To not flush every time I use the loo?

[ScarlettDarling]

Dh thinks it's disgusting that if we're all, (me, dh, ds, dd,) heading out somewhere and all using the loo just before we go, that I prefer us not to flush the loo after each wee. My reasoning is that an awful lot of water is being wasted with the loo being flushed 4 times in about 2 mins. His argument is that it's just plain to disgusting to wee on top of someone else's wee! So...who is right?!

YANBU. Why do you need to flush after each pee when you are all going to use it before going out? I have to admit that we don't flush after each pee (water metered, not to mention a waste of water). We do flush if we have guests around though!

Yanbu.

Obvs in minority - always flush. Can't stand a loo with dirty water and a smell.

I wouldn't say you are disgusting. It's really not a huge deal in the great scheme of things. But my DH doesn't always flush (trying to save the environment) and I do feel a bit eww if I walk in and find wee in the toilet so I do ask him to flush every time and he does, for a while, then starts to see if he can do it again without me complaining and round and round we go!

When the DC were small and easily woken, we didn't flush overnight and it didn't bother me then - I think the terror of waking one of them overrode my yucky feelings!

Never flush at night after ds has gone to bed (unless someone has a numero deux ). She is 6 now but I think its a habit we picked up from her being a baby.

*dd not ds

Agree! Such a waste to flush after each wee. No harm done surely as you're all family. I wouldn't want to use the loo in a public toilet if someone hadn't flushed it though - which I think is not unreasonable.

Of course YANBU it's pointless and wasteful to flush. If it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown flush it down.

We're on a water meter and definitely don't flush every time if just a wee. Only flush every time if AF is visiting or if no2.

Another YANBU here.

It shouldn't really smell if you're drinking plenty of fluids anyway.

I rarely flush ours day or night after a wee unless we have visitors, in which case, I stick to peeing in the ensuite and don't flush it.

Can't bear to waste water even though we're not metered. It just feels inherently wrong somehow.

As long as you flush after all of you it's no problem imo, we call it "a cocktail of wee" disgusting probably.....

We only flush a few times in the day in our house unless we have visitors. Wee does not smell in reality. Huge waste of water and resources. We are not on a metre but ethically its wasteful. Poo gets flushed

I follow the adage

If it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown flush it down

My DC's flush every time they remember and have never heard of the above statement yet from me.

An ex flat mate who I didn't know too well used to go to the loo and never flush when he did a wee. Imo it was extremely disgusting for when I walked into the toilet to use it to see his urine in the toilet and it stank the bathroom out - sometimes it had been there since morning and I would come back from work to find the bathroom smelling of stale piss. Its gross and to top it off he never washed his hands either. So I am on the side of your DH.

YABU. Wee stinks out a bathroom if left unflushed. My in-laws are in the habit of not flushing at night. I hate it. It's bad enough to see and smell your immediate family's stale piss greeting you in the morning, but someone else's is just awful.

LilMissSunshine I have to admit I'd find it weird if it was a flat mate I didn't really know. But with DP and DSS it's fine IMO :) would always flush if visitors - or at least I try to remember. Like others have said though, even if we weren't on a meter we wouldn't flush every time as it's such a waste of water. My parents aren't on a meter but I always remember being told to not flush if someone needed to go after me before we all head out. I really can't understand why you'd flush if someone needs to go immediately after.

Would have to ask those who do flush every time, whether they are metered or not. I'm metered, but that's not the only reason I would flush every few times (unless expecting a visitor), it is a major waste of good clean drinking water.

If we had some tank arrangement built into the upper half of the outer walls nearest gutters (ie a foot or more above lever of a low tank loo (presumably the majority of toilets these days), then we could use rainwater to flush (subject to a bit of filtering to reduce change of clogging from moss, leaves, etc). A neighbour would love to propose this for 'green living' to the major house building groups, and I feel it could be adapted (with tanks on each floor, in only outer walls) to cope with 3 floor homes with multiple loos.

Obviously it would need some form of insulation to prevent freezing, and careful design so access could be achieved from outside for replacement/ maintenance in case of any leaks... I suppose it would become inexpensive to add tanks along with cavity wall insulation (or whatever is currently expected in new build homes, I'm not up on all the regulations!). Also, house structure and load bearing ideas would need revision.

Indoors if one assumed the tank was say 15-24" "thick", the whole depth of room (from window towards centre of house, say), and perhaps 4' tall (from ceiling down), then below the tank there could be storage cupboards, shoe draws, etc, and then pipework from floor to floor [for ground floor tank to loo and/or garden tap], and to the loo on the current floor, would be extra to plan. Some form of valve could be used at each loo, so in times of no rain, mains water pressure would enable it to be used without human intervention to switch anything on/off.

If having a gap under these tanks was a problem (I do appreciate there's some significant weight involved, and in most lofts there is good support to handle the main water tank), then having full height tanks, perhaps a bit narrower, may be possible, still with some mechanism to ensure top-most tank keeps some water and 'overflow' goes down to next floor, rather than having such high pressure at the ground floor that there'd be massive problem if garden tap washer was leaky, and all floors lost all their water via that tap...

Any builders / architects care to comment?

Maybe your DH could go first in the case of a mass family wee, so he gets the clean water?

I flush when I think there is enough paper in there to warrant a flush, which is quite a few wees but only one poo. Don't want to block the pipes.

Never had a meter but have had loos that took so long to fill you would prevent the next person from being able to flush for ages if they needed to go soon after you, so that's maybe partly where the habit formed. Also just can't bear the waste.

Collaborate - "It's bad enough to see and smell your immediate family's stale ... but someone else's is just awful."

It's no longer so common (unless finding very dated public toilets, or in old pubs where there's no automatic flush) but bear in mind many gents loos were, for years and years, a porcelain 'wall' with a single trough with a set of individual cubicles on the other side.

In an old thread 'TheFuzz' said "Troughs or gutters are still very common." So bear that in mind when you're out with DS or DH, ladies (and hope they washed their hands) !

I remember on a holiday visit to Ottawa, Canada, in 1987, I stayed with a {French} mother and (grown up) daughter. They insisted on turning the sink tap on to mask any other sounds from their use of the toilet. I did the same, just to ensure I didn't offend, but it was a waste of water.

Having had a prostate operation, I tend to sit down (*) when using the loo at home... not always possible or even desirable when out at public venues.
(I'm genuinely not especially 'fussy' but there are plenty of really horrible public loos with broken / missing seats, rubbish door locks, etc, and we all have some 'standards' don't we).

(*) a recommendation my consultant gave a young chap in an episode of Embarrassing Bodies - it was quite strange being able to recognise one of the many specialists they talk to.

I don't either. My toilet has started making a horrible rattling noise when flushed so I need to try and fix it. It sounds a bit scary.

I don't see anything wrong with that. Most people would think my family disgusting because we don't have a lock on the door and rarely even close it properly if everyone else is asleep. I make sure to flush before leaving the house and when expecting guests, but otherwise, and especially when I have the place to myself, it doesn't bother me. My pet hate, however, is having to flush someone else's wee before a poo (I don't want to be splashed!) and then again after, so I'm probably BU to contribute to the problem.

Just me and DS at home most of the time, no we don't flush wee until we have collected a few. Always flush if I have guests though!

In Hk we have flush water ( sea water) which is separate from the fresh/ drinking water. Makes sense as no point in flushing the loo with drinking water.

It really grosses me out so flush always here.

I'm always worried about splashback.

Yanbu. It's wasteful to flush all the time. I would always flush if visitors in the house but if not I'm glad not to waste water.