Ridiculous demands from theatre group

[nameyname]

Name changed as I think this might me identifiable! DDs are in a theatre group which does a show with adults and kids each year (Oliver type of thing). Middle dd has been doing it for four years, youngest started this year and older dd auditioned every year but not been in it before this year as she has never been offered a main part before.

They are expected to rehearse for two hours every week but older dd has a role that means she is not in a group with the other children but in different scenes so she has to go to extra rehearsals on a different night and attend the main rehearsal where she is often hanging about for ages to do her but as they insist on running it in order rather than letting her do her bits and go home. She doesn't really mind but is really irritated by the fact that the adults who aren't involved with a scene are often invited by the director to comment on what they've just seen but she is never allowed to offer an opinion.

She came back last night from rehearsal really fuming because director told her off for not having learnt all her lines yet and made her feel bad because she couldn't do it off by heart yet, I know they need to learn lines but the show is still a month away so she's got ages to prepare.

The other thing that is really annoying me is that they are expected to provide costumes which are going to cost me a fortune for three kids, this is supposed to be a free activity but in reality it's going to cost me over £100 by the time I've bought costumes and tickets.

So the question is wibu to have a word with the director to point out that this sort of thing is supposed to be fun but her attitude is sucking all the joy out of it for my family, specially dd1?

I see what you're saying mellow but in turn, she should behave like the other actors and should have learnt her lines by now.

and also, the mother shouldn't expect the company to change the entire schedule to suit her daughter.

Can't really comment on the hours/hanging around as I don't really have the knowledge to help. However, you say this is a free activity so I am assuming all the theatre experience/tuition is free? It's costing you £100 because you have 3 DD's attending, it's actually only costing you £33 for each daughter to receive training, attend rehearsals and take part in a live performance. That actually sounds like good value for money to me.

Really talented actors learn their lines.

Pah Hahahahahaha.

This is a hilarious thread.

On the off-chance you're being serious OP, you need to give your head a wobble.

I really think if the mother went to the director and said "she's been in school plays before so is probably more experienced than some of the actors here, and you should change the schedule for her, and she still has a month to learn her lines so stop telling her off"

The director would probably drop the girl and they'd all have a good laugh about it down the pub!

AyeAmarok - I love your turn of phrase - "you need to give your head a wobble". Brilliant!

ok - at the risk of outing myself - I've chaperoned kids involved in adult productions and without fail the worst kids in the production are the 13, 14, 15 age group. They really act like they should be the centre of everything and generally have a really annoying attitude. They also have little experience and don't give consideration to other people. They are also the most likely to argue with the director.

I never thought I'd say it, but a bunch of 5-8 year olds are so much easier to supervise as they see the production as fun whereas the teenagers seem to think it's all about them and are far harder work.
What a 13,14,15 year old sees as reasonable is generally not what an experienced director would see as reasonable.
Learning to fit into an adult environment is a key skill that 13,14,15 yr olds need to learn.

I'd wonder why an really talented actress had only been offered chorus before That is an uncharacteristically mean thing for me to say, but sorry, YABU.

Yes obviously the girl needs to fulfil her end of the deal. As I said, it's not clear from the op whether the dd was told to have her lines memorised by that point. If she had been told, it's not unreasonable for her to have been told off ( though personally I'd have given her a stern warning rather than a bollocking and definitely not treated her differently or with less respect than I would a. adult actor in that situation). If she was not told that was expected to have the lines memorised by that date then it is clearly u to shout at her for not having done it!

She sounds like she's got too big for her boots. Instead of encouraging that OP you should be having firm words. If she wants the honour of a main role in a high quality production involving adult actors, then she should behave with appreciation and co-operation, not whinge and moan because she isn't treated like a special little snowflake who can't be left hanging around, or be expected to learn her lines, but who should be allowed air her opinions on other people's performances.
Seriously, who's going to listen to a 13 year old telling them they should do it this way or that way. They'd all just be itching to tell her to pipe down. Don't turn her into a stage brat!

The point of the exercise is not primarily for your DD to have an enjoyable time, but to put on a high quality theatrical performance.

When I was producing shows, I took the view that the better the production, the more fun it would be for everyone involved, so everything was planned around putting on the best show we could. So we didn't tolerate lateness, unlearnt lines, failure to provide the proper costume, general indiscipline, etc. because it threatened our overall goal.

Occasionally there was moaning, people wanting exceptions made, grumbling if the director was particularly harsh. But any minor inconvenience or bruised egos while we were going through the rehearsal process were held to be as nothing compared to how bad we would feel if the opening night wasn't as good as we wanted it to be.

I seriously doubt that your DD has any theatrical experience at all if she hasn't grasped that central fact.

My DD was involved in a town pantomime when she was 14 having done various school plays and youth group shows before. It was a real eye opener for her, especially the hanging around, occasionally turning up to rehearsals and them not even getting to scenes she was in.

We supported and encouraged her in understanding this is how it is, and the performances would be worth it. She learned to take books to rehearsals, or schoolwork.

OP, YABU. Your daughter needs to show she can be quiet, respectful, reliable, & hardworking. Then she needs to let her talents show on stage. Only then, probably in a later production will the director respect her enough to consider her views. You need to encourage her to behave correctly and to have the right attitude.

Couldn't she use all the waiting around time to learn her lines?

Having been a theatre brat myself, she sounds like the sort of person we'd have given short shrift to. Not willing to be in the chorus? You learn a hell of a lot about acting and theatre in the chorus.

Ahahahahahahahahaha. Oh good grief OP, you have made me laugh.

Please do speak to the director about this, and then come back and tell us what they say. I could do with another good laugh.

[headwobble emoticon]

Yabu. Sounds standard for a drama group to me. I spent many an hour Sat around waiting to rehearse my parts. I used the time to learn my lines/songs/dance moves. Read a book or do homework.

In case you haven't fully taken it on board yet OP- YAB(massively)U

your daughter is 13 and is fuming because her opinion isn't being sought? Do pass her my grip won't you?

No advice & assuming this isn't real just wanted to say thanks for the laughs OP I needed a chuckle

Urm what your dd is in a theatre company you want her to just her bits she cant just do her bit it wont work i think you need to find another solo activity

OK I accept I donk know as much about theatre groups as some here, it does seem like a massive waste of time though to be waiting around for hours every week. I can't believe people put up with that as standard.

People put up with it because that's what goes with being involved in a show. I can quite understand people thinking they don't want to spend their time waiting around at rehearsals but then being a member of a theatre group has yet to become a legal obligation.

Unless you are in every scene in a show you'll have to wait around for your turn

Another theatre brat here I started to act at 12 because my newly adopted DB did. My memories of my first professional play were (1) plenty of time to do Homework as I was on a school scholarship program for (by then) both maths and music, (2) my French improving beyond all recognition thank to someone who went on to star in LotR and (3) learning to knit and play poker.

If your DD does not know not only her part but most of the others she will find it very hard to give any sort of direction and she needs to be open to learning from the others however inexperienced she (or you) think they are.

If she starts to go for professional roles she at her age will be up against children who have done years in the chorus lines who know the ropes.

Well if it's any consolation OP, I doubt you'll have to go through this again next year.

Midnight

But the OP will have to go through it again next year as she posted the exact same last year, and surprise surprise, received the same comments
OP you're having a laugh.