Derealization/Depersonalization

[spudholes]

I'm 25, had this since I was 11. It just won't go away. It appears out of the blue and for no specific reason and just makes me feel depressed and suicidal, numb. I want it gone. I want it to go away.

How does it manifest OP? I get this occasionally, oddly I got it this morning and it's disconcerting at best. I mostly am affected when I'm ill or anxious.

Yeah, I have a cold, I notice that often triggers it. Also bright lights, too much/little sleep. Change also.

I used to get this if faced with something that was very difficult to deal with emotionally; can remember it happening when I was a child too. I'm now much better at dealing with things after years of therapy; doesn't tend to happen any more

I feel so alone

do you have a therapist?
I've felt like that a long time along with other issues. Therapy helped me and during the roughest time medication got me through.
Now meditation keeps me on track, but I could not have gotten where I am without therapy.