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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

School uniform

80 replies

notnaice · 12/03/2015 09:28

Yet again our school is talking about clamping down on uniform.

They issue warnings that students will be sent home if skirts are too short etc, some people buy the correct style/length. The school tries to enforce it, other parents refuse to cooperate and also moan on facebook etc, leaving the kids whose parents try to cooperate, looking uncool or parents out of pocket, when they too end up going back to non regulation bits of uniform.

Aibu to think, I'm not going to bother trying to send my kids in the correct uniform if they don't actually enforce it, as they say they will, when parental backlash makes it difficult for them?
We live in a naice area and this is one of the best schools in the city by the way. So it's parents thinking their little johnny/Joanna should be allowed to express themselves rather than any other reason.

OP posts:

SunnyBaudelaire · 12/03/2015 09:29

sorry I am not sure what your point is.
Could you clarify?

Seriouslyffs · 12/03/2015 09:30

YANBU at all. Uniform is great if everyone is singing from the same song sheet and a PITA if it won't be enforced and you're left shelling out and being the bad cop.

Floggingmolly · 12/03/2015 09:30

Parental backlash?

OddBodkins · 12/03/2015 09:32

I cannot stand school uniform. DD wears it but thankfully her school are sensible and have chosen something widely available and easy to wash/look after. We don't have school uniform at the school where I teach and I'd say we have about 2 problems a year with children wearing inappropriate/impractical clothes.

SunnyBaudelaire · 12/03/2015 09:32

or is it just to make the point that your children go to 'the best' school and that you are superior to the other parents? or what?

Original poster

notnaice · 12/03/2015 09:43

No I don't want to fork out loads of money and make my children wear "uncool" uniform if the school are not going to enforce it. That's not fair on my pocket or my kids. So aibu to just ignore the new clampdown?

OP posts:

SunnyBaudelaire · 12/03/2015 09:44

so how would this clampdown mean that you have to 'fork out loads of money'?

hennybeans · 12/03/2015 09:45

I would be one of those parents who would enforce the school uniform rules with my DC so I can understand your frustration with other parents and the school flouting the rules.

I would still make my DC follow the rules and I would keep on at the school for enforcing them also. What more can you do? I think following school uniform rules are preparation for adulthood. My DH couldn't show up to work unshaven, in jeans, with messy hair, dirty shoes, etc. Many adults have to wear an actual uniform for work- can you imagine a nurse turning up to work having hemmed her dress well above her knees, or a bus driver wearing a hoodie over his uniform, or turning up to a job interview in trackie bottoms?

Parents who don't make their DC follow uniform rules are telling them that they are more important than everyone else and the real world does not work like that. I think you are not doing your own DC any favours by letting them ignore the rules just because others are.

Sallyingforth · 12/03/2015 09:45

Sounds like the school are trying to do the right thing but are frightened to enforce it because they don't want to be the next school pilloried in the Mail for sending badly dressed kids home.

Icimoi · 12/03/2015 09:48

I really think our obsession with uniform is ridiculous. I hate to think about the amount of teaching time that gets wasted with teachers trying to enforce pointless uniform rules. None of it affects how children learn.

Original poster

notnaice · 12/03/2015 09:49

By buying the longer skirts/wider trousers and regulation shoes. I don't mind doing this if everyone else will. But if the school don't enforce it, then eventually all the kids revert back to skin tight trousers, short skirts and "wrong" shoes. My kids then understandably want to do the same. So I've wasted my money. Or my kids feel upset because they are forced to continue wearing the uncool uniform rather than the cool one.

OP posts:

SunnyBaudelaire · 12/03/2015 09:50

yes I know what you mean, you think well why should i bother when nobody else does

lemonhope · 12/03/2015 09:51

I send mine in uniform but they often customise it themselves ie roll up skirt, wear v neck jumper without blouse. If the school tell them off then fine. I don't see it as my problem - my job is to supply the correct kit and help make sure it is clean. Couldn't care less what they do to it once they are out of the house apart from lose it

lemonhope · 12/03/2015 09:52

we have to buy our uniform from the school shop though so skirt length predetermined.

I think hard if you are told to buy 'a navy skirt' then the school gets mardy because its not the 'correct' navy skirt.

samithesausage · 12/03/2015 09:53

When I was at school I fantasised about having jogging bottoms, t-shirts and sweat shirts as a school uniform. No stick about your skirt being at an uncool length, teachers constantly making you re-do your tie. Urgh! Yanbu!

SunnyBaudelaire · 12/03/2015 09:53

and yes icimoi I totally agree.
The HT at DD's school started on her the other day, she was wearing a thin hoodie under the school sweatshirt, and he started that typical 'shaming' conversation with her, you know the one that goes,

"well minisunny, 1500 OTHER pupils have on the correct uniform, why do you think that YOU are different?!

When she pointed out to him that this was patently not the case, he got rather irate and threatened to suspend her!

Waitingonasunnyday · 12/03/2015 09:55

Do you have old uniform left from the last clampdown? I'd buy the least amount, and cheapest, 'correct uniform', and go along with it for the first week, then see how it goes.

Kittymum03 · 12/03/2015 09:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Gileswithachainsaw · 12/03/2015 09:58

I know what you mean.

i was that girl in.secondary. The one who had the JL official uniform. The one with the most unflattering cuts and fits.

only to discover everyone else got their skirts from next or new look and wore sweaters instead of those awful scratchy v necks. and they all likes so much nicer.

embarrassing big time. and my parents had to use store cards to afford it.

lemonhope · 12/03/2015 09:58

I love uniform

so easy to find stuff

no competition about clothes (girls school)

The skirt cost me £50 in 2011 and is still going strong (handed down to dd2)

so good value for money imo

lemonhope · 12/03/2015 09:59

but i mean proper uniform ie from school shop
buying stuff from New Look doesn't count as then you get the competitive element

hennybeans · 12/03/2015 10:04

But Sunny, your DD obviously did think she was different than the other 1500 students who all managed to wear the correct uniform. Surely she understands what is allowed/ not allowed so why waste the HT time? The school has a rule, follow it!
Now if someone wants to change the school rules to no uniform, fine, but go through the proper channels. As long as the school has a uniform rule, just follow it. Why should a HT have to spend their time arguing with someone over a jumper when clearly they are in the wrong?

RufusTheReindeer · 12/03/2015 10:06

Both boys wear the correct uniform

Dd wore the correct uniform in year 7...I think I can quite safely say that she was the only girl in the school to do so

Everyone else's skirts were so short it made dd look like she came from a deeply religious family...or 1805!!

She now wears skinny trousers, non regulation...she gets told off it's her problem

SunnyBaudelaire · 12/03/2015 10:10

henny I think the claim that the other 1499 pupils were all in correct uniform was just a little far fetched don't you?
And if an HT wants to waste his time shouting at girls about their blouses, then I guess that is his problem.

balletgirlmum · 12/03/2015 10:11

It might help at dds school if you could actually buy knee length skirts.

The official skit comes in two lengths. Dds size even the longest length skins her bottom so we went up a waist size to get a Longer length which is still mid thigh.

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