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AIBU?

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Original poster

To tell DH about shock BFP while he's at work?

60 replies

Onsera3 · 13/01/2015 12:04

Picked up some tests at Tesco this morning and have just got BFP on both.

We are preparing for a frozen embryo transfer at the moment. Our DS was conceived through IVF.

I am in shock as we really want a baby but I also feel guilty for the frozen blastocyst who has a high percentage of success and has been waiting for almost 3 years for a chance.

My family are all asleep on the other side of the world.

Is it etiquette to wait til DH gets home from work?

OP posts:
BarbarianMum · 13/01/2015 12:07

Congratulations Flowers

It would be better to wait til he gets home, esp if he has to drive and esp if you don't want half his office to know. Could you ask him to get home early?

Primaryteach87 · 13/01/2015 12:07

When something similar happened to me, I couldn't wait. Totally get the impulse! Perhaps text him and ask him to ring you when he's having a break or out of the office so you can both talk freely?

SocialMediaAddict · 13/01/2015 12:08

I wouldn't be able to wait!

Congratulations!!!!

firstposts · 13/01/2015 12:10

Congratulations. I also had miracle BFP while waiting for frozen cycle. We called DS2 'the queue jumper' I do understand the feeling regarding the frozen embie. I did call DH at work, after I had taken 5 tests because just couldn't believe it was possible Smile

Tinkerball · 13/01/2015 12:10

Congratulations!!! Head says wait...but I don't think I could!

Sternin · 13/01/2015 12:11

I don't know about etiquette, but I don't know if I could concentrate at work after getting such amazing news! Maybe you could use the time between now and when he gets home to prepare some celebratory stuff for this evening? Congratulations, by the way! Cake

SaucyJack · 13/01/2015 12:11

Tell him now as it's good news Smile

In other circs it's definitely a conversation you need to have face to face.

WerewolfBarMitzvah · 13/01/2015 12:13

Congratulations!
I would want to wait but in your shoes I'd be so excited so would have to phone!
Do update his reaction. Love dad reactions.

Original poster
Onsera3 · 13/01/2015 12:13

Thank you all. Such a surprise!

Unfortunately, he's in one of this jobs you can't leave early without finding a replacement.

OP posts:
museumum · 13/01/2015 12:13

I'd tell him. I texted my dh that I had big news and could he call me when he got a break.

crazykat · 13/01/2015 12:16

I rang dh at work to tell his as I couldn't wait. He did tell the lads he was working with that day so if you do phone him tell him to keep it quiet or everyone will know.

ContentedSidewinder · 13/01/2015 12:17

Sit on your hands! Grin

Wouldn't you want to see his face? I would so I would wait but it would be dreadfully hard.

Huge congratulations.

JohnFarleysRuskin · 13/01/2015 12:18

Wait! Being together is so much nicer...

bsmirched · 13/01/2015 12:19

Congratulations! The very same thing happened to us - the day before we were due to start stims for our frozen embryos! I'd had the Gonapeptyl jab 3 weeks before, so in theory it really shouldn't have happened.

I know I couldn't wait if it was me!

Mrsteddyruxpin · 13/01/2015 12:22

Oh lovely lovely news. I couldn't wait and told dh on the phone both times but you could get all romantic with the alphabet spaghetti for dinner or stick a post it under the toilet seat or something runs away with herself

Marshy · 13/01/2015 12:22

I rang my dh at work and told him to book some time off for April. He asked why and got the surprise of his life when I said he'd need some time with the new baby Grin

Different circs to you though. It was our 2nd, unexpectedly conceived after we had undergone treatment for the first.

Congratulations! Hope he's home soon

Aherdofmims · 13/01/2015 12:25

Congratulations!

I do feel for you 're frozen embryo but logically it isn't actually waiting and won't know any different. If you feel strongly about the idea later on you could possibly go for 3 dcs?

ImCatbug · 13/01/2015 12:30

Congrats!

I don't think I'd be able to wait. But you could make it fun, make a big banner or wrap the test up like a gift and give it to him when he gets home.

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 13/01/2015 12:31

I wouldn't be able to wait - ring him now! Grin

Greenrememberedhills · 13/01/2015 12:34

Congratulations.

It would be lovely if you could bear to wait, and then you'll have the chance to spend time together after telling him face to face.

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 13/01/2015 12:37

I told my DH while he was at work. He was really hacked off about it as he couldn't see me or give me a hug.

Wait.

Huge congratulations !!

manchestermummy · 13/01/2015 13:51

I called my DH and just told him "I can see a line".

Dead silence.

"Okay, going out of the office now...!" We then proceeded to talk in code for a few minutes and he came home as soon as he could. With extra tests so he could see for himself!

Congratulations to you! Flowers

TheWitTank · 13/01/2015 13:55

Wow, that's brilliant news, congratulations! I could my wait as I'm impatient and would be far too excited!

FightOrFlight · 13/01/2015 14:02

Lovely thread x congratulations Onsera Flowers

I'd resist the urge to tell him at work and let him know as soon as he gets home because I would want to see the reaction on his face. I'd be like a cat on a hot tin roof until he got home though!

stickingpoint2 · 13/01/2015 14:20

Oh that's amazing news Flowers congratulations!