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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

For a child though?!

86 replies

Janehillson · 07/04/2015 22:22

First Aibu despite lurking for ages. It's a trivial one.

My friend has an utterly beautiful 3 year old daughter, her only child. The kind of kid who is so pretty that she gets comments about her frequently. My friend is perfectly lovely, a wonderful person with her head firmly screwed on. You get the picture.

So, we meet for lunch and they walk in with matching Gucci bags, albeit her daughters is a miniature version of hers. She didn't buy it especially for her, it was hers from when she was a teen. I can't help but think its vulgar (obv didn't say this!). Friend is doing this in a v tongue in cheek way and thinks its quite comical but didn't mention it until I pointed it out. Surely this is off another planet behaviour. Admittedly I don't have kids so maybe ill change my mind when I do on this kind of thing?!!

OP posts:
TheWhiteRoad · 07/04/2015 22:38

So she gave her daughter an old handbag to match Mummy's?

Is it the fact that it's designer that's bothering you? Would you think it was vulgar if they were both from Next?

Or do you feel she's flaunting her wealth in a kind of 'I have so many designer bags I can afford to give them to my toddler to put grass in' way? I can sort of see where you're coming from if so. Though it doesn't sound like that was her intention at all.

msgrinch · 07/04/2015 22:39

I'm sure the child's mother will be able to keep an eye on it. The same way she wouldn't let a beloved toy get lost. Losing a bag and calling her vulgar don't really equate to the same thing though.

Philoslothy · 07/04/2015 22:39

My kids are ugly, they are fine with designer bags.

Original poster
Janehillson · 07/04/2015 22:40

Philoslothy that's not what I meant! Grin

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 07/04/2015 22:41

Pictish - that's not what I meant at all! You're twisting my words. But naturally beautiful children do attract attention.

Kids attract attention for all manner of reasons though - not just being attractive.

They can attract attention by being funny, loud, well mannered, badly behaved, or having an odd/different look about them.

Have a look at the adverts on TV and in magazines, not all the kids are 'beautiful' looking, yet they're still attracting attention.

usualsuspect333 · 07/04/2015 22:42

What a strange thread.

TwinkieTwinkle · 07/04/2015 22:42

YAB so U. Little girl gets a hand-me-down handbag that matches her mums, most wee girls' dream! Designer label is irrelevant. Your friend clearly understands the daftness of children being bought designer stuff, hence her laughing attitude. Is there possibly a hint of jealousy from you? A child having a designer handbag, yet you can't?

Salmotrutta · 07/04/2015 22:44

Isn't Gucci soooo last week?

Not sure what your point is really OP:-

Designer bags for small children?

Designer bags at all?

Mum and daughter matching?

Gileswithachainsaw · 07/04/2015 22:44

You have a serious problem. not only do you spend way to much time making adult assumptions about child beauty you seem to think they should be filthy dressed in rags and have no accessories ever just because she's too noticeable.

It's a bag.

msgrinch · 07/04/2015 22:44

twinkle.... exactly. Someone's jealous she can't have a gucci bag.

Treaclepot · 07/04/2015 22:44

I don't understand handbags at all. Not sure if that is relevant to this thread in anyway but why would anyone pay £100s for a bag. What's the point?

Treaclepot · 07/04/2015 22:46

Is it most 'wee girls dreams' though? What a weird world we live in.

Original poster
Janehillson · 07/04/2015 22:46

Ha I have plenty of my own. That's not my point. I wonder what the reaction would be if I had omitted the part about it being a hand me down! I admit defeat IABU

OP posts:
pictish · 07/04/2015 22:46

Well...but you made a point of how pretty she was, so I thought it was relevant to you, but couldn't see why. As if you think she gets enough attention as it is.

msgrinch · 07/04/2015 22:47

Oh of course you do. So they're not that vulgar then are they?

Original poster
Janehillson · 07/04/2015 22:49

I'm not 3!

OP posts:
msgrinch · 07/04/2015 22:51

I'm sure you pranced about in your mother's things once. why shouldn't your friends daughter? You may not be 3 but that's kinda what kids do. Copy mum/dad.

TwinkieTwinkle · 07/04/2015 22:52

Treacle Yes it probably is for the majority, hence putting 'most' in my comment. Children copy behaviour. Nothing wrong with saying that little girls would like a bag like their mum's, who is usually the most important female who they idolise. Or is that incredibly un-feminist and stereotyping? damn that human behaviour

BaronessEllaSaturday · 07/04/2015 22:53

My 3 year old loves to carry a bag, sometimes she takes her mr tumble spotty bag and sometimes she raids my wardrobe for one of mine, just so happens that the one that is the perfect size for her is a designer one. Would it be less vulgar to go out and buy one specifically for her that wasn't designer or let her use one I just don't use anymore because it doesn't fit my needs.

msgrinch · 07/04/2015 22:56

When we have brides trying their wedding dress on, usually (not always and not forced) their daughter will want to be like mummy. So we pop on a flower girl dress and tiara. Kids that age like to copy and "be like" their role model. There's nothing vulgar about it, it's natural and makes them happy.

sabrina00 · 07/04/2015 23:01

Ridiculous. A 3yo doesn't need a bloody handbag. Vain and stupid on the part of the mother.

keepsmiling2015 · 07/04/2015 23:02

She sounds hilarious in a fun way.

Why mention that the toddler was especially pretty? Are you a bit jealous. The aibu is weird.

Gileswithachainsaw · 07/04/2015 23:05

mine carry monster high and doc mcstuffins bags

Sandbrook · 07/04/2015 23:06

Cute. None of your business either

msgrinch · 07/04/2015 23:07

and here's the sock puppet.