Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

Am I being a piss taker

55 replies

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 04/05/2015 13:28

I've been laid low with hyperemesis the past three weeks. DH wanted to go to play golf sat I asked if he'd reconsider because of how ill I've felt. He's now having a paddy saying I'm a piss taker because I'm taking our kid out to a tearoom saying oh it's okay when you decide you want to go out despite the fact a I'm taking the kids out and b I still feel like shit

OP posts:

EatShitDerek · 04/05/2015 13:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 04/05/2015 13:31

Because he's got nobody to play with today

OP posts:

Sirzy · 04/05/2015 13:31

Well if you are well enough to go out then why can he not have a few hours to play golf?

EatShitDerek · 04/05/2015 13:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MythicalKings · 04/05/2015 13:34

I think you are being a bit of a piss taker, I don't understand why you don't want him to play golf.

GaryBaldy · 04/05/2015 13:34

Wait, but you're taking the kids with you, so it's not like he is having to do anything to enable you to go out....but I guess he wouldn't be taking the DCs with him to play golf, so you would need to look after them - yes?

mrsdavidbowie · 04/05/2015 13:39

Can you get someone to keep you company?

Charlotte3333 · 04/05/2015 13:39

I dunno about piss-taker but it's a little unreasonable asking him to cancel his golf.

DH here golfs once a month, I had a bad bout of tonsillitis a few months ago and felt like death, so phoned MIL on the Saturday evening and she took the DCs overnight and all day Sunday. He went golfing, the DCs got time with their Nanna and I got peace to sweat out my illness without having to silently resent anyone. Do you have anyone locally you could ask to give you a hand with the DCs when you need it?

WorraLiberty · 04/05/2015 13:42

I think the OP might have meant the Saturday just gone?

kittycatz · 04/05/2015 13:43

Or do you mean he wanted you to play golf with him? Don't understand your statement "Because he's got nobody to play with today?"

If you mean that he wants you to play with him and you aren't feeling well enough then YANBU but if you mean that he can't go and play because you aren't feeling well, but you are well enough to go to a tearoom then YABU.

WorraLiberty · 04/05/2015 13:45

I think the OP didn't feel well last Saturday, so asked him not to play golf.

She feels a bit better today, so decided to take the kids out.

He's now saying she's taking the piss because she's well enough when she wants to go out, but not when he does?

I could of course be completely wrong

BackforGood · 04/05/2015 13:46

I think YABU.
If you are so ill on Saturday that you can't cope with the thought of him being out of the house for a few hours, I can't see how you are well enough to go to a tea room today. I can see his point.

basgetti · 04/05/2015 13:46

If you felt ill on Sat but are going to a tearoom today then YANBU as you can have good and bad days with HG. If you went to a tearoom the same day you asked him to cancel the golf then YABU.

shewept · 04/05/2015 13:46

I wouldn't say pisstaker, but if you want him to cancel plans because you are too ill for him to go, then you are too ill to be taking the kids out.

I suspect there is more to this...waiting for more info.

LadyDeadpool · 04/05/2015 13:53

So you're well enough to take the kids out today but will be too ill in 5 days to lounge on the sofa while they watch a movie? Pisstaker then imo

bloodyteenagers · 04/05/2015 13:55

You felt like shit and asked him to stay in.
You still feel like shut but can take the kids out.

How many time have you done this?

WorraLiberty · 04/05/2015 13:56

The OP needs to clarify whether she meant last saturday or next saturday.

FenellaFellorick · 04/05/2015 14:01

Do you mean saturday just gone?
If you are saying that 2 days ago you felt particularly shit and asked for help based on how you felt then but now you feel like you could manage to get out for a bit then he is being ridiculous.

Either you are too ill to do anything ever or you have to always be ok??

ilovesooty · 04/05/2015 14:01

Presumably she felt so ill last Saturday she couldn't cope with him going out but feels sufficiently well today to go out to a tea room. That's what I understand anyway.

BerylStreep · 04/05/2015 14:01

Why is the OP getting such a hard time?

She wasn't well enough on Saturday to look after the kids while her DH played golf. Today, despite still feeling awful, she is taking her child out and giving her DH some child free time, albeit that it is too late for him to arrange to play golf.

Fortunately I haven't had hyperemesis, but I believe it is terrible. Op has had it for the last three weeks.

He sounds selfish and lacking in any understanding about hyperemisis. Since when was a game of golf more important than a DH caring about his wife & unborn child?

Rudawakening · 04/05/2015 14:04

Im suffering with HG at the minute as well, threw up on myself this morning, the joys.

As I rea it you asked him not to go Saturday to play golf, and now he mad that you're going out today. I get that you probably feel better today but I think it's a bit unreasonable to ask him if it isn't very often and he is generally helpful.

I wouldn't dream off asking DH no to go out, as long as I could still reach that bathroom.

WorraLiberty · 04/05/2015 14:06

I wouldn't dream off asking DH no to go out, as long as I could still reach that bathroom.

surely it depends on how easy/difficult the OP's kids are to look after?

PHANTOMnamechanger · 04/05/2015 14:08

hyperemesis is awful - I ended up in hospital on a drip for a week, having been vomitting up to 20 times a day - truly grim

the ONLY behaviour for a DP when a woman is suffering liek this is to step up to the mark and be TOTALLY supportive, bending over backwards to help. Not sulking about HIS time out and calling her names!

Oldraver · 04/05/2015 14:10

He has a point.....

shewept · 04/05/2015 14:10

I think more info is needed.

I assumed dh cancelled last Saturday, now feels well enough to go out today. She can't help that.

But from her dhs point of view, she asks him to cancel stuff but is well enough to do the stuff she wants to do. He obviously suspects she is making more of the hg when it suit her.

Unless he is a total dick, I would imagine this has happened more than once.

Flip

1 2 3

Swipe left for the next trending thread