To ask "What have you done today to make you feel proud?"

[Salmotrutta]

I drew a line in the sand today.

I can't give any details but I'm secretly hugging myself.

Salmotrutta - thank you. But if your children were in either of our classes you would probably hate us for being really strict.

So to clarify. I'm proud because I let myself feel the pain and did not totally fall apart and I'm proud that I have a good friend I can fall apart with.

I didn't tell DS to 'drive carefully' when he told me he was going on a big drive. He's an adult and I don't want to be one of those mums who endlessly give motherly advice to adult DC.

and to everyone

Applied for a full time job for the first time in 14 years, after 2 breakdowns and debilitating anxiety & depression. I don't mind at all if I don't get it, just doing that is enough for now.

elephant - I am a teacher.

And my DC are al grown up.

And I was not a teacher when they were at school and always supported the school's decisions.

LayMeDown - I'm sorry about your Dad.

My parents are still with me but they are very elderly and I am scared about when they aren't here.

100redballoons - you Go girl!

Thanks Salmo
My Dad's death was very sudden and unexpected so I can't offer any advice about ageing parents (he was 63). What I would say is that that if I had my time again I would prioritise the time I could have spent with Dad. There's loads of things I think I could have done that he would have joined if I'd thought of it. Not even making a special effort just of I'd said we are going here come with us. He would have and loved it. But I never thought to do that. It's a huge regret.

Oh no, don't beat yourself up and regret things LayMe

You are grieving and you obviously loved him.

He will have known that you loved him.

Thanks Salmo Go you too!

Salmontrutta
Sorry I just said that two of the strictest teachers in the school picked up a boy crying and made it ok in the end.

LayMe

What would your dad say about you holding onto the regret? I'm sure he knew how much you loved him, and wouldn't want you to be sad for him. Try and remember the good times you did have together.

elephant - yes, I understand because you deserve them.

I don't quite know why I felt the need to post this thread.

But I think it was because I wasn't prepared to be quashed or silenced again.

So I am saying "Up yours" silently to the people who tried and failed to make me do something that I didn't have to do.

Layme I'm sorry for your loss. My parents were also in their 60s when they died. Yesterday sounds like a positive day for you, although sad. I used to feel 'better' after I'd been able to have a good cry. Not that it solved everything but it always felt right to be able to let it out.

The older I've got the more little 'good deeds' I do.

God that sounds very Maria Von Trapp!

I mean helping people with luggage on the tube or giving up my seat, actively asking tourists if they need help (work and live in central London), spending time with a member of my staff (at work - I don't live in Downton Abbey) to chat through something personal or telling them to go home early if they are having a hard time, driving my teenage kids' friends home even though they don't need me to, giving my next door neighbour surplus milk!

Nothing yet, but have resolved to make today all about DS and less about me.

I am always busy through the week and everything has to be done to fit round my schedule, so today we are follwing DS' agenda

I finally got back to my 2 full days a week at work after a phased return. I had a tfmr in January and have struggled.

I also put my big girl pants on and went to congratulate my pregnant colleague on her pregnancy after just finding out (she was worried to tell me)

2 big steps for me. It's 2 months yesterday since my baby died, 2 months tmrw since she was born.

Little steps.

Yesterday I was accepted on a degree course to start in September......I'm 45 and left school with no qualifications. I'm grinning., things like this don't happen to me.

I got congratulated by one of the consultants at work for bringing it to his attention that a patient had been complaining of shortness of breath after starting on a certain medication. I am non clinical yet he was seen in clinic by a doctor 6 weeks ago and the notes clearly state that he complained about it then and nothing was done. I brought it to the attention of the consultant who took it very seriously and has changed the medication. Go me

Kitty

So sorry.

Passed an exam with 93%

Nothing. I have very low self esteem and find the idea of being 'proud' of myself very uncomfortable.

Jack - I'm sorry to read that.
Small triumphs are things to be proud of so even if it's just being able to say to yourself "Well done me, I baked a brilliant cake/did a good deed/ paid someone a compliment/passed my driving test" - nothing wrong with feeling proud of an achievement!

And a big congratulations to Hooley and Well Done U2TheEdge!!

I put DS down for a nap without breastfeeding him to sleep. It's something I assumed I couldn't do because I had never tried before. It was surprising easy.