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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask what is the rudest thing a friend or relative has ever done at a meal out?

279 replies

BallsforEarings · 27/12/2014 15:50

When out at a meal with a bunch of friends, my ex-friend (never popular -known for rudeness!) once asked if she could taste my chilli con carne, I said 'of course' and she proceeded to take a huge forkful and then pronounce loudly 'UGGHHH!! That is SHIT'.

I was left to 'enjoy' the rest of my chilli after that!

Anyone got/had a friend/relative with worse manners?

OP posts:
PedantMarina · 30/12/2014 17:16

BogeyFace, snorted drink out my nose at you putting "pissing under the bar" and "relief manager" in the same paragraph. Xmas Grin

Bogeyface · 30/12/2014 17:19

:o

I didnt even see that! Rather apt really isnt it?! :o

PedantMarina · 30/12/2014 18:26

sontarans, I think the manager was lovely, looking after the staff. I don't think it's unprofessional at all. Some restaurants eject diners for auto-condimenting; expecting a wanker to rein it in a bit to protect your staff is just decent behaviour. I'd happily dine there.

MrsItsNoworNotatAll · 30/12/2014 19:22

I think you only get caught out the once with the everyone splitting the bill equally thing. The next time you go out in a group you're more alert to it. At least that's how it worked for me and Dh anyway. It only happened the once as the only time it did we ended up well out of pocket.

The bill for each of us was £20 so that was £40 from me and Dh. His meal came to £9 and mine was a bit less so we ended up over £20 out of pocket. Well paying for some of the greedy bastards meals anyway. We'd had drinks before the meal and could only afford one more after as there was still the taxi home to pay for.

What annoyed Dh was the twats who'd ordered the most expensive things on the menu didn't even eat all the food on theirplates. There were piles of chips, onion rings etc.

We went out with those folk again but made it clear that we would be paying for our own meals. There were some looks thrown our way but rather that than be out of pocket for the sake of someone's greed and wastefulness.

WeeFreeKings · 30/12/2014 19:48

Bogey it's truly amazing what you can glean from a couple of posts Grin. She is indeed aspirational having married a man whose talents allowed her to never work again having been a hairdresser when they met. And yet regularly tells DH who's looking to change job how easy it is to get a job these days Hmm It is almost like she enjoys making them run round after her. You'd think having been customer facing as a hairdresser she'd remember but I guess it was 50 years ago!

Another example was when we went to one of these places where you pay extra for sides including veg and potatoes. She was asked if she wanted any sides and the waitress made it very clear it came with nothing. Then she kicked up a fuss there were no potatoes. And when the girl brought some as quickly as she could (bearing in mind she hadn't ordered them at the time of the main being cooked) my MIL refused to eat any of them as she'd 'practically finished' her meal. Littledragon I really had to bite my tongue for that one and we've not gone back there with her since.

And it is rank having accidentally picked up her glass instead of mine. That's presumably why the staff think she couldn't possibly want it! Grin

NoLongerTheSeasonToBeJolly · 30/12/2014 19:56

I've twice had to clean customer's vomit up. One bloke just stropped over me when I was on my hands and knees cleaning it. No apology and no tip!

quietbatperson · 30/12/2014 20:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CyclopsBee · 30/12/2014 20:39

My old boss was a nightmare,
Every Xmas we had a 'works' meal out, we had to pay for our own meals which she collected the money for beforehand, always about 14 of us.

Well, no matter where we went she would find fault. If someone's meal came out abit later than the others she would demand they take the whole lot back as they were getting cold Blush
She would constantly moan about her own meal and thought nothing of telling the waiter(s) what she thought,
I swear the chefs must have spat in our meals on occasion Shock

Bogeyface · 30/12/2014 21:16

I have never seen a meal tampered with to piss off a wanker but...........

I have never put myself out for anyone who treats servers like shit. For a normal table if I saw the drinks were getting low I would ask if they would like more rather than waiting for them to ask me. I would offer more veg or go to a bit more trouble for puddings (we had to make them) and would offer half and half on puds if someone couldnt decide and it was doable.

If someone was being a tosser then they would be served exactly in turn so if I three tables waiting for something then I would see to those tables first. You would get exactly what it said on the menu, no less but no more. You can wait until I have finished serving another table before I take your drink order rather than taking it on memory and dropping it to the bar as I pass, that sort of thing.

You reap what you sow with waiting staff so be nice to them!

Bogeyface · 30/12/2014 21:18

weefree funny how you get the measure of people isnt it? If I told you about my mum, who is the exact opposite in terms of creating a fuss, you would soon work out that she is the type to smile through a meal even if she hated it. She would pay the bill and the slag the place off to all and sundry. God forbid she would make a genuine complaint and deal with it there and then! She is working class made good and I still think that she thinks that restaurants are too posh "for the likes of us" despite her being able to buy outright half of the ones she goes too :o

GraysAnalogy · 30/12/2014 21:20

My birthday meal - went out for what was supposed to be a cheap meal. 2 personal friends, 2 friends from work. friends from work ordered 2 bottles of champagne, I was on cheap drinks because I was skint really, they didn't offer me a class of champagne but then had the gall to demand we split the bill.

I was really gutted.

MrsTawdry · 30/12/2014 21:26

I can't understand the whole splitting bills equally between groups. Not at all. Why is it those who eat like greedy feckers are always the ones most keen to do this!?

I THINK I understand that some groups like to do it to avoid any "un-English" money discussions at the end....but tough!

thenightsky · 30/12/2014 21:34

Bloody hell grays and on your birthday too Shock they actually sat drinking champagne in front of you?

HorizontalRunningOnly · 30/12/2014 21:35

We went out for a Christmas meal, one person pulled out her phone charger and plugged in her phone! Then through out dinner kept nipping to the end of the table nearest the socket to check her phone. As she didn't have a starter and we did she spent the whole starter section head down perching on an empty seat texting then nipped back to her own seat for mains. During mains got up at least four times for several minutes at a time to check and send messages!

Bogeyface · 30/12/2014 21:35

We have never done the split bill thing unless it is genuinely just a couple of quid or less in it. We are all too bolshy in our friendship group to be taken advantage of!

Yes there are cheeky fuckers who will take advantage but it is hard to have sympathy for someone who ends up £40 out of pocket and having to walk home when all it takes is saying "Actually, I didnt have any wine and my main was much cheaper so I will just pay my share :)" Just say no, no one can force you to pay for something you havent actually had!

GraysAnalogy · 30/12/2014 21:40

thenightsky yeah i was terrible! usually I'm a bit mouthy and would have told them to sod off but I was so upset because it was my birthday. Luckily my two real friends took me up town and bought me some drinks (the champagne took all my money) and just made me have a really good night regardless - so they saved the night!

expatinscotland · 30/12/2014 21:43

So true, Bogey. I don't get it. If I don't have the money, I don't have it. 'I didn't drink/have a starter and dessert/whatever. I can't afford to split.' Problem solved.

I truly cannot afford to be a wet lettuce.

Pico2 · 30/12/2014 21:45

The only time that I offer to spilt the bill is either when we have had more or less the same or when I've had a cheaper option and not been drinking. I wouldn't dream of offering to split it to my advantage.

IsChippyMintonExDirectory · 30/12/2014 22:21

Just remembered another experience, although not family/friends.

DH and I were in Las Vegas having lunch in a burger bar. I was eating my meal when I felt a splodge of liquid on my foot. At first I thought I'd spilled something but when I looked down there was vomit on my foot and also on the floor. I somehow hadn't seen but DH told me a girl ran past, was sick right next to me then ran to the loo.

I have a serious vomit phobia so very nearly had a panic attack. The staff were excellent and ran straight over to clean it up and give me paper towels for my foot.

Vomit girl came out the loo, walked straight past the group of staff who were cleaning up her sick without so much as a glance and returned to her table saying loudly "that's what too much tequila does to you" to whoops and cheers from her moronic friends. I couldn't eat my food after that I was too put off, I'd only had 2 mouthfuls!

The manager came over and not only gave us our meals for free but also gave us vouchers for 2 free meals another time! We felt bad as it was a family run business and wasn't exactly their fault she was sick everywhere, but he said not to worry as, because of her attitude and lack of respect or apology, they were putting our meals on her bill Grin. We stuck around to see her face and it was priceless! He also asked her to apologise to us but she refused. Fab service though and we went back a few times after that.

borisgudanov · 31/12/2014 00:42

My father is Professor Knobbly Knob "The Knob" McKnob, who holds the Chair of Knobbliness at the University of Knobland, is a 6th Dan Grand Master black-belt knob, has written numbers papers and books on How to Be a Complete and Utter Knob, received the MBE for services to knobs, won the Nobel Prize for knobbliness, has won 5 olympic gold medals in knobbliness, has the Royal Charter for providing knobbery performances for the Royal Family, and gives demonstrations whenever possible. A mere catalogue of his achievements in the field of knobbery and knobology would fill some volumes. What follows is a mere example of his capabilities. OK, I maybe exaggerate a bit, but he really is the most offensive knob I know by a country mile.

We invited him to a DFIL birthday party at which numerous old friends of DFIL were present and it was a posh and sedate do full of polite and characterful people, many of them over 70. After dinner we had a performance of opera arias, because that is DFIL's thing. At the end of the (very good) performance there was the requisite applause, then the usual pause of silence whilst everyone rearranges themselves for conversation once more. In the middle of this silence (and still in earshot of the singers) Prof McKnob announced proudly:

"I THOUGHT THAT WAS SHITE".

After recovering I asked him WTF he thought he was doing so, having now got everyone's attention he declared:

"I SAID I THOUGHT THAT WAS SHITE. ABSOLUTE CRAP."

When I failed to speak for some seconds he thought he was being asked to elaborate (rather than apologise), so he did so. He explained how rotten the singers were, how inappropriate it was to do that kind of entertainment, how they should have sung what he considered real music, what nancy clothes they are wearing etc. etc. all at about 110 decibels.

Prof McKnob also celebrated the occasion with loud and irrelevant declarations in bad German, loudly demanding to be taken to his hotel RIGHT NOW (he had conveniently booked himself into a place 45 miles distant because it was cheaper - for him) notwithstanding that this would deprive a number of others including DW of their transport whilst he was chauffeured all round the countryside, critiqued the decor, company and DW dress, stated that it was not surprising the food was SHITE (it wasn't) because after all there was not a decent restaurant anywhere in our country (he lives in a different one, thank God), telling everyone that he hadn't brought me up to wear "posh suits" like the one I had on (no, sweatshirts covered in ketchup stains and baggy courdroys with holes in is his normal attire for formal functions), and topped it all off by starting a row with DFIL about politics and religion.

Prof McKnob never fails to give offence whenever he visits or is visited. You might as well invite Mr Blobby.

He is also an abusive bastard and the stingiest git in Christendom, but that is another story.

And then he complains that we avoid him like Chernobyl.

Twat.

IsChippyMintonExDirectory · 31/12/2014 07:20

Boris I think on your post alone this thread should be in classics. I just woke DH up laughing at it and he's on another floor entirely! And I kinda wet myself at You might as well invite Mr Blobby Grin

PedantMarina · 31/12/2014 07:38

Am aghast and agog that Prof McNob visits or is visited by anyone...

Darkandstormynight · 31/12/2014 07:42

We were not at a restaurant but at a relatives house for Dc's first Christmas, dc was less than a month old.
Cousin was trying to 'teach her Dd a lesson' and the 2 year old screamed absolutely bloody murder the whole meal while cousin ignored her. This little bitch (she really was) screamed so hard and loud she started vomiting . We swore the next year if they let her do that ever again we were getting up from table, leaving and never coming back!

MammaTJ · 31/12/2014 10:52

I truly believe that how a person treats waiting staff and shop assistants is a true measure of who they are!

A restaurant meal for a first date certainly sorts the wheat from the chaff!

musicalendorphins2 · 31/12/2014 11:05

Out for Chinese food one evening after a party. Someone from the party, whom we(gf & I) just met, was treating us all,(about 10 people) and he thought he was a big shot,strutting in, snapping his fingers at the waiter to come over. I was mortified. Waiter(who was the owner) came over alright, and told him off, luckily he didn't kick us all out.

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