To not want to share a bed with my mother?

[msfreud]

For context, I live in a different country from my mother and don't visit often. I'm 31 and she's 70. She's a widow.

Every time I visit her, she asks me to share a bed with her. I always say no. We were recently discussing the new flat she's moving into and she saidshe won't have a spare bed despite having a spare room. She said this was ok as I could share her bed when I visit. I said definitely not but she seems completely unable to see why I have an issue with sleeping in her bed with her.

I find it very intrusive when she asks me to and tbh quite disgusting. I don't know how she can not see any issue with it though.

It was bad enough sharing a room with my mother, the few times I had to - no way would I have shared a bed - there's always the floor. I have shared beds with friends though. Always with pjs on - I'm with those who say you only sleep naked with your partner, even if you're used to seeing parents with no clothes on.

What do you mean used you for her own comfort?

The only thing that matters is that the OP is not comfortable with it, whatever her reasons. And therefore she should not be pressursed into anything, no matter what her mum thinks.