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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wear white to a wedding?

111 replies

umbongoumbongo · 22/04/2015 23:30

Am on a budget and have seen a broderie anglaise knee length dress that is understated and not 'wedding dressy' at all that would be wearable for other things as a summer dress. I could add a belt or sash to break up the colour along with bright accessories. Is it still considered a massive faux pas to wear white?

OP posts:
Judgementalbadgerface · 23/04/2015 14:15

It's interesting this is seen as a big deal still. my friend wore an ivory/gold knee length dress to my wedding and was actually mistaken for me by the caterers but I just thought it was funny. I wore the ivory bodice top of my dress with a dark purple pencil skirt and wrap to another wedding, checked out with a few mutual friends who thought it was fine, but now I'm wondering if everyone was Shock and Angry behind my back!

AlansLeftMoob · 23/04/2015 15:20

Lots of women wore white/cream/nude to my wedding. You know how I know this? I saw the photographs. On the day, I couldn't have told you who wore what. None of them were mistaken for the bride and none of them were wearing white shoes and veils or carrying flowers. Just wear the white dress and go for a different colour with your accessories - lime or purple or fuschia or whatever. If a bride spends her wedding day being annoyed about guests wearing white, her priorities are arseways.

I like that dress, OP. Pop a hot pink shrug over it, add a belt and a fascinator and you wouldn't look remotely bridal.

fedupdownhere · 23/04/2015 16:19

sizing seems ok so far and material was fine

Allstoppedup · 23/04/2015 16:21

At my sister's wedding the grooms sister and mother both wore lacy, white dresses.

You could obviously see they weren't the bride but if I'm totally honest I did think it was a bit of a dick move on their part, though I'm not sure why! - It's just been drilled in to me that its not the done thing!

Original poster
umbongoumbongo · 23/04/2015 16:39

This was the other option. Still understated and useable for other less dressy occasions. www.fatface.com/dresses/selborne-stripe-dress/invt/77793

OP posts:
HesterShaw · 23/04/2015 16:41

I never knew this until Mn. My MIL wore white to my SIL's wedding - I didn't hear any shocked gasps or snarky comments (and my SIL is definitely not one to seethe in silence about something).

HesterShaw · 23/04/2015 16:42

PS the Fat Face dress is lovely :)

Original poster
umbongoumbongo · 23/04/2015 16:45

Yes I think I will probably go for that Hester and there is a local branch so could actually go and try on. It is a shame about the other white one but I'm not one to cause an issue and would have to spend out on accessories anyway! Didn't realise how contentious the issue obviously is to some people.

OP posts:
0x530x610x750x630x79 · 23/04/2015 16:49

fat face, perfect

WhiteConverseSkinnyJeans · 23/04/2015 16:49

my friend wore white to my first wedding

it really pissed me off tbh

don't do it

blueshoes · 23/04/2015 17:25

As a bride or guest, I couldn't care less. Surprised so many people care. It is not as if it will look like a wedding dress.

Egog · 23/04/2015 17:44

I didn't give this a thought before my wedding, but was a bit Shock when DH's Aunt rocked up in a cream sheath dress, with cream shoes, cream lace gloves and a cream hat complete with face veil.

My dress was a plain cream sheath, with cream shoes and a birdcage veil... The pictures look like there are 2 brides!

Obviously I didn't say a thing (although my friends and sister were seething!) but I later found out that she was originally going to wear red accessories, but MIL talked her out of it, and into the cream. (That's a whole other thread, right there.)

So, no, don't wear anything that could be even marginally bridal, imo.

Allstoppedup · 23/04/2015 18:34

Ooh, the Fat Face one is lovely!

FryOneFatManic · 23/04/2015 18:50

It's a totally outdated tradition. And the tradition wasn't that old to start with.

I've got old photos of my grandparents at their wedding, and other family weddings of the time, and no-one is wearing white, not even the brides.

That's not even 100 years ago, so the idea that certain colours are a no-no is ridiculous

Droflove · 23/04/2015 19:59

Its just bad manners. If you are okay with people thinking you have bad manners, go ahead. But there is no way around it.

I personally wouldn't unless I added some serious colour with accessories and belts and little jacket. Even then, probably not. You can pick up a really nice suitable summery dress on ASOS and Boo Hoo for £15.....

Scichick · 23/04/2015 20:02

Yabu
I get married in August. If anyone is wearing white they will be getting changed

Original poster
umbongoumbongo · 23/04/2015 22:43

Blimey RTFT people. I've already chosen something else to wear and said so several times so please stop calling me rude. Rude would be someone not bothering to research the issue and turning up in whatever they would like regardless of any thought. Thank you to those who have given helpful input; will be ordering the Fatface dress as it matches with DP's ushers outfit for the one wedding and I will borrow or wear something really old for the other wedding.

OP posts:
janestheone · 24/04/2015 08:42

I wouldn't wear a white dress to a wedding. If you love the broderie anglaise dress have it dyed or do it yourself. My son is getting married in June and I planned a white jacket - is that OK? Bride will be in green and other MIL in dusty pink I am told.

GirlAnachronism · 24/04/2015 09:10

lots of lovely dresses here in the sale [http://www.joebrowns.co.uk/pp+outlet-dresses+ol-dr?contenta=MenuOT here]]

GirlAnachronism · 24/04/2015 09:11

here even

Trills · 24/04/2015 09:15

Last year I was at a wedding where a guest wore a white sparkly minidress.

The bride didn't notice but everybody else did!

(she has been a PITA at the hen do as well so we already had her down as an attention-seeker).

TaliZorahVasNormandy · 24/04/2015 09:19

My sister wore black to our brothers wedding, turned out it was an omen. Two years later they are divorced.

LaLaLaaaa · 24/04/2015 09:21

The fat face dress is lovely! I'm sure you'll look gorgeous Grin

Only1scoop · 24/04/2015 09:22

Just saw the f face one love it ??

Trills · 24/04/2015 09:23

I like the diagonal stripes on the Fat Face dress.

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