HV has told me that my 20 month old DD is overweight. I'm at a loss

[Unappreciatedandfat]

I've always put in every effort to make sure she eats healthily, she loves fruit and veg and I make every meal from scratch, no junk etc. She has small portions and they fill her up easily. She has the very occasional treat and only drinks milk or water.

We live on a farm so she's a very active toddler (she's been walking since 11 months) and just generally loves being outside. I'm so disheartened because I really thought that I was setting her up for being fit and healthy. I've recently lost 3-4 stones in weight jus through doing more exercise.
I see my friends with their toddlers who are a similar age and the right weight and they're fed chips, crisps, chocolate and given fizzy drinks and are sat inside all day long watching TV. What the hell have I done so wrong?

Sorry 3/4 stones and I've just realised I put that way too bluntly, I really don't want to be mean, you have done fantastically well.

I think it's highly likely the HV either want really paying attention, or had duff scales. If I were you I'd go directly to the gp for her height and weight to be plotted again.

I was told my baby was slow at 6 weeks when he wouldn't lift his head off the floor. I was told not to carry him in a sling in case he died. At 5 months I was told I was overfeeding him because he sometimes brought tiny amounts of milk back up. Coincedentally this particular hv recorded his height wrong and tools me he was overweight.
At nine months we saw a different hv who couldn't get him to lay still on the board so refused to plot his height as it wouldn't be accurate. She also said we were doing everything right. It really seems to depend who you get on the day.

I think your dd is chunky but in a way that toddlers should be. She sounds healthy and active with a good diet. If you're really concerned see your gp.

I'm not seeing a fat child in those pics and if that was my child I wouldn't be worried. And for reference, I'm slim, my entire family are slim. So it's not that my 'perceptions' are distorted or anything.

Chunky at two is so different from chubby at 7 or 8, you know? I just don't think you can really worry about baby and toddler weights, as long as they're not eating crap - which it sounds as though yours definitely isn't!

Hello - I find the whole thing very confusing, what with the current emphasis on childhood obesity. But how can that apply to babies? My baby (12mnths) is very chunky and prob overweight if you looked at the charts. She does have a huge appetite and while I give her healthy homemade food (although with the occasional biscuit, which I should try and stop given her size!) I do find it difficult to know when to stop because I don't want to leave her hungry. My oldest daughter has slimmed down to a beanpole now she is 6 and on the go all the time. Anyway, I don't have any actual advice sorry, just wanted to let you know you weren't the only one struggling with this. I also wanted to say how gorgeous she looks even with a head out of shot and that it sounds lovely to live on a farm and go for walks around the sheep.

autumnroses - no I definitely want to scoop her up for a big cuddle. Working from home today with no children around to cuddle...

Yes she looks cute even without seeing her head. The farm walks and lovely food sound really wholesome!

She's a growing toddler and needs that extra weight for growth spurts and periods of illness. Don't worry about it, if you are feeding her healthy stuff. It won't mean she'll be an overweight child/adult. Children need body fat for growth and when they get sick. Percentiles are averages. If she walks a lot, then she may have more muscle than an average child and therefore be heavier.

The charts allow for babies to be chunky Chumpster, its only if a baby is way off the charts (like a 16kg 1 year old, if that was the case here) that it's a worry. Not everyone feeds their babies healthy, homemade food. An average 20 month old might weigh 11-12kg, a chunky but healthy one about 14kg, so 16kg would really be obese.

^^Sorry, but this really isn't the case in a 20 mo old. BMI is skewed by physical exercise building muscle in professional athletes, not small children.

I'd definitely want to re-measure her for starters. I remember HV misreading scales and then panicking DD had lost loads of weight, and my personal trainer once weighed and measured me to work out my BMI and I had to point out to him (obviously not good at converting between imperial and metric) that he'd put me down as 4 and a half foot or thereabouts, whereas in fact I'm 5'9".

I'd definitely go to the GP to discuss it as well.

Ah good old mumsnet. Because when it comes to girls being branded unnacceptably fat you really can't start young enough. Bravo!

Our paediatrician was overjoyed that my son was madly chunky at 10 weeks - she called him fatso - and was thrilled because it meant that he had more energy reserves to fight off the life threatening lung infection he had picked up.

He was very fat. Bloody good job too.

Scrawny 13yo now.

My kids have always been made of lead. Ds was the only one who was obviously fat. We have always had very sensible medical professionals who don't pay attention to height/ weight charts except to check that everything is moving in the right direction.

Your dd looks fine, op. Re-weigh and see if there is an obvious issue, otherwise I would just assume that you have a child of lead, like mine.

Decaff, childhood obesity effects boys too.

True Keturah and I do appreciate that. I merely said girls as the OP has a DD.

Negative body image effects both boys and girls, seemingly at younger and younger ages. It's very scary to me. It seems the more pressure there is to be the 'right' weight, the more overweight we become, as a nation and worldwide. Part of me wonders if we didn't have the pressure would we have the problem?

My nearly 5 year old son weighs 15.6kg and is 104cm tall, so yes I would agree with the HV that at the weigh measurements she took your daughter is overweight. She does also look overweight in some of the photos to me, sorry.

Also, no child is "supposed to be chunky". You are supposed to be able to see a childs ribs.

What I would do is (1) weigh and measure her again at home. (2) weigh and measure her again at home in a couple of months. If she is still massively disproportionate for weight and height then I would keep a food diary (exact and weighed) for a week and go to the GP. It is not worth stressing about at the moment, but it IS worth keeping an eye on. If her weight remains too much compared to her height, then you might need further help to help her keep her weight in check and stop further problems.

juniorcakeoff I've been under no illusion as to her being on the chunky side-I just thought it was pretty normal for a child of her age. It's not like we go on short walks, she has just been running around outside with her cousins! She's always running around.

I've just weighed her on my own scales (haven't done her length as she's not wanting to cooperate) she has weighed in at just over 12 kg, so that's between the 75th and 91st centile lines, so the scales must've been wrong.

I can see her ribs!!

She looks chunky but a lot of 1.5 year olds still are. My DS was a fat baby who was still chunky at your daughter's age even though he gained almost no weight between 9 and 18 months. By the time he was 3 he was very slender.

I think with large babies what matters is that at some point their weight stabilises so that their height catches up. Have a look at how her weight gain has been since she turned 1 and if there is a significant slowdown or even a flatting of her weight curve, then there is probably no need to worry. It gets concerning once they get to 3-4 and still carry a lot of baby fat - based on a completely unscientific sample of children I know, the ones who are still chubby at 4 are often really quite overweight at 10 :( (Invariably the reason is clear to everyone but the parents - too much snacking and inappropriate portion sizes).

Sorry, but the toddler in the pics does look overweight to me. Also, as a poster said above, several stones is not a little extra weight. Maybe increase exercise. Take her swimming etc.

If she's 12 kg then she's just average surely? DS at his first birthday was 82cm and about 12-13kg. Chunky but very active baby. It took him another 2 years to gain the next kilo though - he was 14kg at 3 years!

Decaff, children become obese because they are overfed on the wrong kinds of foods, due to a mixture of issues - availability and aggressive marketing of high fat/sugar foods, sedentary lifestyles, poverty, lack of knowledge - not because toddlers have a negative body image (not aimed at you OP as I think you're DD clearly isn't obese).

When you see very overweight 2 year olds drinking juice drinks or coke from baby bottles, whose siblings are obese and have had half their teeth removed by the age of 5, then I tend to think you are right that it can't start early enough if those children are to get the chance to be healthy.

Wish I hadn't posted now. I now have a fat toddler and am being ridiculed and pulled up on the fact that I've lost nearly 4 stones which highlights that I've changed my eating habits for the benefit of my child.