to laugh at this second-hand wedding drama?

[kitchentableagain]

It's second hand because it's actually happening to someone I know vaguely on FB who is in America.

She is getting married! And man, does everybody need to know about it! So far she's had:

An engagement shower (which seemed to be a party just for her thrown by her mother)

An engagement party (for the couple and potential invites to the wedding)

A wedding shower (same again?)

A bachelorette party (hen do)

Sent out save the dates (which I'd never heard of before her fb post about "looking out for them"), invitations, RSVP cards. And on and on.

Many many public dramas on the way, including rants about the fact that some people RSVP'd "sorry I can't attend" AFTER getting their save the date cards - she sent the save the dates SEVENTEEN MONTHS before the wedding. I'm sure most people had lost them by the time the correct year rolled around!

Anyway the wedding is this weekend (yay! An end to it all!). This week's FB drama is that people are cancelling last minute. She posted a screen grab of a text convo today though that has had me scraping my chin all day (my jaw is on the floor). It said:

Friend: Wanted to warn you hun, I won't be able to make it on Saturday. I'm so sorry. I'll call you tonight.
Bride: You know what, DON'T call me. You're the second to do this. So sick of selfish people wrecking my special day.
Friend: Mum died this morning.

Bride is on FB asking her friend list AIBU to think that "if her mum died on Monday then she could totally attend a wedding on Saturday".

Amazing.

And before anyone says it, yes I know I should unfollow/unfriend but I am shamefully addicted to this stuff...

bubleymummy I definitely wouldn't, but then I wouldn't marry this guy anyway, every photo I've seen (all via her feed) of him has something dead in it that he just shot! Often with vile saccharine sentiments like "who knows how to bring home the bacon?" (h2b sat on dead hog) or "my dear fiance" (h2b holding up head of dead deer with it's tongue hanging out). Gross. Maybe he'll bring a fresh corpse to the wedding for the photo ops...

What a dignified post from her friend.

What a wanker she is!!

I was once involved in a wedding that ran and ran and ran. Changing the order/type of events slightly, because a couple of them were fairly recognisable if anyone involved is on here, but there was:

The surprise engagement announcement get-together
The engagement party
The engagement drinks for people who couldn't make the engagement party
The stag weekend
The hen weekend
The joint stag and hen weekend
The pre-rehearsal drinks
The rehearsal dinner
The breakfast planning meeting
The wedding
The reception
The post-wedding brunch
The one-month anniversary party
The post-wedding reunion (overseas)
The wedding photo reveal get-together
The one year anniversary party
The one year reunion of the post-wedding reunion gang

That was an awful lot of my life that I will never get back.

I am never going to be able to order a cocktail again without thinking of this thread

Do you think the menu for the canapes and champagne will now look like this?
Champagne
Cocktail sausages
Cheese cubes on cocktail sticks
Blinis

What did people like that do before Facebook?

Kungfu, was there not a "Thank fuck they divorced" party?

With a revelation of the COCKTAIL type this could turn into an awesome cancellation and some sort of I dumped the bloody hunter shower.

(mean of me. But perhaps her h2b is trying to scupper this one!)

Wow I cannot believe this! Still laughing over the aunt's cocktail update though

Kungfu, was there not a "Thank fuck they divorced" party?

Go auntie !!!!!

What an utterly bat shit crazy fucknugget bridezilla is. I'd have gone round there and have pulled her out of her house and demanded an apology if I'd been her friend.

And the husband to be ? Brilliant. No more than she deserves. Do keep us updated. Wonder if she will go ahead with the wedding ? I bet she does. Won't be able to give up the attention I expect.

If H2B is trying to scupper it, he may have cottoned on to the fact he is about to marry the future Mrs Batshit.

Won't be able to give up the attention I expect.

Then it'll be about the divorce and how much a shit he is and people will be telling her that he didnt deserve her.

Marking my place, bridezilla plus Facebook drama equals much fun. What she did was abhorrent though. I will take the bet that what she did will end up on buzzfeed or the likes! Public shaming is the only way to deal with these types of people.

Can't believe people think that others give that much of a fuck about their wedding.

Threads like this make me so happy. I'm sure it's wrong to take such pleasure in laughing at bridezilla, but I'm willing to live with it.

I think this is why I'm not on FB to begin with. But I do LOVE a good FB 'contretemps'. And this one is just lovely and has everything I could possibly want!!!

I feel so sorry for the friend who lost her mum. And the poor thing actually felt she had to apologize to the fucking (and I NEVER use this word) cunt.

Please, please, if you don't want to keep up the blow by blow, promise you'll come back with the wedding info. I'm sure it will be vastly entertaining.

Tali - not so far!

I forgot, there was also a wedding 'product.' I can't say what it was, as it would definitely be recognised, but a family member of the bride worked in a particular industry and produced a bride and groom 'branded' product for the wedding. Some of them were left over, and were used at some of the later events.

Several friends have said before today "oh my bridezilla, what will you do when the wedding is over?" and she always responds "enjoy the honeymoon, produce an heir (i know yak!) and plan the one year vow renewal!"

I really don't think she's joking. And I really don't get a one year vow renewal! If you cannot stick to wedding vows for more than a year without renewing them then don't get married!

Also not place marking

Please do tell us bridezilla's name, she needs supportive overseas friends who would even pay good money to take the places of those inconsiderate people who dare to cancel last minute!

yes, you guessed it. Place marking.

One year vow renewal!!! The groom had a BJ from a stripper at his stag do. Will they be celebrating that anniversary on a yearly basis?

okay, i see that the poor friend has posted a dignified response :( , but i think you need to do this:

post on the thread about the meal that she could upgrade someone else to have the absent friend's meal.
and
start a new thread on her wall wishing her the best for the weekend and that you neeeeeed to have regular updates about the wedding weekend

that way you can guarantee you'll have plenty of drama to report back with.