AIBU to not want my husband to bake my son's birthday cake

[sandfish]

I like baking cakes and enjoy making special birthday cakes for my children. However, with my Son's birthday in 5 days time, I'm struggling with horrible morning (all day) sickness and can't bring myself to open the fridge to look for eggs most of the time let alone bake. I'd feel sad for my son if he didn't have a special cake for his party, so have found a recommended local cake making lady who might be able to make for me, for a fee naturally. Was about to book it, when mentioned the plan to my husband and he suddenly expressed a desire to bake the cake himself.

This would be all well and good if it were not for the fact that in the 20 years I have known him he has never baked a cake, nor shown any interest. I imagine I will need to end up standing over him trying not to be sick into the mixture. The result, even if edible, is not likely to be very exciting.

He is miffed with me and had gone out for a run in huff, because I suggested he was being cheap and not wanting to pay for it, and that he would need help with baking and I wasn't up to it. He is in a grump because apparently he thought it was a lovely gesture he had made, he wants to do it, and I 'think men are stupid and can't do anything'.

I'm peeved because he seems to think baking is so piss easy he can just knock out a fancy cake for son no bother, so clearly he doesn't value the efforts I put in to these things. And I think he just doesn't want to pay.

AIBU? Is he? Do I let him bake it and cack it right up just to prove a point? Or go ahead and order a cake anyway?

[Bogeyface]

I use the weighing eggs method. Good enough for the WI so good enough for me. Its good too because you can make as much mixture as you like without faffing about multiplying up the ingredients. 2 eggs makes enough for a standard sandwich, so you just add an egg for each extra layer you want.

[Mehitabel6]

If you are not well it seems sensible to let him. I expect he will be fine- maybe that is the problem! We used to have a novelty Christmas cake every year which my son used to do once he turned about 10 yrs. He had igloos, ski slopes and all sorts, so if he could do it I am sure an adult can!

[Mehitabel6]

Let him go ahead - you may well be impressed.

[40somethingwonderful]

Sorry but I think YABU

Let him make the cake, he might surprise you.

[Mehitabel6]

Men can't do right! They are accused of not doing enough to help and then when they offer they are dismissed as useless before they have even tried!

[SugarPlumTree]

Well done OP for remaining gracious in the face of people still going on at you.

There are some of us who are challenged on the cake making front and whose sponge cakes resemble flat biscuits. My DS has such a Mother and didn't know the pleasures of a home baked cake.

Then one day he decided he wanted and Xbox cake. Much male huddling in the kitchen ensued and expensive trips to Hobby craft for coloured icing. The result was a magnificent sponge covered with white icing and an impressive looking black x box controller with correct coloured buttons. Total result from DH and DS and I had never seen DH baking before then.

Hope the cake making goes well and you feel better OP.

[Athrawes]

Jeez. Let the man bake the cake and get off your precious high horse. It's baking a cake, following the instructions, not brain surgery. Seriously is this all you can do and so need to protect your territory?

[Cathycat]

If your son said the same thing in 10 years time (ie., I am going to try to bake a cake by myself for the first time) what would you say? Similarly if you tried to create something for the first time how would you like your husband to respond? I think it's great to develop new skills and other people's responses can be key in this.

[Branleuse]

its not hard to make cakes.

[Mehitabel6]

There are lots of books on it, YouTube clips etc- it is not difficult to just follow instructions.

[SanityClause]

There's no point in my typing this, because the posters it's for won't be reading it, anyway, but RTFT, PEOPLE!

[MonsoonAlan]

Sand fish you are marvellous. I would have felt the same as you in that situation. You have been gracious in the onslaught of Aibu and changed your mind.

Aibu is a damn scary place. Ignore the idiots who haven't read the rest of the thread before posting (athrawes for example...)

[WhenSheWasBadSheWasHorrid]

Aff at read the fucking thread

Hope the morning sickness isn't too bad today

[BestZebbie]

He should be given the chance to make a birthday cake if he wants to, if you usually do it - and a cake from Daddy will be better than one from a shop because Daddy made it especially, the gesture is even more meaningful if it is outside Daddy's usual comfort zone.
I agree that a basic sponge cake is not rocket science, but if he is worried (him! not you!) then there is always prepackaged cake mix....

[Psycobabble]

I don't get it. Let him bake it and help you out and do a nice thing for your dc so what if it's not perfect who cares

Men are actually quite capable human beings you know

[MokunMokun]

I can see in 5 years time when he's on the Great British Bake Off he'll be able to tell the story of his wife's morning sickness and his son's birthday and that's how it all got started.

Or it might be shit but it's only cake.

[JuxaSnogUndertheMistletoe]

MokunMokun ... it's only cake ??? It's only cake? How can you say such a thing? That's blasphemy, that is.

[BarbarianMum]

I'm quite good at cakes and always do the kids birthday cakes. One year an over ambitious attempt at an Octonauts submarine saw us running to Tesco. It wasn't the end of the world.