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AIBU?

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Original poster

The breakfast debate in our home.

62 replies

justbatteringon · 26/03/2015 07:53

When dp gets up he makes himself and our ds eggs and porridge every morning. I consider this their thing they do together.

I'm not a big fan of eggs and porridge I think it's a faff to make so when I get up with DS who's 2 btw I give him formula and toast maybe some cereal. Usually his dad is up about an hour later and they have their breakfast anyway.

But dear mners dp thinks I should also make eggs and porridge on my mornings aibu not to do this ? (It usually causes a few shouty words when I haven't)

OP posts:
WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes · 26/03/2015 07:56

Well, it's good to ring the changes, but I would say eggs and porridge is a healthier breakfast than toast and cereal. Shouldn'tbe a shouting matter though

AlternativeTentacles · 26/03/2015 07:57

Surely by giving him different breakfasts you are diversifying his diet which is a good thing?

But eggs AND porridge? Surely that is too much for breakfast. Or are the eggs in the porridge? Half a bowl of porridge is ample for me and I'm an adult. Formula and toast and cereal? Again - all 3?

Snozberry · 26/03/2015 07:59

Porridge and eggs is better than toast but that doesn’t mean he has to always, no matter what have porridge and eggs. Toast is fine. Why the fuck is he shouting at you about it? Tell him to wake up with DS if he cares that much.

SuburbanRhonda · 26/03/2015 08:00

I was th inking that, alternative.

And unless I've misread the OP it sounds like when the DP gets up late, the DS gets all five items for breakfast!

seriouslypeedoff · 26/03/2015 08:00

Does he think cereal and toast is unhealthy? On the face of it he is bu. But I suppose if he thinks you are feeding him unhealthy, he may not be happy about it. Can't see why its worth arguing over though.

gamerchick · 26/03/2015 08:01

Tell him he can do what he wants but he can't dictate what you do.

I couldn't be chewed cooking first thing and anybody trying to make me would get a mouthful.

seriouslypeedoff · 26/03/2015 08:02

He gets all of it? Wow!

ChipDip · 26/03/2015 08:03

That's quite a lot for breakfast.

AlpacaMyBags · 26/03/2015 08:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
justbatteringon · 26/03/2015 08:06

Yeah I agree it's healthier but to clarify dp makes it for them both when he gets up anyway so no matter what I make him he's getting eggs and porridge, the toast and cereal is just for something in his tummy until dp gets up.
He's quite a hungry toddler in the morning he'll usually have half a bowl of porridge and one scrambled egg they're separate btw. DS wouldn't be a big lunch eater to much playing to do so it's best to have a big breakfast.

I don't know why it's such a big deal to him DP is a bit of a feeder but he makes such a big deal about this.

OP posts:
Goldmandra · 26/03/2015 08:08

I don't think it's reasonable for one parent to lay down the law about what the other feeds their child within sensible bounds.

I would have something to say if DH started feeding our DCs ice cream or chocolate for breakfast but cereal and toast is perfectly reasonable.

Do you you have other battles for control or is it just about breakfast?

BTW, my DD2 has always taken most of her calories at breakfast and eaten like a bird for the rest of the day so those breakfasts don't seem at all unreasonable to me.

Original poster
justbatteringon · 26/03/2015 08:08

Ds also gets up at 5 so this food is during a 4 hour period and small portions.

OP posts:
GreenPetal94 · 26/03/2015 08:08

why are you upset your dh cooks breakfast, sounds fab to me

DoJo · 26/03/2015 08:09

It usually causes a few shouty words when I haven't

He actually shouts at you over what you choose to feed your children for breakfast? That sounds wearing if he does it every time you decide for yourself what to make your son for breakfast. Having the same breakfast every day isn't necessary - why does he think it is?

FenellaFellorick · 26/03/2015 08:09

I would say that if he's getting that food later anyway, it's actually sensible to only give something light and you could even switch to fruit or something. If you gave him eggs and porridge when you got up - would your partner give him them again when he did? You say that no matter what you make him, he'd get that. It would be ridiculous to make it in that case.

Original poster
justbatteringon · 26/03/2015 08:10

There were some small battles and some new ones most of them have sorted themselves out.

OP posts:
Original poster
justbatteringon · 26/03/2015 08:14

Oh no he wouldn't get it twice. actually he probably would he loves scrambled eggs so if he saw daddy eating them he'd want some too.

OP posts:
tumbletumble · 26/03/2015 08:15

YANBU. You and your DH need to have a consistent parenting approach - that does not mean both doing exactly the same thing. Your DH sounds like a PITA if this is such a big deal to him.

popalot · 26/03/2015 08:16

Carry on as you are and tell him he shouldn't shout at you for something so trivial. If he wants to go to the effort of making a cooked breakfast, he can, but it's something he's decided to do and you don't feel it's necessary. The boy eats his porridge and egg too, so what's the problem?

Original poster
justbatteringon · 26/03/2015 08:26

If I told dp is given our son fruit for breakfast is get even more of an earful. I think because ds likes what dp makes him for breakfast he always eats it all.
Dp thinks eggs are amazing I have to buy at least 45 eggs a week full of protein and all that jazz.
I really don't know why its so important to him usually dp does get up with the babies tbf.
Sorry I'm rambling now.

OP posts:
Kraggle · 26/03/2015 08:35

Is he maybe hoping to get a break from cooking eggs and porridge on the mornings you get up with ds and is annoyed to find he still has to make it maybe?

MrsFlannel · 26/03/2015 08:38

Too many eggs is bad for you anyway OP. Tell him to buzz off. I wouldn't allow ANYONE to shout at me for that!

FenellaFellorick · 26/03/2015 08:52

Tell him that if he is that desperate to ensure your son has eggs and porridge each and every day, he is more than welcome to be the one to get up each and every day to make it.

And to stop shouting at you like you're a naughty child, because you're an equal in the relationship, not a subordinate who needs telling off.

BestZebbie · 26/03/2015 08:56

Does he think that it is necessary for your DC to have eggs for breakfast (and porridge) to be healthy and so he sees you as slacking off a requirement for their care rather than him as having a special optional thing he likes to do for them? Because that would make him much less U, and you two would need to have a talk about the DC diet as a whole and decide together if his idea has something to it or not.

ragged · 26/03/2015 08:57

If your child is satisfied and it isn't junk food or causing an actual problem I can't understand any debate discussion shouting or earfuls. [confusion]