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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To put my toddler in 2nd hand pants?

113 replies

Failedspinster · 30/12/2014 15:28

Bit of a weird one here. My mum has some neighbours to whom she is very close; they are really kind people and coincidentally have two sons just a little older than my two. They have very generously passed on their boys' outgrown clothes for the last couple of years, since i had my toddler. I'm very grateful for all their help.

Recently, they sent a lot of underpants. My toddler son (2.8yo) is just starting potty training and so this is the first time that pants have been passed on. AIBU to feel a bit icky about putting my son in second hand pants? They are clean and have been washed, but I can't shake this slightly icky feeling about it. Im normally very happy (and grateful) for him to wear everything they send....but pants?

I wore a lot of second hand clothes growing up but pants and shoes were always new, for reasons of hygiene and fit, respectively. My mum keeps telling me that I don't need to buy my son pants as her neighbours have passed on plenty, so she definitely doesn't seem to feel icky about it. But I do! Also, I'd like to feel that at least my sons pants were his own. It seems an illogical feeling to have thiugh, so what do you think? aIBU?

OP posts:

MuscatBouschet · 30/12/2014 17:20

Mine are in second hand everything, including pants. Horribly wasteful to chuck perfectly decent clothes away.

Micah · 30/12/2014 17:21

Donate the pants to nursery/childminders/reception class!

They're always grateful, as children do have accidents, and if they do send a child home in their own stash, they rarely come back...

Hakluyt · 30/12/2014 17:21

" pile of hand me downs by someone very close to us (DD has previously worn their children's pants after peeing herself at their house) and there are pants in there as well as wash cloths for down below. I am also too freaked out to use them, so I say YANBU."

What in the name of all that's wonderful is a "wash cloth for down below"?

Theas18 · 30/12/2014 17:28

No different to 2nd had cloth nappies or tbh baby clothes as they all get covered in wee and poo at some stage!

Just wash em and use em. You will be so happy not to panic about running out of pants when they are a bit leaky!

Notso · 30/12/2014 17:53

I've just sorted out a load of DS2's old pants to use on DS3 who will be in pants once everyone goes back to school/work. He does have his own George pig pants that Father Christmas brought him but he's my 4th and I know we will need loads in the next few weeks.
DS2 came home from nursery in a pair of faded lime green teenage mutant ninja turtle pants after an accident. He loved them so much I had to ask his teacher if we could keep them in exchange for a pair of his own

Scholes34 · 30/12/2014 18:14

No problem with second hand pants or knickers. The OP mentioned shoes in the original post - I would draw the line at second hand shoes because of fit (but not second hand wellies).

DoJo · 30/12/2014 19:28

Madthing5 is wearing bob the builder pants today that I bought for madthing1 as a toddler, he is now 15 so they have done well!

I read this the first time as being a 15 year old wearing a toddler's BTB pants - took me a couple of goes to get my brain into gear, but the mental image was oddly entertaining!

Jodie1982 · 30/12/2014 19:33

I don't think YABU. It is a bit icky tbh. Pants r cheap enough, Primark are always cheap n cheerful

Buttercupsanddaisys · 30/12/2014 19:34

No probs atorl must live in a parallel world, me.

Greenfizzywater · 30/12/2014 20:48

I really don't get why so many people wouldn't use them. Do you all think your kids are going to catch some disease from them?

MERLYPUSSEDOFF · 30/12/2014 21:07

Is it different (and not yukky) if twin brothers wear the stockpile of pants? They share all their other clothes including pj's and flannels. I do own a washing machine after all

Artandco · 30/12/2014 21:14

Merly- nah both ds's have communal pants here. They are the same size as close in age so no one every remembers who's who anyway

papooshka · 30/12/2014 21:16

Wouldn't bother me at all, a friend gave me loads of pants for my ds, they were used but like new. Weirdly not sure I would like second hand pants for my dd.

SignoraStronza · 30/12/2014 21:18

I was given a massive bag of second hand pants by a friend (who I know is very 'clean'). Great, as not sure what I did with dd1's. Not bothered by it at all and means that I have enough that I can bin after poo accidents (tmi, but we rarely get the kind that don't 'stick'). Can't really see the issue with second hand pants for potty training purposes!

saintlyjimjams · 30/12/2014 21:19

Wouldn't/didn't bother me. But recent threads show there are mumsnetters who think using second hand pants (even between siblings) is terrible parenting.

ItsaboatJack · 30/12/2014 21:25

YANBU, I passed down everything with my dc except pants. Strangely though I did re-use cloth nappies with them so makes no sense but there you go.

forago · 30/12/2014 21:26

the people who buy new from Primark for each kid, do you wash then before they wear them?

Hakluyt · 30/12/2014 21:30

So you would rather your children wore pants made by another child in a sweat shop than washed pants worn by another child?

And please will someone tell me what a "wash cloth for down below" is?

fredfredgeorgejnr · 30/12/2014 21:36

It's a wash cloth for when you're in hell or Australia depending on your religious and geographical beliefs.

Discopanda · 30/12/2014 21:40

My DD sometimes wears 2nd hand pants because she's just about finished potty training. I have bought her some new ones but they cost about the same as adult pants despite being a fifth of the size!

DuelingFanjo · 30/12/2014 21:43

We use second hand pants, no problem.

Lifesalemon · 30/12/2014 22:34

I've unfortunately never had hand me down anything for my daughter because all my friends/relatives had older boys.
I've always thrown out her underwear when I'm sorting used clothes to give away though as it just never occured to me that any one would want to use them.

Bulbasaur · 30/12/2014 22:46

So you would rather your children wore pants made by another child in a sweat shop than washed pants worn by another child?

Yes. 100% yes.

Pre-worn undies are just gross.

You could probably sterilize a moon cup too, but I can promise no one would use a second hand moon cup.

There's just some things you don't do.

I'll meet you halfway on this though and say that they should make better working conditions and laws in factories.

Frogme · 30/12/2014 22:57

Am I the only one who didn't get through hundreds of pairs whilst potty training? It was quite straightforward and easy.

I used to pass on and accept clothes from friends, but there were never pants or socks involved. Not logical but I get the ick factor.

backwardpossom · 30/12/2014 22:58

I'd use them. They're just going to get pissed/shat on. I have used second hand nappies though, to be fair. I may not be the standard against which you should measure yourself

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