To be so fascinated by old people

[Missu2]

Hi everyone I'm a long time lurker

Today I was at the shops waiting for my child to pick a sweet, when this old lady walks in now, when I say old I mean hunched back can hardly walk sort of old maybe nearly 90! And I was so amazed and I don't know why! I just had this thought "I hope I can reach that age"I tried so hard not to stare at her! but this is not the first time. And I have always had this urge to ask these old people about their lives and a childhood, so long ago it would be history.

My friends think I'm strange and to be that old would be horrible and so near death but I beg to differ, by that age I would have most likely lost most of my loved ones,mum, hubby etc. that dying would no more be scary to me, you have to really think about this lol.

I suffer from pnd my best friend thinks this is why I have an obsession of my interest in very old oaps but it is not, I have always found them inspiring to live life to the fullest and I just can't explain why!

Please someone feel the same way as me?! Or have I always been mad?!

Scared of responses but I'm honest and just want to know I'm not alone in this. oaps phobia is so strange to me, I can only hope to live so long!!

Joining in with you OP, they are fascinating. I prefer them to children really, would rather spend time with the old folks, they're quieter and you can catch them more easily.

I know there are a lot of ageist threads on MN, it's just down to money, what people perceive should rightfully be theirs. Thankfully, I don't see that in real life.

I'm fascinated with home front and 'make do and mend' stories. I even know the Lord Woolton's pie rhyme...

Of course it's not mad, people who are older have all got something to share- just like we all have- but the older we are, the more we have! It dies seem a bit odd to class old people as a separate race, but it is a bit so a symptom of how our society is at the moment.

OP you sound like your friends are very young/ immature if they think you're odd to be interested!

I remember in History at high school we were lucky enough to have a visit from a man who had survived one of the concentration camps and toured schools sharing his experiences with children.
We learn about it on paper, watch films and TV programmes about it, but to actually sit in front of a human being who was there at the time and saw the things that we had only seen on grainy film footage made it more real to me - which I suppose was the whole point.
I think that's part of the fascination - they lived the history we learn about and the chance to get first hand knowledge is priceless.
It'll happen to us - actually it already had happened to me, DS's class were studying 9/11 and had to interview people who saw it happen. It was a weird moment, I suddenly saw myself at the same age asking my Grandma about the time she was caught up in an air raid

My Grandad is 93. It's brilliant having 4 generational conversations about things like technology. Completely freaks my kids out

I used to help a little old lady who appeared every bit the suburban bank manager's widow she was. It emerged she'd grown up in S America where her father was a railway construction engineer. She produced fantastic photos of the indigenous people and herself with her rifle! She was taught to shoot in case of Puma attack. Never would have thought it.

This thread is baffling.

Why wouldn't you assume someone who is elderly has had a full and interesting life?

However, I don't stop to talk to elderly people about The Past because in all honesty, while the information in itself might be interesting, it isn't always conveyed in an articulate and interesting manner. That stands true of anybody, by the way, not just elderly people. My dad lived in London in the 1950s, was a teenager in the swinging sixties, lived through the union strikes and miners strikes in the 70s and 80s. He was still boring Lovely, but dull. Had that way of making people's eyes glaze over when he told a story.

Perhaps it is just me and reading this thread makes me think it might be, but I am personally far more likely to read a book, watch a documentary or go online to find out about recent historical events than I am to pluck someone who looks advanced in years out of nowhere!

SeattleGrace, thank you for sharing the picture of your grandparents. What a beautiful couple!

redcaryellowcar, your description of your grandmother almost made me cry. She sounds very similar to my grandmother ( just switch NYC for London)

Missu2, I get what you are trying to express in your thread. I think the title is a bit awkward but the sentiment is sincere.

I have been priviliged to know:

A gf who was torpedoed twice in WWII (and couldn't swim)

A gm whose own gm had a motor car, and a chauffeur, who used to accompany her to the station so she could catch a train to London to collect the rents. (the houses were all lost during the blitz)

An uncle who was a spitfire pilot, one of the 'few'

And my very best friend, Eric, who is an ex Air Force officer. He is very well spoken, upright, smartly dressed and almost certainly gay. I love him dearly and we are off to Duxford again on Monday. He is 83.

Get to know the older generation, they won't be around forever. Many have fascinating stories to tell, and often when they die those stories die with them. Listen, and pass their stories on to your children.

I love sitting in front of old people on the bus too, just listening to them chat.

I find this thread quite icky. The idea that old people are some homogenous group and great entertainment is weird. They are just people. Some are lovely, some interesting and some are horrible or rude... like other people are.

If the thread had been about specific old people and how interesting they were because of x, y and z (as some of the very lovely posts have been) I wouldn't have a problem but "awww aren't old people great!" is belittling and patronising. You wouldn't dream of starting a thread saying "aibu to be fascinated by gay people?" or black people.

Yabvvvvvvvvu.

YY Moving!

Oh, so if I say I like children, is that 'icky' too as they're a homogenous, sticky-fingered mass?

I generally have a lot more time for elderly people than I do for any other sector of humanity. It's not the fascination of the people themselves, but what they know, what they do/did, their experiences, their outlook... all of the things that make up a person. I'm rarely bored by an elderly person as they seem to know an awful lot.

Your comment about 'gay' or 'black' people is a bit pointless, I think, I don't like it anyway. Old people are not a race and nor are they a sexual orientation, they're people.

I find it odd because I work with the elderly. Some are utterly delightful. Some are not :) Many are rude, unpleasant, sexist, racist, snappy, irritable and demanding.

I do find the idea of someone trying not to stare at them in a shop, or deliberately sitting near them on a bus to 'hear them talk' odd!

I can understand the 'I like children' comment because, I suppose, their personalities aren't yet developed. Elderly people very much have had their personalities developed!

Well put Camel! I knew what I meant but couldn't articulate it. I think it is a shame when elderly people are reduced to a childlike state and 'finding them fascinating' is part of that.

I'll go back and read the thread. I don't understand people who would treat them as some sort of exhibit or wind-up toy, no.

I do find myself sidling up to old men who smile at me though if they remind me of my beloved granddad.

Well that's just nice lying :)

I like Imperial Leather soap because it reminds me of my grandmother as well

Age, like sexual orientation or race is a protected characteristic so while you might not like it Lying it is extremely relevant to draw a parallel between the two.

Anything that defines people or attributes attributes based on something as arbitrary as a protected characteristic is damaging and wrong headed. When it is based on race or sex we have specific words for it. In this case we do as well and the word is ageism.

Using "they" or "them" to describe a group based on one single characteristic and not their words or actions is perjorative.

What you have to remember is that inside every old person is a 19 yr old screaming "whoa, wtf happened?". Puts a whole new perspective on things. We are who we are, its just our bodies that change.

Yes. That is so true.

And all you young 40 year olds on this thread will wake up tomorrow thinking WTF as well. We pensioners are not a different species. We are just you but with a few more wrinkles.

Fair enough Moving, I think I probably am guilty of positively discriminating where the elderly are concerned. I generally just do like 'them'.

fiveacres... smell is so evocative, isn't it? For me, it's 'Clan' tobacco. My granddad used to save me his pouches and make them into 'handbags' for me...

:) Lying. I also have things that remind me of special people and from childhood lots are about grandparents. It's nice to remember.

fiveacres, I'm not weird, I don't look on old people as a different species and I don't go seeking them out on buses, it's just that if I happen to sit in front of them on a bus I love listening to their chatter. Always seem to talk sense. I also love listening to children chattering too. I'm a perfectly normal person.

My dad, has overall led a very small and boring life, with a good measure of an absolutely awful childhood. He now lives an incredibly restricted life, caring for my mum who has dementia and limited by his own terrible health. No stories of derring do or amazing experiences to offer.

But, I am extremely grateful to the people in his town who give him a few minutes of their time to listen to him witter - it means a huge amount to him as its the only RL conversation he gets.

So if somebody wants to chatter at you, and you have a couple of minutes, then please give them that time. You probably won't learn anything earth shattering, but you might make some older, lonely persons day a bit better.

Why, Rose? What specifically about the 'chatter' of 'old' people is so lovely? I am sorry if I sound clipped and terse but that attitude is unbelievably patronising.