to just walk away from a brewing row on here, with a "fuck OFF"?

[BluebellBean]

Poster asks for advice re child in her dd's class who is struggling and can get violent. Posters advise. Of COURSE an "ADHD isn't real" poster comes along

I am too tired to bloody argue and try to explain and educate this idiot.

Feel a bit like I'm copping out but experience has shown that some fools will never learn

for me I 100% believe in AHD, and I have alot of compassion for the parents that are battling with it.

for me the grey area tends to be children living with abuse, neglect and piss poor parenting. They sadly are often the ones to have "challenging behaviour", and these are the children who might be misdiagnosed

This is very sad as (a) it detracts from reality and (b) its not the right solution. the solution of course is far more complex

I hope this makes sense??

I don't believe its that much of a grey area myself. Kids who are living with abuse, neglect etc Can often tick all the boxes for RAD, AD or conduct disorder, if the child has had any early intervention from childrens social care I do think these disorders should automatically be explored before any other sydromes or disorders.

Also I do believe that in some families a child with challenging behaviour can then cause parents to neglect, abuse etc due to the stress of living with someone like that, its not easy and it does push you right to your limit.

If you don't feel strong and ready to fight (for services), or if you've asked for help repeatedly but nones given, imo youre more likely to become apathetic/neglectful/abusive because you feel the finger is being pointed at you as the parent than the behaviour of your child....like your dammed if you do and dammed if you don't, so why bother when whatever you do is not having any effect/your child is viewed as the naughty child regardless.

smelly

you have a point, its almost to sad to even contemplate that in such hellish environments the children with AHD get even more abused and singled out. I think I read something like this about Daniel P

I dont know, I do feel that some environments are just shitty for a child regardless

Its hard

Smelly - your point is well stated.

My DD carries "ADHD - inattentive type" among her litany of diagnoses. I would love to say it is because of poor parenting, because with time and guidance, my parenting and her behaviour would both improve. In fact, there was a time I sorely wanted to be blamed for her challenges so I could fix myself and subsequently fix her.

Sadly, her ADHD is a sequela of the multiple strokes she has had that have decimated her frontal lobe (and by extension, executive function and impulse control), her epileptic encephalopathy and the effects of the medication that we use to try unsuccessfully to control her seizures.

ADHD is tough to understand for those who don't have intimate contact with those who deal with it. Therefore, it must be imaginary - and the children, naughty.

Adults who deal with it are making excuses, too, y'know. (Sarcasm intended)

Those of you who have stated I shouldn't have started this thread are absolutely right. I shouldn't have. I was tired, I was angry. Not a good combo. I stand by my views about ADHD and the views that some people hold. I'm glad it's turned into a thread where people can present fact to try to show others where they are wrong in their views. My ds2 attends a special school. I fought tooth and nail to get him in there. I thank my lucky stars every day.