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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder why we don't complain more about long queues for the ladies loo?

100 replies

BeakyMinder · 16/05/2015 19:29

Just come back from West End theatre where, yet again, the queue for the ladies stretched right round the theatre - 10 minute wait, spoiling the entire interval - while the gents was totally queue free. It's the same at every theatre, concert hall etc I've ever been to.

I don't get how this is still seen as ok?? I pay the same for my ticket as a man, so how come I have to spend my whole visit queuing and he doesn't?

I did a quick search and apparently there is an official government-approved British Standard (!) for loos which says that there should be double the number of ladies, because we take longer (and also have periods, might be pregnant etc). But most places have the same or even fewer ladies loos - www.publications.parliament.uk/pa/cm200708/cmselect/cmcomloc/636/636.pdf

And I also read that there've been big protests by women in China and USA about this: www.economist.com/blogs/analects/2012/03/toilet-parity

So AIBU to wonder why we don't complain more in the UK?

OP posts:
balletgirlmum · 16/05/2015 19:33

The majority of west end theatres are old buildings with antiquated plumbing systems that simply can't cope with more. They may even be listed so unable to make major alterations.

Often there are more ladies toilets, but they take more space than a set of urinals & when you factor in that the theatres would have also had to install some Doc M packs to toilets in order to comply with DDA laws it doesn't give much leeway.

Libitina · 16/05/2015 19:36

Just use the gents, in a situation like this, I do.

WorraLiberty · 16/05/2015 19:38

Just use the disabled loos Grin

NorahDentressangle · 16/05/2015 19:38

Perhaps info on the gents in these buildings would be useful.

I would use the gents if the queue was awful but tbh haven't often been into Gents toilets so it would be useful to know that there is eg 3 urinals and 2 toilets with lockable doors or whatever, rather than risk going in and losing place in the Ladies queue to find there is only one unlockable toilet cubicle for example.

mojo17 · 16/05/2015 19:43

Yes they are old buildings hence the lack of thought
I usually take over the gents with a group of friends and unfortunately a queue forms, most of the men sympathise and join the queue and then it becomes a unisex queue.
Quicker that way

slightlyeggstained · 16/05/2015 19:46

Agree that it's infuriating when public buildings don't provide enough loos for women.

I can see that it's harder to adapt older buildings, but frankly, I think people could try a bit harder. My finals were held in a building where the women's toilets were a good ten minute trek from the unairconditioned exam rooms, but the men's were down the hall. The exam rooms were incredibly hot and airless, so they advised everybody to take plenty of cold water.

Naturally this meant for female candidates this meant you spent a significant amount of time on the trek to the toilets. Angry

NeedAScarfForMyGiraffe · 16/05/2015 19:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DramaQueenofHighCs · 16/05/2015 19:49

TBH I really don't see why we can't just have unisex toilets and be done with it! (Maybe seperate men's urinals.) - They're all seperate cubicles, it's not like anyone can see you piss so what's the problem!?

Musicaltheatremum · 16/05/2015 19:57

Love the idea of unisex toilets muy men's toilets smell horrible. I can manage a whole west end show without going but my daughter can't. She goes twice before the show starts but I think that's excitement.

Monstersinthegarden · 16/05/2015 20:15

I do think unisex toilets are the way of the future. Saves mums worrying about sending 9yo sons into dodgy men's toilets or trans people being harassed for using the "wrong" toilets. Could maybe also have a separate urinal only room.

PunkrockerGirl · 16/05/2015 20:30

Some women (not disabled) are completely oblivious to the queue though. What the fuck do they actually do in there? I could take a shower, get dressed and put my makeup on in the time some women spend taking a piss in a public loo Confused

hiddenhome · 16/05/2015 20:37

Some of them will be sorting out their menstruals or adjusting complicated underwear which is why they take a while.

UnspecialSnowflake · 16/05/2015 20:39

It's a real problem from the other side too, in the west end theatres I worked in it wasn't uncommon on busy nights to end up with an extended interval because of the ladies loo que. All of the theatres had more ladies cubicals than men's, in fact most of the men's loos had a single cubical and a (disgusting) urinal trough.

All theatres would love to put more ladies loos in, but there's just no space. Most of the west end was designed and built over 100 years ago (when I assume women either didn't pee or weren't allowed out at night) and the loos are woefully inadequate.

angelos02 · 16/05/2015 20:44

I'd love to know the answer to why women take longer to go for a piss than men. If you want to spruce up yer make up, do it at the mirrors. If you take any longer than is absolutely necessary when you know there is a queue, then you are unspeakably selfish

Original poster
BeakyMinder · 16/05/2015 20:47

Why can't theatres just turn some of their gents loos into ladies?

Has anyone here ever complained and if not, why not?

OP posts:
SpringBreaker · 16/05/2015 20:47

I would say its pretty obvious why. Women have more clothes to remove, have to use an individual cubicle, wash their hands...

Men stand in a line at a urinal, need to pull down a zip and often dont wash their hands..

SpringBreaker · 16/05/2015 20:48

If you were happy to pull your knickers to one side and squat cheek by cheek in a trough with other women then I suspect that the queues would be much shorter.

hiddenhome · 16/05/2015 20:48

They could be sorting out their menstruals or incontinence pads Hmm

Plenty of women have weak bladders.

PunkrockerGirl · 16/05/2015 20:54

Oh bollocks, hidden we've all had 'menstruals' to deal with, without being oblivious to the fact that others need to use the loo and may want to enjoy their interval drinks/ice cream rather than queuing for the loo behind selfish gits who feel that the cubicle is theirs for the duration.If their underwear is that complicated, maybe save it for occasions when adjusting it won't hold so many other people up?

soupey1 · 16/05/2015 20:55

punkrockergirl and angelos02 you abvu. There are many reasons why a woman may be taking a long time and it is not just to stop you from getting a drink.

I agree there ought to be far more ladies toilets in public spaces but understand why in older buildings there aren't. Still most, if not all, women are as quick as they can be when using a cubicle so the queue is not their fault.

WalkingThePlank · 16/05/2015 20:55

I regularly complain in writing after trips to theatres, museums etc. I usually get a 'there's nothing we can do about it' response.

PunkrockerGirl · 16/05/2015 20:57

You don't wash your hands in the toilet cubicle though. That's what people are queuing for.

Andrewofgg · 16/05/2015 20:58

It's antiquated design by male architects . . . but the men's loos are off limits because to get to the cubicles you have to pass the urinals, and it's not on.

Years ago at the Albert Hall I was queueing in the corridor for a piss when a woman saw the queue and said YES - THERE IS A GOD. I had to tell her that He was only visiting: the men's loo on that floor was being redecorated, we were using one of the women's loos and the queue for the other . . . well, you can imagine.

Breadwidow · 16/05/2015 21:02

I always wonder why it takes people so long. In queues for loos with a number of cubicles I quite often emerge to find the person immediately behind me still waiting as I was out quicker before all the people who got into a cubicle before me. If I see a massive queue I make a special effort to be as quick as possible, after all you wash your hands / adjust make up etc outside the actual loo.

UnspecialSnowflake · 16/05/2015 21:04

People do complain, there just isn't a solution. In the places I worked I can't see how the men's loos could have been turned into ladies loos. Each level of the theatre had a ladies and gents on it, the gents were always the smaller of the two. I suppose it would be possible to repurpose a gents loo but that would leave a level without a gents, which would in turn bring it's own set set of complaints and problems.