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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think allowing our sons to play rugby is irresponsible parenting?

318 replies

AddToBasket · 04/05/2015 11:40

There's another article in the Times today about Professor Allyson Pollock's attempt to get people to understand how dangerous school rugby is. She's been abused on Twitter, stonewalled by other parents, ignored by Rugby's professional bodies. (Link here but behind paywall)

Basically, a combination of parental peer pressure and the Establishment mean people won't listen to what she has to say. Rugby as it is played at school at present is not safe.

AIBU to think we aren't protecting our sons? Why are we allowing this compulsory sport to put at risk so much for our boys?

OP posts:
AddToBasket · 04/05/2015 12:14

She's an academic who specialises in Public Health. She was personally affected, but being 'wary' of what she's got to say sounds a bit like you don't want to hear it.

That's pretty much her point. Basically, parents don't want to hear what their children are risking.

OP posts:
bigredtractor · 04/05/2015 12:15

YABU - or more specifically, SIBU. There is a reason why Prof Pollock is a 'lone voice' - she will NOT engage with other organisations, research, governing bodies etc. and her findings have been dismantled by many more knowledgeable clinicians.

Her son was injured playing rugby - not seriously, certainly not a catastrophic head or spinal injury. That's really unfortunate but since then she has pursued an agenda against rugby.

I have personally seen hundreds of thousands invested in coach education, first aid, club / school cultures (trying to tackle the win-at-all-costs attitude) and mandatory safety courses for all coaches and teachers.

Irresponsible parenting is way off the mark I'm afraid - rugby has brilliant values that, IF coached well and enjoyed, can be really useful for teenagers and pre-teens. This sort of scare mongering is really frustrating to see (her, not the OP).

partialderivative · 04/05/2015 12:15

True - but should it be compulsory ?

That's a tough question, I doubt if many schools will have the staffing to offer many different team sports, even less individual sports such as tennis.

So, I do believe it should be compulsory, if only for a few weeks.

I have a horrible feeling that, given the option, many pupils would choose the least strenuous available.

Pupils do not spend that many years in secondary school, it is much harder to get into a sport after they have left. Exposure to a team game like rugby has a place in the national curriculum

SunnyBaudelaire · 04/05/2015 12:16

to be honest if we are going to stop our sons playing rugby then we should also stop boys and girls going horse riding.....and....and;....

AddToBasket · 04/05/2015 12:17

Please could you link to her findings being dismantled?

On this thread already people have said they know 'knowledgeable clinicians' who won't let their children play.

OP posts:
OrlandoWoolf · 04/05/2015 12:17

Don't get me started on cricket Grin

A ball being thrown at you. Quite fast. If you're lucky, you hit it.

Then someone has to catch it. The ball is heavy and if you don't catch it, it can hurt. A lot.

Anyone who stands close to the batter can get seriously hurt.

I suspect some sports pose a lot more risks than others. Rugby is one of them.

And gymnastics. Run at a vault and jump over it.

You'll probably realise I have a fear of getting injured. I hated most PE. Except swimming and cross country.

bigredtractor · 04/05/2015 12:19

P.S. daughters can play rugby too ;-)

AddToBasket · 04/05/2015 12:19

Sunny - to answer your point about riding. Lots of parents don't let their children showjump or hunt for reasons of safety. And they would loudly protest if the school demanded it of their children. But they stay quiet about rugby.

OP posts:
exLtEveDallasNoBollocks · 04/05/2015 12:19

My father was a professional rugby player. Neither of his sons played because of the injuries he received. Now none of the grandsons play either.

if rugby is to be played at schools, and taught by sports teachers with the barest understanding of the damage that can be caused, then protective head gear, chest plates and strapping should be compulsory.

My father had his knee caps replaced in his 30s, again in his 60s and now in his 80s despite the constant pain he is not considered a 'good bet' for further surgery. He has (very) mild brain damage, hearing loss and damage to every one of his joints. Broken noses, cracked cheekbones and cauliflower ears abound amongst all his friends and every single one of them has joint and cartilage issues.

I love rugby, my father watches it daily (much to my mothers disgust) but I don't think it should be played in schools - only in clubs with the understanding, training and specialist medical care immediately available.

SunnyBaudelaire · 04/05/2015 12:20

yes bigredtractor I know there is also women's rugby - but rugby is not widely played by girls in school is it? not even in Wales lol.

OrlandoWoolf · 04/05/2015 12:20

Just out of interest, how many people defending rugby have played it at school?

In a very previous life, I used to. Actually I had to. It was that kind of school. It can be a terrifying sport and "team" is a laugh. If you're crap, you get made to feel like crap.

The best players got all the plaudits, recognition in school etc. It's not a very inclusive game.

NickiFury · 04/05/2015 12:21

But where ARE all these fatties that prefer computer games to sport and activity because I don't know a single one and I know pretty well literally 100's of children and teenagers.

shewept · 04/05/2015 12:21

But kids need to get to school. Kids don't need to play rugby.

But they don't need to travel in cars. And they could be home schooled. My point is you can not avoid all risks. Its about judging risk and making a decision. A parent that decides rugby is an acceptable risk is not irresponsible.

StellaAlpina · 04/05/2015 12:21

Vault was my favourite apparatus Grin

I can barely swim though.

At my (Catholic) secondary school we girls did a term of (tag) rugby but weren't allowed to play cricket like the boys in case the ball hit us in the ovaries (this may just be what the older girls told me, it may well have just been that cricket is traditionally a boys sport)

SunnyBaudelaire · 04/05/2015 12:22

ah Nicki they are indoors so you never see them!

Littleturkish · 04/05/2015 12:22

What are the statistics on rugby being more dangerous than any other sport?

Has it factored in the higher frequency that rugby is played versus skiing, for example?

AddToBasket · 04/05/2015 12:23

About girls playing: I think this isn't compulsory in schools, also, I think it doesn't come with peer pressure, also the weight/speed risks are reduced. Hence, being less relevant here.

However, I do think there is an issue of sexism going on. Like some elemnets of society need boys to 'man up' and so we put them through this.

OP posts:
rookiemere · 04/05/2015 12:23

Orlando - they're using soft balls for cricket this term so hopefully my PFB will be ok!

DS is an assistant coach with DS's team. They receive very good training, particularly around what to do with head injuries. I may be less keen for DS to play when he is in his teens, but then the likely alternative is that he becomes one of those veggy flabby teens, so in those circumstances yes I'd rather he played rugby and ran a few risks.

SunnyBaudelaire · 04/05/2015 12:23

you might have a point there addtobasket

Stealthsquiggle · 04/05/2015 12:24

At a rugby-focussed school, the worst injury we have seen among DS's peers in the last 5 years was a broken collarbone (DS was the tackler and felt awful).

Within a week of the cricket season starting there is a child out with 9 stitches in his leg following an encouter with a teammates spikes. DS got similarly gashed at an athletics meet. A girl in my class broke her back vaulting over a horse in gym and has been in a wheelchair ever since..... I am sure the statistics in the study are real, but they don't reflect my experience to date.

Should schools and clubs pay proper attention to safety in how they teach rugby? Absolutely. Should we ban it or withdraw children from it? No. Apart from anything else, what next? The focus just moves to the next most dangerous sport?

bigredtractor · 04/05/2015 12:24

They're industry articles AddtoBasket - I'll try and search for them.

Some have been private correspondence / work stuff though so I can't link them! Its just frustrating that she gets sooooo much coverage versus the very measured counter arguments which are largely ignored by the media.

Reginafalangie · 04/05/2015 12:24

I chose to play it aged 9 -14. I started playing for the school ( and it wasn't tag back then) and later joined the local boys club.

Nobody was made to feel like crap. I was the only girl in both of the teams I played in and I was included and valued as part of the team. The area I lived and went to school in was/is a deprived area and the boys club especially put a lot of effort in to the local kids and ensured they felt included and valued. It also gave them somewhere to go and a different focus than twoking cars Grin

OrlandoWoolf · 04/05/2015 12:25

rookie

There are alternatives.
Running
Swimming
Cross country
Hockey
Basketball
Tennis
Football

Loads of sports where you run round and are active.

rookiemere · 04/05/2015 12:26

Nicki my nephew is one of those tubby computer loving teens.

He used to be fine due to playing a lot of football, but now he has more control over his diet and free time preferences, he has put on a huge amount of weight in a couple of years. He is also DS's idol, so anything that counterbalances that in my mind can't be all bad.

PanGalaticGargleBlaster · 04/05/2015 12:27

"....what with all the bottom grabbing and what not."

Sure he was playing rugby?