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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder what my neighbour was doing?

114 replies

Quantumlump · 30/01/2015 22:35

I was working from home today. About 10 a.m. I was on the phone upstairs and I saw my NDN peering through our downstairs window. She was there for a few minutes then she moved round to a bit of the house I can't see from upstairs. I finished my phone call and came down to look for her, but she'd gone. I went round to her house and said 'I saw you just came over, sorry I missed you, is everything OK?' She flatly denied that she'd been round to ours, and it was a bit awkward, so I said that I must have been mistaken, but I know it was definitely her. I figured maybe she had heard noise in our house, and was just checking for burglars, but was embarrassed in case I thought she was snooping. I mentioned it to my husband when he got home from work tonight, and he said that last week he came home at lunchtime and saw the same neighbour 'hot-footing it' over the low wall that divides our houses and rushing into her house. He thought it was a bit odd, but not worth mentioning. I'm sure it's nothing sinister, but I am just a bit baffled. We are reasonably friendly, we moved in two years ago and she's been round to ours for coffee quite a few times, so I can't see that our house would hold any great mystery to her. AIBU to think this is a bit odd?

OP posts:
SunbathingCat · 30/01/2015 22:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AmantesSuntAmentes · 30/01/2015 22:53

That is odd. I would leave messages out for her so she can read them through the window.

That's exactly the sort of thing I'd do! If I hadn't already had it out with her, which I would have. What an utter freak! My dogs would never allow something like this. Stranger or neighbour, there would be uproar if they were spotted voyeuristically peeping through our windows!

AgentZigzag · 30/01/2015 22:54

Very odd, especially as she denied doing it.

Next time you need a photo to confront her with so you don't have to pretend you think you're seeing things!

The only legit(ish) reason I can think of as to why she did it is if you're not answering the door and she's being a cheeky fuck trying to catch you out.

AgentZigzag · 30/01/2015 22:56

Posted too soon, but as she wasn't knocking to see if you're in it's not that.

Is it just this she's 'odd' about or are there other things you've brushed off as she's been OK generally?

OttiliaVonBCup · 30/01/2015 23:00

Are you sure it wasn't her twin sister visiting?

CupidStuntSurvivor · 30/01/2015 23:00

Go back over tomorrow. Seem slightly awkward. "Listen, this is a bit uncomfortable but I wanted to see who's been looking into the house so I checked our camera and it was definitely you. Are you sure you didn't need anything?"

wowfudge · 30/01/2015 23:02

Set up a CCTV camera and see what she's up to when you're not there.

It does sound rather odd. If it was just the one incident when you were working from home - maybe she thought you were ill and was checking to see if you were okay? - then I'd think nothing of it really. But scurrying off home when your husband returned from work. Odd indeed.

lemisscared · 30/01/2015 23:02

blatant place marking for updates

Pancakeflipper · 30/01/2015 23:02

How old is she? I am wondering if it's like some form of dementia, a neighbour of ours seems to have recently lost their previous sense of boundaries. In the Summer another neighbour found our usually very respectable neighbour in their garden picking out a lettuce from their veg patch. Then walk home with it hidden up their cardigan. Just odd sneaky behaviour like they know something is wrong but not sure exactly what is incorrect. Bin checking is their latest thing.

Original poster
Quantumlump · 30/01/2015 23:14

Glad you think it's strange too. Love the idea of leaving messages out or feigning CCTV coverage. I don't know exactly how old she is, but I'm guessing at mid-30s, so dementia seems unlikely. She's very nice, not at all odd, we quite often take parcels in for each other, so she knows where the doorbell is. I think I'm just going to have to ignore it. I was hoping there might be a blindingly obvious answer I was missing.

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MrsRayOfSunshine · 30/01/2015 23:14

I agree with leaving messages for her to read though the window. How odd, is she ok in general of does she show any other baffling behaviour?

Is there anyway you can stay at he one day and pretend your not in? Then quickly appear at a window she's got her nosed pressed to? She can hardly deny it was her then, and to just give her a scare for snooping.

cozietoesie · 30/01/2015 23:15

I feel I have to ask this.

Were your curtains open or closed?

MrsRayOfSunshine · 30/01/2015 23:15

Nose not nosed, I'm tired

Original poster
Quantumlump · 30/01/2015 23:15

Might ask her if she has a twin though, just to see her reaction.

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Original poster
Quantumlump · 30/01/2015 23:19

Ha ha cozie, our curtains were open and we are (in outward appearance at least) a 'hard-working family' of the type beloved of IDS et al!

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Pipbin · 30/01/2015 23:20

I can't see why she would deny it rather than make up an excuse.

cozietoesie · 30/01/2015 23:22

What possible excuse could she have made?

StandByYourTesselators · 30/01/2015 23:22

How bizarre! Does she have a pet that she suspects may have got into your house? Have any of her gnomes gone missing and she's checking whether you've stashed them in your sitting room?

I went stalking round my neighbour's garden once after a stray chicken... wouldn't have denied it though. Confused

seaoflove · 30/01/2015 23:23

How weird.

Was she snooping through a window? Either she's hoping to burgle you someday or wants to copy your room decor.

cozietoesie · 30/01/2015 23:23

I take that back - she could have said that she thought she saw the flickering of flames, I suppose.

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 30/01/2015 23:23

Is she a key holder for your alarm? If so I'd hazard a guess that she was planning to snoop and checking to see who was home

Hobby2014 · 30/01/2015 23:26

How weird! I'd defo go round again and say you've checked the cctv, and ask her again. Very strange.

Original poster
Quantumlump · 30/01/2015 23:28

She has no cats, dogs, chickens or even children that I am aware of. It's just her and her husband, and I promise I wasn't hiding him anywhere in the house. I'd like to think she was stealing my ideas for interior decor, but since we haven't replaced the last owner's wood chip wallpaper, even that seems unlikely.

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Jelliebabe2 · 30/01/2015 23:29

Lol definitely leave notes for her saying "stop looking in my windows you lunatic!"

Original poster
Quantumlump · 30/01/2015 23:30

She doesn't have keys. I have occasionally thought that maybe I should give her a set for emergencies, but I'm rethinking that now.

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