To be annoyed my boys were told to 'scream like a girl' in an emergency?

[Kitsandkids]

My 2 boys went on a visit to a fire station this week with their Beaver group. Twice since then I have heard them talking about 'screaming like a girl' and then giggling about it.

This morning my 7 year old said that if there's a fire you have to scream like a girl. I asked him who had told him that, thinking it might have come from one of the other children, but he was adamant that a fireman told the group this. That if there's an emergency they should scream like a girl to attract someone's attention.

This has annoyed me a fair bit but I don't know if I'm over thinking it. To me it seems to be degrading to girls. Apart from anything else, my 2 scream a lot themselves - I'm always telling them not to scream if they see a bee, or get to the top of a climbing frame and can't work out how to get down. So it annoyed me a bit that they have been giggling over having to scream 'like a girl' when they probably scream more than lots of girls!

AIBU or would it annoy you to have your kids told this? I do understand that the fireman had to keep the attention of lots of excited kids but I think he could have worded it better.

[WhirlpoolGalaxyM51]

Just trying to think how I would react if I went to a work fire safety thing and was sitting there with my colleagues and the male instructor exhorted us to "scream like a woman". The first thing I would think was why was he only talking to the men, and the second thing I would think is "what on earth?".

I don't know if the group the instructor was talking to was mixed, obviously.

I suppose if my male colleagues went on a course and came back laughing reporting that they had been told to "scream like a woman" I'd be a bit surprised.

Not the boys who heard this advice were "giggling about it" rather than simply taking it as a straightforward safety tip.

I question this safety tip anyway TBH it still seems like extremely strange advice, for a number of reasons.

[WhirlpoolGalaxyM51]

Note* the boys who heard this advice...

in previous post otherwise doesn't make sense!

[Gottagetmoving]

They clearly do recognise the derogatory message about girls, or they wouldn't now be giggling about how funny it is to scream like a girl

So they are giggling because it's derogatory? Not because it's funny, or not because they would feel silly screaming,..or because they are just kids who will giggle at anything they find strange?
Bring your sons up not to make any remarks that females find offensive but be aware that they probably will make those remarks whether you do or not because boys and girls naturally compete and battle against each other from being very young without any brainwashing or training.

[WhirlpoolGalaxyM51]

Gottage why do you think boys would find it funny at being told to scream like girls? You think they might feel silly. Why?

[WhirlpoolGalaxyM51]

I mean you've written it there.

It is silly and laughable for a boy to behave like a girl.

That is wholly sexist and messages like that (subtle everyday all the time) cause immense damage to our girls and boys.

[WhirlpoolGalaxyM51]

Oh blimey just read the second bit, you think it is inevitable that boys and men will make remarks that offend females?

OK well then.

[PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom]

Why is it funny or silly to scream like a girl unless you have absorbed a message from our culture that, for a boy to do anything like a girl is funny or silly?

[2boys2girls]

Gosh you lot bicker like an old married couple ....
Oops "old" "married" "couple" ....
I dare I .....sorry !

[Gottagetmoving]

I think it inevitable that women will get offended,.not that all men will make remarks that offend women. I think it inevitable that little boys AND girls will make remarks about and to each other however much politically correct training they get. I did not say that it is silly and laughable for a boy to behave like a girl either!
The being silly would be being told to scream...Children are always being told not to scream. Are you not able to see how a child may think? They don't think like an adult,...That's why they laugh if you say bum or arse FGS...
I think the reaction to the guy's phrase is really a bit OTT.

[BertrandRussell]

Run like a girl
Throw like a girl
Do maths like a girl

Happy with all of those?

[2boys2girls]

I don't get offended .. Well I'm offended you think that l would... I agree that we should relax on the pc !

[2boys2girls]

Bert its not that I'm happy or unhappy I'm just not bothered by it? Why would/should I be ?

[Gottagetmoving]

Bert I wouldn't be happy or unhappy with any of those phrases,...because I am good at all of those things. My daughter could respond to those with 'thanks,...if I run like a girl it means I can run well' or of course, she could spend hours getting upset and offended because someone said she did something like a girl.
I dont understand why you give other people so much power over how you feel.

[LynetteScavo]

I just typed out a long post on my phone and my charge ran out.

So, I've asked DH, DS2 and DD what they thing girls do well. Things they think girls do better than boys. They know nothing about this thread.

DH said "Scream"
DS2 said "complain and get what they want". I think he means present their view well.
DD said "Be kind"



I remember over hearing a conversation at toddler group years ago when a mum told her small DS "Don't kick! "Only donkeys and girls kick!"

Was the first I'd heard of it.

[funnyossity]

YANBU OP.

I'd complain actually.

I heard a boys' football coach yelling girl based insults years ago and let it pass. Since then the club has gone into encouraging girls to play and generally become much more modern in it's approach.

I had let them off in my mind as irredeemable "dinosaurs" but I think I missed an opportunity tbh. (And maybe did them a disservice.)

Also my little boys have squealed quite successfully, i don't get that it's such a gender difference either. When the kids here are playing outside I can't tell which sex is screaming.

[Bedsheets4knickers]

Oh get a grip it was probably just to inject abit of humour . Seriously enjoy your bank holiday and forget about it

[WhirlpoolGalaxyM51]

"The being silly would be being told to scream...Children are always being told not to scream"

Well, yeeeeeesssss.

But they weren't told to "scream". They were told to "scream like a girl". That's kind of the entire point of the thread.

[namelessposter]

I have a good friend who is a senior firefighter and gives these talks. I wouldn't be surprised if this was him, although I appreciate that statistically it probably isn't. Remembering the correct language in these situations doesn't come instinctively to him (as a 40- something very-rural man) but he acknowledges the need for it, and it's certainly promoted within the service as important. In the context of a generally positive piece of feedback, a gentle point to the Dove 'like a girl' campaign, and the implications of using the same sexist language, would not, I think, be badly received.

[HamishBamish]

I had a 'conversation' with DH when he used this phrase to our sons recently. In context, they were playing and making lots of noise and he said 'stop screaming like girls' to them. I think it's a derogatory phrase.

Not sure what I'd do in the context of the OP, but it would have annoyed me too. I think the intended message could have been made in another way.

[funnyossity]

nameless that's what I was getting at, my word complain was wrong - I mean more what's known in horrible modern jargon as a "heads up" I think!

[Spanielsarecool1]

I can't believe how many people are getting worked up!! relax and just let it go, people over analyse soooo much!!i wouldn't give it a second thought-who thinks like this!!
Have a wine :-)

[BertrandRussell]

Oh I do wish people wouldn't underthink things so much!!