to have been shocked by Cuba?

[MummyIsNotMyName]

Watching 'the secret life of 4 year olds' I noticed that Cuba was never told off for hitting Skyla and it was even seen as a positive trait by the experimenting scientists. How is that alright?

Im sure that most potential parents know that it's not a good idea to hit other children.

I thought it was interesting to watch. I think you could tell that Skyla had spent a lot of time round adults, I think she'll grow into her personality.

Same with Chaim, I think his behaviour looked worse than it really is by four year old standards because he's so big for his age and looks more like a 7-8 year old than a four year old. I'm also glad that the psychiatrists or whatever they were had a lot of positive things to say about him and didn't dwell too much on his more difficult issues.

I thought Cuba was really sweet, hitting aside, and seemed quite switched on. I like a bit of deviance!

And christian will be PM one day!

All names were made up at some point.
Over time things change and new names evolve.

Indeed, just a shame that in the last couple of decades people have gone mad making up a couple of billion really stupid ones have appeared to replace the meaningful stock that evolved via numerous cultures over thousands of years.

That have appeared*

I thought it was a great programme. I love children at this age- there's so much going on in their lives but they are still so little. My favourite was the little girl who was practicing with her friend for the assembly. She told her friend to hold her hand and follow her words and everything would be ok- so so lovely.

I'm sure Cuba was spoken to about the the hitting incident. The staff made Chaim say sorry and he wrote a card for Skyla after he pinched her chocolate. He would learn far more from that than being shouted at and called a naughty boy.

Re the berries do you not think his mum had simply let him pick blackberries and forbid him from touching anything else.He's a country kid like my kids and they know they can pick whortleberries and blackberries but nothing else.

That said I too thought there was too much turning a blind eye to poor behaviour. Chaim's behaviour was appalling regardless of size,clearly a spoilt mummy's boy who had never had to share.I was shocked at the leniency shown to both too.

I really thought this was a series rather than a one of.

Please Channel 4, make more episodes!

I was fascinated from beginning to end.

Four year olds are lovely as they are turning from more babyish three year old into little people. And having to negotiate their way through learning to relate with others but still assert their own views.

I loved the psychologists/scientists descriptions and explanations for the children's behaviour.

Loved Skyla's internal conflict reflected on her face when she was being encouraged to share her chocolate but she really didn't want to

oh, and I thought all the children's names were fine.

Chaim's parents were Jewish after all

And Cuba isn't that outlandish, no more so than India which isn't that uncommon.

I'm sure Chaim is an 8 year old in disguise, he's enormous compared to the rest of them.
I was really impressed with Christian, so diplomatic for his age.

The new "stupid" names are now part of our culture and heritage.

Historians looking back will be able to interpret it all in terms of global movement, socio economic movement, defiance, and see the names in light of society as it was, or is.

My sons name is frequently berated here, and even ridiculed. Especially as a celebrity has chosen the name for his son.

But it is a traditional, old Norwegian name, on par with David or John.

I always wonder if people are naming their children after the place they were conceived.
At least that's my excuse for Necker and Mauritia.
I am lying. It just sounds better than Croydon and Chatham.

I'm sure I read recently that there has always been a similar proportion of 'new' or unusual names compared to traditional names, but of course in 30 years the new names will just be seen as normal.

Chaim's dad was called Moshe... And the hard "ch" gives it away.

Anyway, my problem with Cuba was his parents, who declared he knew which berries were safe to eat. Maybe some four yos do know these things but that horrified me.

I loved the programme, he probably was told off but it wasn't shown. The situations were set up in order to see how the children responded so it wasn't a normal nursery setting and I think the adults probably didn't intervene as quickly as they normally would.

I reckon Cubas family live on a barge, are lentil weavers and forage a lot/grow their own food. You can tell his jumper is homemade. That's probably how he can tell what berries are safe to eat.

Rainicorn, cuba's family did live on a barge or some class of boat, I think.

Yeah I thought they did from the footage shown. I'd love to live on a barge

Wasn't Christian amazing? So mature and diplomatic. And Skyla's little face when she was trying to decide whether to share her chocolate!

But I wish they would not just focus on the dominant children in the group, as though they are the only interesting ones. I would have liked to see what talents and traits the quieter children had too, and their parental influence.

I'm afraid I thought Chaim's mother seemed appalling, all that stuff about all fathers wanting a boy to carry on the family name, and especially such a beautiful blond and blue-eyed boy. Yuck.

Have to say when I saw Cuba my first thought was how lovely it was to see a child in a home knitted jumper like that and not something obscenely expensive from the designer section.

I'd be interested to know how the kids were chosen. Was it a kind of "be on a show" thing? I wasn't impressed with Chaim' s parents, and thought Cuba's were a bit "try-hard". Christian's were lovely, I thought. As was Christian himself. Like a PP, I felt there was too much emphasis on the stronger, more dominant characters; the more introverted ones are probably as interesting, but maybe not such good telly.

I thought Cuba's family's lifestyle looked lovely.

I also have lentil weaving aspirations but cannot knit and wouldn't know how to forage for my own food either.

But I do admire interesting individuals who follow their own path in life, not just urban sheep with an office job, living in the standard 3 bedroom terrace house, etc, etc...

editthis I would have liked to have seen more of the quieter children too. There was one gorgeous little boy who was quietly waiting his turn for the scooters [prior to feisty Cuba taking matters into his own hands ] and he was also asking children whether they were his best friend. I can't remember his name... but I would have liked to see more about him and his family.

In 14 years time Christian should append that programme to his CV. He was just adorable - amazing to see such a young child with such certainty of character and integrity. My 3 yr old DS was so similar to Skyla in the first section it was uncanny. Sweetness, occasional stubbornness and the inner conflict of weighing up personal gain and doing the right thing.

People mocking the name "Chaim", never heard of The Chosen by Chaim Potok?

Educate yourself before saying something hasty

I found the programme really fascinating. I think the names are pretty irrelevant tbh.

I found Chiams behaviour hard to like but think it's entirely the parents fault. They seem to see him as assertive and "the blue eyed boy". They should open their eyes and realise that his behaviour may lead to problems for him socially. I found it very interesting to see the influence of the nursery on him. He had made so much progress. He now tried hard to ask first for what he wanted even if the impulse to snatch was still there. He also owned up to something he did and did the lovely picture for Skyla. All enormous progress.

I personally loved Jessica (I think that was her) with her phone call..

"It's not your baby Richard! Stop calling! Ok, thank you, bye"