The wedding thing is dragged out IMO with long stag/ hen weekends... If it was the bride posting she would be accused of been Bridezilla although she is probably off on honeymooon

SuperFlyHigh · 28/05/2015 17:21

Absolutely fine...

but I think some people would see it as stealing thunder Confused

Weddings can bring out the romantic in some men and women.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 28/05/2015 17:22

God, people are so self-obsessed these days! Absolutely no sense of shared joy, community or togetherness. If I were the bride I woUld be extremely flattered that someone thought my wedding romantic and special enough to spur them on to propose to their own partner.

I can only think that brides that would hate that are attention-seeking and hate the idea of the attention moving off them (I blame Hello magazine culture for this one), or else they genuinely have slightly crazed and jealous relatives or friends who also want some attention and that's the only reason they're doing it.

For most people, I would have thought iT's done because they are starry-eyed and enjoying the romance of witnessing the wedding vows and the love the couple have for each other etc. Everyone loves romance, share the love and joy, I say!

Don't get the problem with announcing pregnancy after sibling just gave birth. My sister announced her pregnancy a few weeks before I gave birth and I was thrilled - was thinking of the future shared family outings etc. Even better if it had happened on the day I gave birth. Would have been the icing on the family cake!

But then some families are wierd and not close. I have a wierd in-law who dropped everyone the minute her DD wasn't the only grandchild in the family. She actually said once that she loved being pregnant because she liked all the attention it got her.

Wierd, I tell you, wierd.

Share the love, people!

Binkybix · 28/05/2015 17:23

Absolutely fine, everyone has moved on from the wedding. It's not like he got down on one knee right in the middle of the bride and groom's first dance!

I'm sure I saw a YouTube clip of exactly this once!

WyrdByrd · 28/05/2015 17:25

People really need to get over themselves. Assuming your friends are a similar stage in their lives to you/each other this kind of thing will happen.

We went out for a meal with our 'gang' of friends several years ago when we announced our engagement, as did another couple & a third that they were expecting their first baby.

Two years later 3 of us announced our pregnancies a month apart & subsequently gave birth within 10 days of one another.

It's lovely - all the more to celebrate Smile .

NinkyNonkers · 28/05/2015 17:26

Of course! Lovely in fact, love is all around and all that.

VelvetRose · 28/05/2015 17:26

If I'd been the person who got married I'd absolutely love that! It just seems really special and sentimental somehow!!