... to wish for better communication with MIL

[helloelo]

I've always found my MIL to be a charming, if quirky, lovely and loving person.
However we've recently had communication issue and I'd like to know if IABU or not and WWYD please.

It was agreed she would babysit our 3mo DS on Saturday pm for the first time.
Off we went to the cinema.
On our way back, I called asking if she needed something from the shops.
She replied to come back, the bottle didn't work, he had not slept, was crying and don't go to the shop, come back.
DH ran a few orange lights and we came back super anxious.

...

I ran upstairs to find MIL and DS perfectly happy.
I should have understood the bottle didn't work [DS spits a bit with his bottle - a Medela Calma he has to suck on to get bmilk - but ate the entire thing], he had not slept [apart from 2x90min in the 5hours we left which is normal considering there's new funny people to smile at], was crying [had just started to be grumpy] and don't go to the shop [because she didn't need anything], come back [whenever you get here].

WIBU to be in quite a state?
WWYD to improve the way I communicate with her?
We care about her and would like this event not to be the seed for future issues.

Thank you for your additional replies, esp. Marceline, made me feel better as I really had the best intentions (what was I thinking posting in AIBU anyway... )

I had a chat with DH and we agreed we'll take it slower and check in more often when / if she wants to babysit again. You're right florentina you might be used to certain babies and not others, it can be hard. I should have called her back but then we were 10min away so I had a fight/flee sort of reaction, very instinctive, it's my first baby I'm learning, these experiences are positive in the long run I think.

No worries.
You and your DH know the person involved and it speaks volumes that he is so upset. In the same circumstance, I would reassure rather than worry the parents.

Agree a safe word for next time so you know if you need to make a mad dash.

Ah bless you, OP if you search in classics I'm sure there's a thread about PFB moments...we all have them, the key is recognising them years later

I still cringe when I remember being arsey with my own parents over my PFB Toddler over a lack of cooled boiled tap water. For a toddler.

Reading your post again reminded me when we got our cat, this was even more of a PFB than the DC. She came in one day with the smallest scratch on her nose and DH rang the emergency out of hours vet. We cringe now.

It must be ingrained to protect our DC and cats when they are vulnerable, I think. have a look for the PFB thread, it's very good.

Your Mil panicked she was probably expecting milk burp bed from the baby did you reassure her that baby was fine and ask if she was ok ?

I meant to say you panicked she panicked

I don't know if this is the one i was thinking of but here you go, as penance for my earlier harsh post up the thread

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/parenting/346540-your-top-pfb-precious-first-born-moments/AllOnOnePage

Thank you yesIdid :)

To ask a silly question how is she normally when talking to people on mobiles?
My mum still think it costs the earth to use mobile phones so talks like a telegram.
everything fine. home soon.

Ah sure it will be something you laugh about in the future. Probably to the boredom of your dc at every teenage birthday.

Think you were all a bit pfb and who isn't?