to laugh at this second-hand wedding drama?

[kitchentableagain]

It's second hand because it's actually happening to someone I know vaguely on FB who is in America.

She is getting married! And man, does everybody need to know about it! So far she's had:

An engagement shower (which seemed to be a party just for her thrown by her mother)

An engagement party (for the couple and potential invites to the wedding)

A wedding shower (same again?)

A bachelorette party (hen do)

Sent out save the dates (which I'd never heard of before her fb post about "looking out for them"), invitations, RSVP cards. And on and on.

Many many public dramas on the way, including rants about the fact that some people RSVP'd "sorry I can't attend" AFTER getting their save the date cards - she sent the save the dates SEVENTEEN MONTHS before the wedding. I'm sure most people had lost them by the time the correct year rolled around!

Anyway the wedding is this weekend (yay! An end to it all!). This week's FB drama is that people are cancelling last minute. She posted a screen grab of a text convo today though that has had me scraping my chin all day (my jaw is on the floor). It said:

Friend: Wanted to warn you hun, I won't be able to make it on Saturday. I'm so sorry. I'll call you tonight.
Bride: You know what, DON'T call me. You're the second to do this. So sick of selfish people wrecking my special day.
Friend: Mum died this morning.

Bride is on FB asking her friend list AIBU to think that "if her mum died on Monday then she could totally attend a wedding on Saturday".

Amazing.

And before anyone says it, yes I know I should unfollow/unfriend but I am shamefully addicted to this stuff...

Bride is on FB asking her friend list AIBU to think that "if her mum died on Monday then she could totally attend a wedding on Saturday"

Fuck me. What a peach!

"What I always wonder is what must be going through her partner's head"

"Help meeee!" I suspect

I got a heap of attitude from DH's family for not attending the evening do only of a wedding 400 miles from our home because my mum was in the end stages of terminal cancer. She actually died the night of the wedding, I was with her, as I wanted to be, but they all still seem to think we should have gone to the wedding party instead.

People are fucknuts.

Oh I'm sure the bride herself will be posting live fb updates.

Two weeks ago the drama was that her cousin eloped (as in her and BF went to the courthouse or city hall or whatever the American version of the registry office is) and got married, witnessed by a stranger. I'm sure she definitely definitely wasn't inspired by the bride's crazy wedding saga in any way in this decision

Anyway when said cousin got back her mother, in a retrospective salvage operation (come to think of it, maybe there is wedding bonkersness in every generation of this family), having been denied the joy of foisting a massive wedding on the cousin, designed, ordered and sent out wedding announcement cards to the billion people she felt needed to know. Cue our bridezilla having a massive fit at her thunder being stolen and "sharing the anniversary month" (i mean literally nobody should be getting married the same MONTH, right?). And the lone voice on her thread about it to say "get a grip" was a distant relative who is a "jealous bitch" because she "had to get married with a toddler on her hip like a skank".

As for hubby to be, he's in the military, so I wonder if he reads half this stuff. His mum is ALL OVER her page enabling her though.

Also for the live updates...it's a three day affair! Friday morning there is a rehearsal breakfast, Friday evening there is a rehearsal dinner, Saturday morning there is a wedding breakfast, then the ceremony with vows, then a champagne and canapes thing while she gets her forty million photographs taken, then cocktails, then sit down dinner, then dancing etc. THEN on Sunday there is a wedding brunch for the out of towner guests who didn't flee at an earlier opportunity and the wedding party.

So she's gonna need some serious stamina to keep up this level of upset and drama through all the shit that could go wrong...

I always wonder how married life is for these brides, it's like the wedding is the big deal and not the marriage. I know of someone who's parents started saving for their DD's wedding, when she was born. All the bells and whistles. Sadly after the wedding of the century, the newlyweds separated after about 6 months.

Oooohhh...I want to be her FB friend! I love all this stuff but sadly I only have the one batshit crazy FB friend.

Seriously, what a bitch. That poor friend. I really hope that she gets flamed on the FB post.

Bet she streams it so his military mats abroad can watch the full glory.

Holy fuck

OMFG now the thread has moved on to whether or not it's reasonable to bill the bereaved guest for her uneaten meal and undrunk cocktail and champagne!

Oh my lord.

You have to keep us all updated on the wedding.

This is better than a movie.

no I'm really not place marking for future updates

Literally open mouthed at that text!

Wow.

Fuck me sideways.....Kitchen, you must have some serious restraint not to tell this stupid bitch to grow the fuck up, no one but her gives a shiny shite about her fucking wedding.

There are very few acceptable reasons for cancelling attendance at a wedding this close the the event. Close family bereavement is definitely one of those reasons. The groom should read his bride's posts and run the other way.

Kitchen, you must have some serious restraint not to tell this stupid bitch to grow the fuck up

Don't you dare tell her anything - we are all waiting to hear all the details of the w/e.

Totally unashamed to admit to place marking

I have a text message exchange saved on my phone that reads something like:

Friend: Hey MrsH - I understand you've got baby news?
Me: Is this a joke?
F: No, why?
Me: I just miscarried.

Absolutely no way she'd have plastered that on FB even though she does have zero boundaries.

I'm impressed she could look far enough ahead to text at all rather than waking up on Sunday morning and thinking "bollocks, I've missed Batshit's wedding".

I'm not suggesting she does Magi, as tempting as it would be.

I hope the bereaved friend shoves wedding cake down her mouth.

Is the friend whose DM has died on Facebook, will she see the BTB's posts?

Can I nominate this thread for classics ? How do I do that ? I've crossed my fingers and made a very Special Wish

Haha talizora I have NEVER posted anything to her, she added me after I liked the dog picture (I think I accepted on an accidental swipe by, I didn't think "oh yes let's be friends" and only noticed a while later that I could see her posts). I'm sure she'd just delete me if I tried to shed some light for her.

I am gobsmacked at the support she is getting! People trying to make out she's at least somewhat in the right blows my mind.

I do get that it's rude to cancel so late, but come on, phone the venue and get the money for that guest's meal etc. put behind the bar or something! Can't wait to see how this unfolds!

Shitting hell!

This is chic flick gold.

Maybe they are all so terrified of her they daren't say anything else?

Also not place marking this is fucking gold

I wish I could find her on FB and add her as a friend! Mine are all so normal