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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Please help urgent advice needed re wedding bar!!

104 replies

Weathergames · 20/01/2015 21:21

Oh wise ones I need your advice pretty please!!!

My friend getting married in a private house and has bought a load of booze and was going to have an honesty bar.

10 days before the event the venue has told her she is not allowed an honesty bar as she needs an events licence which she has no time to do now.

I said have a collection and get the best man to diplomatically/amusingly incorporate it into his speech?

Any suggestions?

TIA

OP posts:

YoniMitchell · 20/01/2015 21:24

Can they sell raffle tickets to win other goodies and cover the cost of the booze?

My understanding is they're ok f they don't 'sell' the booze, right?

Original poster

Weathergames · 20/01/2015 21:24

I think so yes ....

OP posts:

expatinscotland · 20/01/2015 21:25

Oops.

Won't a collection be the same thing, though?

Mammanat222 · 20/01/2015 21:25

Sorry I have no idea what an honesty bar is? Or what the 'new' option is?

Original poster

Weathergames · 20/01/2015 21:27

Honesty bar where they have already bought all the booze but have a jar or whatever for people to leave money to pay for their drinks.

OP posts:

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea · 20/01/2015 21:28

We had exactly the same issue and just did it anyway, just very subtly.

BertieBotts · 20/01/2015 21:28

Does it really take that long to get an events licence? I would look into it, it's not very complicated I don't think.

Honesty bar is when you provide alcohol and friends pay for what they drink.

Could they just get people to pay later? I suppose people might forget what they've had, though.

YoniMitchell · 20/01/2015 21:28

Would people really leave enough to cover what they drink? Would the B&G be prepared to write off the cost of the drink of necessary?

CMOTDibbler · 20/01/2015 21:29

This is one of the very few occasions that I would think a 'wishing well' might be a good idea. On the end of the bar would be a good place to put it perhaps , and just get the ushers to make everyone aware of the situation discretely

YoniMitchell · 20/01/2015 21:29

Send a poem to guests before the wedding?

mrsminiverscharlady · 20/01/2015 21:29

That's odd, because I once left it waaay too late to get a licence for a preschool event. When I spoke to the licencing people at the council they said voluntary donations were fine but we as long as we didn't have set prices and left it entirely up to people how much to put in.

ThinkIveBeenHacked · 20/01/2015 21:30

Now she has bought the booze, id go for an event license. Or has anyone attending the event got a liquor license? That may be enough, that they are on the premises.

If she hadnt bought the booze already id have said just do a "bring your own booze" thing.

mrsminiverscharlady · 20/01/2015 21:31

Should add that we made far much more money on the bar than we did when we charged set prices!

LynetteScavo · 20/01/2015 21:32

Who will be "policing" the venue?

Surely a "donations" box near the bar wouldn't be the same a selling it.

And I think your friend must know some really lovely people. I wouldn't trust my friends with an honesty bar.

MrsTawdry · 20/01/2015 21:34

CMOT yes...I agree a wishing well would work brilliantly. Especially if it were nice and tacky with an amusing rhyme about drinking the leprechauns beer and please can you stick some money down there for him.

LynetteScavo · 20/01/2015 21:34

I thought the event licence needed to be organised at least 10 days before the event...so if they're getting married on the 30th, is tomorrow too late?

Shockers · 20/01/2015 21:34

We did this and just had a donations jar.

The money in it covered the cost of the (really quite good) wine and beer, but with no profit... which suited us, as making a profit wouldn't have felt right.

LynetteScavo · 20/01/2015 21:35

Or are they getting married on the Friday? (my counting isn't very good )

Original poster

Weathergames · 20/01/2015 21:35

Yes they don't want to make a profit.

OP posts:

Original poster

Weathergames · 20/01/2015 21:36

31st

OP posts:

TwiggyHeart · 20/01/2015 21:37

Give a bottle to each person as a wedding favour...

BertieBotts · 20/01/2015 21:37

Could they hand out the booze in advance and have everyone "bring their own"

Moobaloo · 20/01/2015 21:37

Phone council licensing dept and beg for a late Temporary event notice. Info here www.gov.uk/temporary-events-notice

Could be do able. If not then a donations box.

Is the venue licensed? If so having someone with a personal licence to sell it should be fine without a TEN.

Definitely speak to council. They can be very helpful x

LynetteScavo · 20/01/2015 21:43

So, I think tomorrow is the last day for them to get it...I don't think they have to go themselves. When I was on the school PTA any of us used to go to the town hall to get one, I think. I never offered

MsPavlichenko · 20/01/2015 21:45

I agree re speaking to council. If they can't do an emergency licence, they may be relaxed about a donation type bar if you stress it will be voluntary.

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