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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Email Christmas Cards

23 replies

YellowTulips · 23/12/2014 20:47

A member of the family waits until the 23rd each year and then sends out an email to about 30 friends/family saying - Seasons Greetings, no card but will be sending a donation to X charity.

AIBU for this to get my goat? Frankly I think it's all a bit bloody lazy. They get all the lovely cards everyone sends to them each year and make and unspecified donation to a charity. Don't get me wrong - the donation aspect is ok (I have a standing order with a charity every month and change it every year ) I just think this way of doing it i.e. in lieu of cards is - well cheapskate and rude

OP posts:
simbacatlivesagain · 23/12/2014 20:50

YABU
Cards are really only for older people in my opinion. I am mid 40s and no-one I know sends cards anymore. We get the from older relatives. Years ago when all you had were phones and letters then cards had a place but with text, email, facetime etc they have no place in my view.

I would rather get an e card than a real one. The 15 odd real ones we have been sent are already in the recycling box. Open, read , bin. Waste of resources.

Sn00p4d · 23/12/2014 20:52

I don't send cards at all.
I freely admit I am both cheapskate and lazy with regard to Christmas cards. I find them utterly pointless and couldn't care less if I didn't receive any, all they do is clutter up my house then get chucked in the bin, what is the point in them. I don't find them "lovely" in the slightest.
Don't send them one in future if it bothers you, I'm sure they won't be devastated.

CrapBag · 23/12/2014 20:52

YANBU.

It's just lazy. Cards are cheap enough to not have to buy them just to donate to charity instead. You ca do both, they just can't be arsed.

I put it up there with the dreaded Facebook postings along the lines of "oh you know how crap I am, I haven't got cards but merry Christmas to everyone" no you just can't be bothered and blame it on being disorganised. Same with texts and Facebook messages for birthdays. Lazy and slightly rude.

I have issues with this sort of shit, mainly because I put thought and effort into other people but rarely get the same back.

Trooperslane · 23/12/2014 20:53

YABU. I'm donating to a vvv special cause (and personal to me and DH and DD) and my DM died this year so it's not exactly a fantastic celebration for us.

I can't write loads of 'merry Xmas, we're soooo excited' because we've had a shit shit shit year in loads of ways. It's been bittersweet though.

But you are still BU

Summerisle1 · 23/12/2014 20:53

I have a certain admiration for people who simply aren't prepared to buy into the relentless exchange of cards that simply get binned after Christmas. They are a waste of resources and I'd really be quite happy to see the back of them.

Original poster
YellowTulips · 23/12/2014 20:54

Just to be clear - it wasn't an e-card it it was just a plain text email.

Not sure if that makes a difference Smile

Maybe I should just give up and email them next year (and send everyone else lovely cards).Wink

OP posts:
KnackeredMerrily · 23/12/2014 20:55

Yanbu!

Lariflete · 23/12/2014 20:55

Cards aren't only for older people! I'm in my 30's and I love writing, sending AND receiving cards.
I also don't mind donations in lieu of cards but I'd rather not get a two-line e-mail at least get an e-card telling me they are donating instead which smacks of 'worthiness' and a bit patronising that they are doing that and you aren't. Even though I regularly donate to charity!

ThrowAChickenInTheAir · 23/12/2014 20:57

I disagree. Postage these days is expensive and cards are a faff. I think it's a pretty good solution. The only reason I still do cards is because many people I send them to don't use the Internet much.

I think this is likely to be the way most people will prefer to send 'cards' in years to come.

echt · 23/12/2014 20:58

I don't mind an email, as long as it's to me. Not happy about the list of names of others who've been remembered. Seriously considering not doing cards next year as its cost $120 to post this year.

Hatespiders · 23/12/2014 20:58

Gracious, we send cards and also donate to charity. You can get very reasonably-priced cards in boxes of 50 or more. And it's once a year for goodness' sake!
Obviously I'm hopelessly out of date sending cards. But here in Norfolk it's still very much the done thing. We have over 80 cards dangling about on strings around our bungalow, and every one warms our hearts.

Andrewofgg · 23/12/2014 20:58

They came in with the Prince Consort and I don't think they'll long outlive his great-great-granddaughter - or be missed.

I stopped sending them in whichever year it last happened that the UCW and RM between them were holding them to ransom - 2009? I thought Sod that and just send the money to the charity I used to buy them from.

Original poster
YellowTulips · 23/12/2014 20:58

I think that's sort of what irritates - the implication I don't contribute to charity when do (as per opening post) and also my cards are charity ones Smile

OP posts:
gunnsgirl · 23/12/2014 20:59

YABU

Do you send a card just to receive one back, which is the way it sounds? If so, isn't it all a bit pointless.

Your family member has the right not to send cards if he / she wishes. It's personal choice, as is a charity donation. Can't see what business it is of anyone else's really.

ThrowAChickenInTheAir · 23/12/2014 21:02

The part in the Email about sending a donation to charity would irk me. Doing it is great. Announcing that you are to everyone isn't really necessary.

Original poster
YellowTulips · 23/12/2014 21:09

No I don't "send to receive" as it were!

It's the semi "we are so great not sending cards and donating - but it's actually because we can't be bothered" aspect (or how I interpret it) that gets me tbh.

I'd be fine with an e-card also.

Happy to be told I'm wrong though hence the post! BTW am not as old as methuselah either and ironically work in IT Smile

OP posts:
Sn00p4d · 23/12/2014 21:11

Merry Christmas! Xmas Wink

Email Christmas Cards
Original poster
YellowTulips · 23/12/2014 21:12

Snoop like your sense of humour Grin

Merry Xmas to you also

YellowGrinchTulips

OP posts:
Andrewofgg · 23/12/2014 21:15

Personal advert in the Times one year:

Mr and Mrs Frank Muir will not be placing a personal advertisement in The Times this year. Instead they will be sending Christmas cards.

gunnsgirl · 23/12/2014 21:16

I've had family state they weren't going to send cards this year as the postage for all of them adds up too much, but would donate to charity instead.

I didn't see this as a blowing their own trumpet, aren't I good kind of thing but more a "Please don't think I'm being rude if I don't send a card." I didn't give it a seconds thought. Please can do whatever they wish. Not bothered in the slightest

SamCroClaus · 23/12/2014 21:28

yanbu
I think all this crowing about giving money to charity is shite.
I bet half of them don't.

Original poster
YellowTulips · 23/12/2014 22:03

Being cynical that's what I think - esp since relatives in question (v well off) bought me (for Xmas) nylon knickers with a garter belt attached size 12 when I was 8 years old Blush

That was one hell of a regift Grin

OP posts:
windchime · 23/12/2014 22:07

I love sending Christmas cards. If they are good enough for HM The Queen they are good enough for me!

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