Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5

Original poster

To be upset over what these so called Friends have done today?

103 replies

JellyJamJam · 10/05/2015 11:35

I've namechanged as I feel a bit upset and embarrassed.

A workfriend asked if I wanted to meet up this weekend at a soft play centre, and then said another colleague was coming too, which was fine with me.

Yesterday evening they each sent me texts saying that they can't go. One said she was ill, the other said her husband was off work so they were going out. Fair enough.

However one of them has just checked in on FB at a cinema, tagged the other one and said they're having "a great day out with the kids".

Charming!

I'm pissed off. The second colleague that was invited along cannot bear people to be friends with each other, she wants to be involved in everything, so I am assuming it was her doing.

Won't be organising anything with either of them again!

OP posts:

Fugghetaboutit · 10/05/2015 12:35

Fuck puppets love that

ConferencePear · 10/05/2015 12:37

They're unkind and thick - you don't need friends like those.

Enjoyingmycoffee1981 · 10/05/2015 12:43

Really horrid, and I feel for you.

Always baffled though at the lack of introspection on these threads though.

If something like that happened to me, I would feel angry, pissed off and upset. I would also think to myself, why? This is strange behaviour from supposed friends. Maybe I have done something that means two people would lie rathe than spend time with me. The thought doesn't seem to occur to so many though!

Blarblarblar · 10/05/2015 12:45

So mean, that's really horrible what a pair of fuckwits.

Enjoyingmycoffee1981 · 10/05/2015 12:46

As for the passive aggressive comments. NO!

Message both privately say that you are upset that they lied and didn't include you. No swearing, no ranting, just the truth. You are upset and understandably pissed off, and would like an explanation.

CaptainAnkles · 10/05/2015 12:47

'So glad you're feeling better after your mythical illness. Hope you enjoy your day together, don't bother contacting me ever again, you revolting pair of two-faced skankbags. I feel sorry for your kids.'

Not really, but isn't it tempting?

littlejohnnydory · 10/05/2015 12:49

That's nasty coffee. I think the 'what have I done?' would occur to most people but it's usually nothing other than make plans with bitches. A couple of days ago they were happy to spend time with the op, and sounds like one 'friend' made the plans in the first place. So unless the op has inadvertently done something heinous in the past 24 hours it's unlikely to be her fault and even if she had, doesn't justify the others' behaviour.

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig · 10/05/2015 12:51

So are they definitely there together, or is it the one whose husband is off, tagging the one who's ill?

LimeFizz · 10/05/2015 12:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pumpkinpositive · 10/05/2015 12:57

JJJ. I know it must be a horrible experience, but hopefully when the smart wears off you can have a good old LOLZ at just how thick your ex chums are.

After all, you can always find other friends. They can't get a brain transplant.

gamerchick · 10/05/2015 12:57

If you work with these people just unfriend quietly and act normally with them at work.. Decline all future plans.

They'll know why and probably won't say anything. It's not worth it and you've probably dodged a bullet with a couple of twats.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 10/05/2015 12:58

What hotfuzz suggested!

I actually came off Facebook because of something similar.

lunar1 · 10/05/2015 13:03

I'm not surprised you are upset. What a pair of nasty bitches.

BitOutOfPractice · 10/05/2015 13:03

Oh that's awful. Why are people so horrid?

Chipshopninja · 10/05/2015 13:05

That's awful OP I feel sorry for you.
They obviously don't care about your feelings

Defriend and be nothing but cordial at work

Oh....and make sure you have a nice day with your kids today

abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz1234 · 10/05/2015 13:10

I think your message is good but I have a rule not to be passive aggressive if I can help it not sure I always manage it I would tell them tomorrow that you want to be sure of your facts because it looked like they lied to you. I would aknowledge that they have the right to do whatever they like in their free time but that you would have appreciated it if they had been honest with you.

I'd then step back from any friendship with them unless they come up with a credible excuse and an apology.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 10/05/2015 13:14

It hurts when this happens. They're not friends so called or otherwise. The clique cunts.
I got rid of my friends because they were forever organising days out ect and never including me and dd. it was always oh wasn't it great when we all went out with the kids. I let it go over over my head the first couple of times whilst inwardly seething. In the end I blew my top. Couldn't help it.

I got rid and so should you.
Anyway I saw the aunt of one these ex friends and she said "oh you should go down and see our insert name here, she misses you and my reply was well insert name here and the rest of them should of treated me properly.

MrsTedCrilly · 10/05/2015 13:49

Ugh, I hate hearing stuff like this.. Why couldn't they just be honest, so much less hurtful. Just try and have a great day doing something else and be bright and breezy when you see them.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 10/05/2015 13:52

Also why have you nsme changed out of embarrassment.
You've nothing to be ashamed of.

Shockers · 10/05/2015 14:00

Be careful about jumping to conclusions. If it is the one whose H is off that posted, she could have taken the ill one's children to the cinema for her and then tagged her to reassure her.

TwoAndTwoEqualsChaos · 10/05/2015 15:09

*Hotfruzzas" status but tag them ...

TwoAndTwoEqualsChaos · 10/05/2015 15:10

Sorry, Hotfuzzra

Bunbaker · 10/05/2015 15:13

"I'm confused. Are they both at the cinema together?"

I'm confused as well. Are they both at the cinema, or is the one whose husband is off there and she just tagged the other one?

bigbumtheory · 10/05/2015 15:24

Im sorry op, they aren't friends.

WhoNickedMyName · 10/05/2015 15:27

the one who's husband is off might have taken the ill friends children to give her a break.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5