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AIBU?

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Original poster

Its perfectly acceptable to be rude to religous people...

999 replies

startrek90 · 20/03/2015 15:32

Definately going to get flamed here but oh well.

I get the feeling that this is perfectly acceptable to be rude about religous people. From reading the threads on this forum, and my experiences in RL, the amount of rudeness and sometimes plain nastiness is awful.

I am religous. I don't care if people are not, if they go to church or how they live their own lives or raise their children. As far as I am concerned as long as you obey the law, do what you want.

So far I have seen people imply that all religous people are closing their childrens mind, are ignorant, bigots.... its horrible!

I don't deny that there are people who are that way and use religion as an excuse.... but quite frankly you can be ignorant and rude without religion.

I am being unreasonable to be offended, but it really bothers me that its culturally acceptable to be rude to and about people of faith. You wouldn't do it to someone from a different culture or race would you? I have never bothered anyone with my faith so please stop taking it as an insult!

(Just venting, been lambasted in RL for daring to buy my son a Noahs ark toy. I thought it was cute with all the animals etc... but apparently I am raising him to be ignorant, bigoted and stupid. He will hate gay people and women and generally be a horrible person.....apparently grrr Angry )

OP posts:
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6
pointythings · 20/03/2015 19:37

I would never be rude to anyone on the grounds of their beliefs. However, if they say things I disagree with - arguing against marriage equality, for instance - I will argue with them. Politely. But without any actual respect for their position, because they are wrong.

Rudeness is never acceptable, but it happens on both sides of the fence. The one that gets me, as pp have said, is the 'oh the poor atheists, they don't know God, how miserable their lives must be...' The few times I've been in a Church (weddings, funerals and school dos) it's come up most times. Gets right on my wick.

maddening · 20/03/2015 19:39

If it is a general comment about their own beliefs then that is not offensive - they have as much right as you to say what you believe - you can say your God exists and in doing so infer that every other belief is wrong and I can say that I don't believe in organised religion.

whilst I understand faith to be different to organised religion it is this organised controlling of faith in order to instil a certain order which inflicts it's rules upon society to maintain a certain order usually to the advantage of a particular set of people that I disagree with not the personal faith with which people seek to give and understand meanings to our existence and to live a certain way - I just don't think we need religion as a means to control anymore with government frameworks to maintain order.

However discrimination and harassment based on your religion is wrong.

Caff2 · 20/03/2015 20:18

I have a faith, quite a strong one. My partner of 16 years and father of my children doesn't. We seem to rub along and respect each other and be nice to our children. Sad to hear some on here would automatically disrespect me because of my faith. Ah well. You might know me and not know you should be disrespecting me since I don't talk about my faith at work or in the shops etc.

whatsthatcomingoverthehill · 20/03/2015 21:11

It is interesting the number of people who see science as being the opposite of religion. It's just not how I view things at all. And that's partly why I sometimes get annoyed with the likes of Dawkins, because they are setting up a straw man to dismiss all religion with.

ErrolTheDragon · 20/03/2015 21:12

Sad to hear some on here would automatically disrespect me because of my faith.

caff - yes it is sad - though I think I only noticed one person doign that on this thread, maybe more but its a minority.

maid - some of us got where you were coming from ... actually I nearly used that phrase myself before you got to it in similar vein.

LeSaor · 20/03/2015 21:32

I don't trust theists because they don't inhabit the world of reality. If you ask theists if they'd kill someone if God told them to, many of them will say yes. Many of them genuinely walk around being "nice people" whilst believing that you are going to be tortured in the fires of hell for all eternity. That's terrifying.

MaidOfStars · 20/03/2015 21:34

maid - some of us got where you were coming from

Haven't heard that for a while GrinGrinGrin

Catzeyess · 20/03/2015 21:42

Ultimately anyone who judges people based on stuff like belief is not really worth associating with. How people behave is far more important that what belief system they belong to.

SOME people are just mean/superior/arrogant and think they are right and others are wrong and SOME people are nice and treat people well and are genuinely trying to live well. That goes for pretty much any belief system from religion to veganism to aliens to conspiracy theories or whatever you can think of.

MaidOfStars · 20/03/2015 21:42

Caff I don't automatically disrespect anyone because of their faith. I do, however, put them in a box that says 'Not like me'. I don't mean to say that my box is any better. But for me, people from the two different boxes are incompatible in the very nature of who they are and how they approach life. Religion is a dealbreaker in a relationship, not because of religion itself or a deep-seated distrust in authority or whatever, but because it represents a philosophy - faith without evidence - that I simply can't get along with.

Do I disrespect someone? No. Am I faintly cynical abou tthem? Maybe. Am I friends with religious people? Of course. Did I marry one? Fuck no.

Postexpatlimbo · 20/03/2015 21:45

Maid- you put it brilliantly!

In my experience, most religious people are far less tolerance of atheists/agnostics than vice versa. And presume a certain superior right to express their belief at great length to me as if i dont get it.

Marshy · 20/03/2015 21:47

maid totally with you on all of that especially the deal breaker. I don't know how anyone can can be in a relationship with someone when they aren't on the same square with this

Fromparistoberlin73 · 20/03/2015 22:36

Yanbu

Also religious also very taken aback . It's ok to have an opinion but the nastiness

Well said op

BallsforEarrings · 20/03/2015 22:56

YANBU I had a huge argument on here about this! Although I have no particular faith in any religion myself I will defend to the last other peoples' right to such without ridicule!

I was party to a thread whereby the majority resorted to 'mean girls' tactics to deride anyone of faith and I objected, I almost reported it, I found it to be so obnoxious!

Hakluyt · 20/03/2015 23:23

People are of course entitled to hold whatever faith they want to. What they are not entitled to do is impose it on others or expect special treatment because of it. Sadly Christians in this country are inclined to do both.

whatsthatcomingoverthehill · 21/03/2015 02:23

I think you are missing a 'some' from that comment Hakluyt.

differentnameforthis · 21/03/2015 03:22

I think it is acceptable to be rude to some religious people, because "brainwashing" IS exactly what they do!

For example, there is a church group in the US that believes children can be cured of Autism using BLEACH (within a mixture) enemas. Because autism is caused by parasites that mate within their host during the full moon.

The people they sucked in share photos of these 'parasites' which are actually no more the the lining of their children's intestines due to the bleach burning it off. They also advocate drinking the solution.

When a concerned parent asks the 'designers' of this method for advice because their child is throwing up, shitting all day, they are told to carry on because it's the parasites acting crazy because of the "protocol" and not to see their dr/disregard what the dr says, as all those who disagree with their methods are trolls.

By the way, they sell the 'special' drops that you mix with water & another 'carrier acid (usually orange juice)

So yeah, I'll be rude about them.

Iflyaway · 21/03/2015 03:33

I don't care what religion/non-religion people are, just as long as they don't try to impose their views on me..

Then I get irate and maybe be rude feisty.

I grew up in Northern Ireland. I hate all that shit. People ramming their views down your throat. And now the religious hatred has spread around the world (IS etc.).

Give us a break FFS!

spidey66 · 21/03/2015 05:00

I was brought up Catholic, went to Catholic schools, Mass on Sundays the works.

As an adult, I don't identify with any religion at all. My choice.

I don't have a problem with those who quietly follow a religion and can see how it can help people. My grandad, for instance, found Catholicism a help when he was coming to the end of his life, as he had a quiet but strong belief in the after life. I work as a mental health nurse, in a part of London with a high number of Muslims. If someone's depressed with suicidal thoughts, we have to look for protective factors against suicide. The Koran preaches that suicide is wrong so this often stops Muslims from acting on these thoughts.

Having said that, I'm not happy with those who are extreme in their beliefs and who use it as a reason for hatred, war etc. My husband comes from Northern Ireland and he dislikes religion because of the Troubles that occured there as a result of religion. Like most people, (including the majority of Muslims) I dislike the power of ISIS etc.

I'm also not keen on those people who attempt to convert others to their religion. There's a part of my High Street designated as a Free Speech (think a smaller version of Speakers Corner) and there's a couple of groups there attempting to convert others. They can be very forceful in their approach.

There's a Christian group which are quite prominent in my area called UKCG who are frequently collecting money, especially at Christmas, when they don Santa hats, sing Christmas songs and wave buckets at people. I live in Haringey, and the UKCG were criticised during the Victoria Climbie case for trying to 'exorcise' the poor kids 'demons' shortly before she died. She was a small child ffs. I would not donate to them at all, not even small change, as I've strong doubts as to what that small change is going on, but am happy to donate to other religious organisations like the Salvation Army, knowing that my small change is actually going to help homeless people etc.

freelanceconundrum · 21/03/2015 05:24

I do judge people who believe in god and immediately lower my expectations of their critical think and intellect. If I meet someone who is fun or interesting and then discover that they have a faith my heart sinks.

CheerfulYank · 21/03/2015 05:38

I'll go cry in my tea freelance :o

Whoishillgirl · 21/03/2015 08:03

Why does your heart sink if you meet an interesting person of faith Freelance? Is it because your critical thinking and intellect are too impoverished to cope with data that doesn't fit your existing theory?

Catzeyess · 21/03/2015 08:10

Haha whoishgirl Grin

Some serious conformation bias there freelance maybe you should be less arrogant about your own beliefs and you might find some more interesting people to be friends with.

thegreenheartofmanyroundabouts · 21/03/2015 08:51

On mumsnet it seems to go like this:

Some people of faith are fundamentalists,
Therefore I will treat all people of faith as fundamentalists,
As result I can dismiss all people of faith as fundamentalists and sneer, be rude, dismiss etc.

Of course some people of faith are fundamentalists. I've had debates online and in person with the Christian variety who struggle to cope with the fact that I am a woman in leadership in the church. But the vast majority of Christians in the UK are not fundamentalists.

It is very sad that people like freelance judge their expectations of my intellect and critical thinking on my faith. Thankfully the organisations that have awarded my degrees do not share that prejudice.

Koalafications · 21/03/2015 08:59

I think it is interesting that Christianity (mainly Catholics and CofE) comes under attack on MN and is fair game but I don't seem to see as much about JW's etc or Muslims/Hindus/Sikhs etc. They aren't 'fsir game' it seems?

Koalafications · 21/03/2015 09:00

*fair