to not understand middle names with no meaning?

[QueenofKelsingra]

Just been lurking about on baby names.

Can someone please explain the rationale of spending months agonising over finding a second name that they love, just for it to be a middle name that is basically never used other than on official paperwork? I don't get it

My 3 DC have middle names that belonged to family members no longer with us that we wanted to remember and wanted the kids to be aware of as they grow up. it would never occur to DH and I to used a name we just liked as a middle name - save it for the next DC! plus it took us long enough to find one name we liked enough for each DC first name

If you have no-one you want to commemorate why give a middle name at all??

thank you 123jump for understanding what i was actually getting at!

my DC1 has two middle names as both DH and i had a meaningful family name we wanted to use. DCs2 &3 have one each.

I know quite a few people who use their middle name instead of their first name, as they prefer it. So a middle name could be 'meaningless' but just give you a choice of which name you would like to be known by.

My family do the 'meaningful' thing though, with all of us having middle names from parents/grandparent's names. I'm not sure which way I prefer.

Actually re databases - if your child is going to have a John Smith name, the middle name should be a swear word.

It would make the IT conversations more fun.

'NO its not John Bastard Smith, he works downstairs, I am John CUNTING Smith can you please fix my login'

Middle names are irrelevant whether they’ve been chosen because they sound nice or they’re a nod to dear departed Auntie Mavis. I don't get the big to-do some people have over middle names but I don't think they necessarily need to have 'meaning'.

YABU and unimaginative to boot.

I don't have a middle name nor do my siblings but my dd does. She has my deceased mums name as her middle name. I don't think it's odd at all and I've always said I would use this name with my first dd even if my mum was alive. My nephews middle names are part of their dads culture. It is common to use these names depending on the day or month they were born

waiting good plan!

I have the middle name of a dead relative. I hate it and I never use it.

My dad has the same first name, surname and date of birth of a known criminal and it is his middle name which saves him each time it has been an issue (mainly with airlines).

My kids have middle names which sound nice with their first names. It gives me something to say when I am "full name"ing them when they are in trouble ;) - they all shorten their first names too so it has double impact.

I too could name many children. But there is a hierarchy of names for me, i love many names but first names have to be super special. So it is almost the other way round for me, the first names need a meaning and the Middle names can be ones I just like :)

Many fun reasons for middle names, the conversations at school, the comedy on a wedding day, who wouldn't want that?! :-D

DP & I are terribly trashy and wanted yooneek name for our PFB. We managed to restrain ourselves for her first name but chose something mildly silly for the middle one.

We're ttc another and we've no idea what to call him/her but we've got a cracker of a middle name picked out already.

YANBU I don't understand the anxiety people get in trying to chose a middle name. If there's a name you like and you want to use it then fine but why the stress.

I've found choosing a first name stressful enough never mind having to choose two.

In my family there's a tradition that the eldest child of the eldest child gets a particular middle name, I am the eldest of the eldest so have it and my pfb ds due in March will have it.

My two middle names are one Biblical and one literary.
My children all have middle names that we liked, no particular "meaning".
I'm really not sure what your issue here is OP!

I've been doing a lot of family history research and I have come to appreciate middle names to help identify the correct person.

As someone said up thread, if there are twenty-five John Smiths born in Edinburgh in 1900 it is really helpful if your ancestor is John McFarlane Smith (fictitious names). Please do give your DCs a middle name. Please make it unusual, or better still, please use a name from a previous generation.

If middle names a so pointless though surely it's not a very good way to commemorate someone.
Middle names are important to me. I like that it's something about me that nobody knows unless I choose to tell them. I liked in my wedding people actually commented on my middle names (I have two, both just ones my parents liked).
I quite often use my DC's middle names, not just when I'm cross.

But what if you don't like your family?

Liking the name Jane is the same as liking the Great Granny Agnes or flower Lily in my book.

are so not a so.

I'm equally perplexed by people choosing family names as middle names. You said yourself that middle names are never used, and hardly feature on the child's radar, so what's the point?

MIL is still smarting because we didn't use her name as dd's middle name. If we HAD used her name, not only would other relatives have become upset (so it's a whole vicious circle of pointless resentments and slights), but dd would undoubtedly have disliked the name as she grew up and sought to distance herself from it wherever possible. Why in hell would I go there?

That's certainly how DH has always felt about the family name MIL bestowed on him as a middle name. He certainly didn't revere and venerate the name as she would have hoped!

I chose middle names for my dc for several reasons

1. It's traditional to have more than one name.
2. It gives my dc the option on a different name when older if for some reason they hate the first.
3. 3 letter initials are useful. In all my career wherever I've been my initials are my reference on all documents. Double letter initials are odd and less easy to identify.
4. I liked the names I chose but they were too common to use as first names.
5. They are bible names which felt right when we had then christened.
6. A middle initial is a useful identifier when you have the same name as some else which I've known happen a lot in my large company.

I've never understood people giving no middle names other than they just don't like it, which is fine!

I don't love awful middle names that are family names either a maiden name or dead relative, usually a grandparent. But each to they own.

My daughters' middle names have no real meaning. I never liked either of my grandmothers' names, my husbands grandmothers names or either of our mothers' names. They are very dated names that i wouldn't lumber them with.

My son's is a family name, luckily it is a timeless name that is still used today. It belonged to both my grandfathers, one first name and one middle name.

I think both reasons are perfectly valid.

I am French, and I have 3 middle names, 2 grandmas plus godmother. Therefore my sister and I share 2 middle names.
similarly, my brother has 2 grandfathers plus godfather.

My GM wasn't given a middle name - her parents were still arguing over what name she should be called as they were walking up the church path to her christening. Unfortunately for her, her father got to the vicar first and said 'she's going to be called xxx' and didn't include a middle name.

All her other sisters had pretty flower names and had middle names. She was stuck with a name that she hated (very plain, no nice ee or a sound at the end like her sisters) and no middle name to change to either.

She always felt hard done by - even at the end of her life when she was in her late 90s, it was something that played on her mind as she wondered why she wasn't given 'two nice names' like her sisters!

The sister's middle names didn't have meanings as far as I'm aware - it's not like they were called after their gp or some such and they'd run out of them! And why her mother didn't add her own choice as second name I don't know either (can't remember what it was now, but I seem to think that it would have been preferred by dgm - maybe her dad didn't want her to have the choice and just have his name!)

I think it is nice to have a middle name - even if the only meaning is that your parents liked it - it adds an extra dimension to your own name, even if it is just for family or initials or whatever.

I was reading in the papers today about the young Chelsea defender Kurt Happy Zouma. His middle name put a smile on my face and instantly made me like him. So while it may not have any greater significance its still a good use of a middle name. I will now follow big Happys career with interest.

I also liked another footballers middle name Joseph-Dsir Job. That may well just be a common Franco-African name however to me it always sounded as though whenever he was introducing himself he was asking for a job which would be pretty handy if he was looking for one. If he walked into the Queen Vic they'd through him a tea towel and leave him in charge of the place.

We gave our DS an unusual first name, it has personal family connections and we love it. We gave him a more 'normal' middle name so that if he so chooses he can go by that if he didn't get on with his first name That was our reasoning anyway!

I love his full name together though!

I like 10 girls names. I won't be having 10 daughters, so I might as well give them names I like rather than the family name 'Pauline.'

'Its a family name' is a line always trotted out. Easy to say if you have NICE family names.

I agree with you and was just thinking this the other day.

However, at school I was envious of my best friend who had TWO very pretty middle names which put our Louises, Anns and Marys to shame! My dcs have living relatives names as their middle names!