To treat my family out of a lottery win.

[Songlark]

I haven't won yet, probably never will but DH and I were discussing who we would treat if we won a few million. He wants to treat all his large family(6 siblings) fair enough even though 2 of them have never really been part of our lives (they'd snub you if they saw you in the street. So I said "and of course I'd treat my brother" (who's loaded but wouldn't snub you in the street, but disinterested in our family) DH thinks my DB shouldn't be treated because he's rich. But I don't see how you can pick and choose. I say just treat the lot of them and then it's fair. Which got me thinking. Who would you all treat or not treat if you won the lottery?

Friday99 - what if you don't have enough to give any to charity after all that? What takes priority?

I'd give my massive family something nominal like £10,000 each (seriously this would be most of any decent sizes winnings) then I'd help a few special cases out like my aunty who is a carer for my disabled uncle and has four kids. I'd prob pay off their mortgage but ask them not to tell anyone.

My parents, sister and in laws would get however much they need to pay off mortgages and mean they never have to worry about money again (maybe 1 or 2 million each), except my mil who is minted and would just complain I'd given her an even more expensive tax bill!

None of my friends are struggling financially so I'd prob just take them on lots of lovely group holidays/out for nice meals etc.

My kids would get private schooling and a lovely home to grow up in. It would set them up for life but I'd try and encourage them to be successful in their own right.

It would be amazing!

I've thought about this before too!

I would think that we would give my sister and DH's sister the same amount. SIL is married with 1 DC and 1 stepDC. My sister is single. Would still give them the same amount.

Would the give my parents a lump sum and an equal lump sum to FIL. DH doesn't have a relationship with his mum so wouldn't give her any.

Would never say how much we had won though!

We would split it absolutely equally between ourselves and our joint adult dc (except for sd, her share would be put in a trust fund for her ds when he got to 18).
With our share we would just live comfortably for the rest of our lives. I might get a Fiat 500 and we would have a week away in a good hotel every year. What was left when we died would once again be split with the kids. We have no siblings to consider and wider family would be treated if the win was big enough.
Sheer fantasy as I rarely enter the lottery anyway.

Why so much angst over something that will never happen? Why tie yourselves in knots and antagonise relatives on who gets a divvy and how much. When a) he odds on winning the jackpot are so minuscule b) the average jackpot win is 'only' 2m which won't fund a lap of luxury, never work again and houses all round plans people have.

I'd buy a bigger house than I'm in now where we live so that DS could carry on going to school, I'd buy my mum a bungalow, I'd put this house into DS's name and rent it out so he's got guaranteed income for when he's older. I'd probably buy a flat abroad for a holiday home.

I'd then give my mum, my DS and my DP some money, some to my dad and stepmum and some to my brother. Oh and I'd buy my bestie a new house as hers is too small for her 2 kids and her DH's 2 kids.

If we win millions then we'd buy a pub and use it as the reason for moving and changing jobs. Buy a bigger house near the pub and a smaller house for my dad. Set up trust funds for the dcs, enough to pay for uni/driving lessons/car/house. Pay into a private pension for my dad so he doesn't need to work anymore, I doubt he'd retire just yet as he hates having nothing to do.

We'd pay off pils mortgage and buy sil a house but put it in the nieces names. Depending how much we won we'd set up small trust funds for them which would see them through uni.

We'd go on a big family holiday somewhere for the entire summer holidays, Disney world and a Disney cruise would be part of it. When youngest dc is a bit older dh and I would go on a 5* honeymoon for our 10th anniversary.

I'd set up a charity to help young families get adequate housing and things like affordable furniture/appliances so they don't have to use brighthouse etc al and end up with big debts.

Neither of us do the lottery but if we did I think we'd split the winnings in half if large amount(or keep a certain amount as joint money and split the rest) and each of us can decide what to do. I disagree that some relatives should get more because they are wealthy, that will just cause arguments. fair enough don't give to relatives you don't see and don't like but I wouldn't exclude someone just because they have been successful.

get less not more

Pubs are a huge amount of work and very tying.

I watched a programme once on lottery winners. In the main the ones who had been generous seemed to have come off happier than those who didnt give any away. They couldn't understand how unhappy the money had made them. Kind of proves a point in a way. It's nice to have money but people are more important.

We were discussing this a few weeks ago and decided that we'd not tell anyone that we'd won for a couple of months - that way, it'd accrue some interest in the bank first. Then, we'd let on that we'd won some money, without telling anyone how much, and would treat close family and friends. The amount they'd get, and the number of people we'd treat, would largely depend upon how much we'd won of course. We would then say that this treat would be all they'd get because we'd tell everyone that, apart from a small nest egg squirreled away, it'd all gone - we wouldn't want to be seen as a pair of cash-cows after all.

saltedpeanuts in my fantasy I've won gazillions

Why so much angst over something that will never happen? Why tie yourselves in knots and antagonise relatives on who gets a divvy and how much.. Can't see any angst tbf or anyone tying themselves in knots. Also no relatives getting antagonised because none of them would know what your plans are. It's just a bit of harmless day dreaming. The odds of winning the lottery are nigh on impossible......it's just nice to dream. No harm done to anyone.

First we would pay off our own mortgage, maybe buy some land and vuild our own house, so dh can have his techy bits as he wants. Then I would pay off existing mortgages in our families, both of them, every sibling, parents, grand parents and neices/nephews. We would not include cousins in this, neither of us are very close to them. If people don't have mortgage (e.g. parents) I would give them an equivalent sum. If people then choose to move, we would not help with a new house, unless they unexpectedly had triplets or the like.

I would do the same for close friends, depending on needs. If not, then perhaps a second car here, a holiday there, etc. Cousins would get the same.

Of course this would not need to be a significant win. I think most people have an average of about £150k outstanding so would need about a million for immediate family and ourselves, and a further million for friends and extended family. I enjoy my job so wouldn't want to retire, but would want to be comfortable, so prob £2.5-3 mil would do. (Are you listening, lottery fairy?)

Guess I should buy a ticket!

We talk about this. If an obscene amount of money, we would set aside X each for the kids and set aside an amount for us to live off (very comfortably). We would then split the rest down the middle and each pass money on / donate to charities / fritter as we saw fit.

I would give a smaller amount to more people as I have a good few important people in my life. DH would give to his mum, dad and sister, then buy gadgets etc with the rest.

I have a spreadsheet for any wins over a million (although I don't currently play, so it's not likely to happen) but basically key members of my family get a cut. All my nuclear family - siblings and parents - get some, and my closest friend gets some and the rest is mine or charity's.

I have no DP, but would expect to treat both families the same if there was a DP on the scene.

I just remembered the time DH and I had a proper, raised voices argument over whether we'd give most of the jackpot to charity or not if we won silly money on the euromillions. (He says no, I say of course we fucking would).

My brother has schizophrenia and is an alcoholic/drug user so i would buy him a house and pay the bills monthly,and probably a cleaner to come in weekly. But i wouldn't give him money as it would do him more harm than good.

Mum and dad could have what they wanted. I would give loads to Click Sargent and Make a Wish foundation. I would love to have my own business.

It's great to think about what you would do if you had zero financial constraints BUT to make the conversation constructive I would be taking it one step further and thinkin about how you can make those dreams a reality.

I married DH in 2008 and the year before a couple of days after the new year we had the lottery conversation and it came up in conversation that DHs employer wasn't paying in accordance to his contract. That conversation had a huge impact on our lives as we took DH's employer to court and won. Ironically he is much more respected and has had a couple of huge promotions since. We are now in a position where we can help family. Heck I'm flying back home tomorrow to help my dad pack. Money gives you options and you can do great things with it. I consider us to be very very fortunate however I couldn't bring myself to fly into Manchester for $1500 when flying into Birmingham costs $800 with $50 to take the train to Crewe. We are donating the difference to a local charity that helps the retired with home issues.

We wouldn't give any to anyone. We love well already and any changes to our lifestyle would be put down to promotions. We would buy a flat for each of the children, pay off our mortgage and upsize slightly and would cover school & uni fees which we already pay. We would leave money to family in our wills but wouldn't tell them we have won anything.

We discuss this in work every time we do the euro millions....I need 88 million, that's all...not greedy like

Can't see any angst tbf

My MIL is still cross that I'd buy houses for family but they would remain mine and family would have a life tenancy for a nominal annual rent.

It seems that these seemingly benign conversations can unmask a lot of unspoken assumptions about family who is "worthy" of a gift, who is to be trusted with money, who should be first in the queue etc.

mamus us too!!
First time me and my oh had a proper argument was over where we'd live WHEN we win the lottery.
Him near his parents, me near mine. We've not discussed it since.

We based a conversation once on one of the big 40million wins, it's amazing how when you start going; 1 million to x
2 to y

I think we decided to pay off mortgages for parents & siblings and give them 2 mil. It doesn't sound a lot vs the 40 million but there's lots of charity bits we would like to do

I think however much I won (if it was more than, say £1,000) I would give each of my siblings 10% - and the same to DH's brother (even though he is much better off). We have 3 siblings between us, so that would be 30% of the win.

I'd put 5-10% in a trust fund or savings account for my DC, so another 10-20%

If we won a bigger amount (say over 50,000), I would also give 5% each to my nieces and nephews - in a savings or trust fund account - and 5% to my parents. I wouldn't give any to DH's parents because they have lots of money; I'm sure they would refuse it anyway, or suggest it is divided between their grandkids. That would be another 20%.

That would leave 30-40% to spend as DH and I saw fit.