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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wish there were some other way of doing smears?

18 replies

CheerfulYank · 16/12/2014 07:16

I had one yesterday morning. Eurghhh, the speculum!

I know they're necessary and all but I loathe them. I feel there must be another way!

OP posts:
RokensWife · 16/12/2014 08:02

Me too - the term for it escapes me but my body goes into complete shut down mode when I have anything like that done. (My dr assures me it's a completely normal reaction and that her body does the same). Heart rate dips too low and I need oxygen. Fortunately my doctor insists on doing my smear herself so it tends to not be too problematic. My coil is due to be changed under general anaesthetic. X

DoesntLeftoverTurkeySoupDragOn · 16/12/2014 08:04

Unfortunately I think that, due to the way we are built, that's pretty much the only way to get clear access!

DoesntLeftoverTurkeySoupDragOn · 16/12/2014 08:05

I have to agree it's not my most favourite way to spend 10 minutes though. I tend to close my eyes and go to my happy place until it's done.

moggle · 16/12/2014 08:08

I have always hated them and a couple of times my muscles have tensed so much the nurse hasn't been able to get the speculum back out...
But this year I had ivf and the consultant did essentially the same process to put the embryo back in and it was amazing - no discomfort at all! Wonder if I can go back for the next smear!

bette06 · 16/12/2014 08:10

I wish I could go to a happy place while it's being done but the excruciating pain kind of keeps me in the present moment. Give me a thousand dentist appointments over one smear test any day!

Fluffyears · 16/12/2014 08:28

I have amazing practice nurse and despite tensing up badly in past she made it a breeze. She just kepy chatting about everyday things and told me how to breathe correctly.

NobodyLivesHere · 16/12/2014 08:29

It could be worse, I had a hysterectomy due to early stage cervical cancer, afterward I had to have what they call 'vault smears' which not only made me feel like I had Scrooge McDucks room full of money up my chuffed, but caused great excitement among the staff at my GP SURGERY as they don't ever get them apparently, so they all came for a look. Twas great having no less than 5 people taking it in turns to look up my hoohaa.

Bowlersarm · 16/12/2014 08:29

Agree. Everyone must surely agree with you.

JingleBellSniffer · 16/12/2014 11:17

It winds me up that I can't have one yet. By the time I'm allowed to have one, I will have been sexually active for 11 years. And on the pill for 12 years. I think it's very dangerous putting it off for that long.
Although I can think of a million better things to do, it upsets me that I and many other women have to wait a few years yet before we are even offered. We can't ask on the NHS at it won't be given.
but as i say, it does seem awful.

TwllBach · 16/12/2014 11:27

Move to Wales Jingle we can have them from 21 here!

I had my first one in 2012 because I kept putting them off and it was not a fun experience. During the same appointment, I had my ears syringed. I can say that the syringing was like a rather exciting walk in the park after the smear test.

Nancy66 · 16/12/2014 11:34

It really depends on who is doing it. Only when I had a nurse do one on me that was totally painless did I realise how many bad operators there are out there.

Original poster
CheerfulYank · 16/12/2014 11:37

Whaaaaat, Jingle?! You can't have one? Confused

I'm in the States and they are militant about them here. Used to be every year from 18 or when you were first sexually active, whichever came first.

Now if you're under a certain age it's every three years if your last one was normal. And you're given one at your first prenatal usually, which is what mine was.

My doctor is really good, I do have to say. She's done my last few and she's the only one who can do it without it ending in tears for me. Blush

Still though, ugh. It seems like there must be some...probe...or something they could use instead! (There are reasons I'm not a doctor :o)

OP posts:
Sidge · 16/12/2014 11:41

I do smears most days, and I have a theory that if men had smears they'd have invented a far better way of doing it Grin

Maybe like an airport scanner that you can just walk through?

They're working on a urine test for cervical screening which is interesting

CheeseBuster · 16/12/2014 11:42

Yes they are uncomfortable but please don't feel put off them, they are so important. I hope no one reading this concentrates on the horror stories- for the majority of ladies they are uncomfortable not excruciating. And I think we all agree 10 minutes being uncomfortable is better than dying of cervical cancer or it being discovered too late.

fassbendersmistress · 16/12/2014 11:49

I don't enjoy it but have always found it bearable. However, at my last one, as the nurse was finishing up she handed me a paper towel and said 'there you go, you've leaked a bit'. Looked down to big dribble of wee on the paper sheet thing....mortified!!! Won't stop me going back though. Necessary evil.

JingleBellSniffer · 16/12/2014 11:49

Nope, OP! 25 is the age here. There are girls dying of Cerival Cancer at 19 but are misdiagnosed because "it's so rare".

BurbGirl2013 · 16/12/2014 11:52

I have to have 2 a year!! & have a bended cervix so they have an extra long spec and have to poke and prod for AGES with me having to cough millions of times for them to get anything...Im in there for half an hour and am in agony afterwards BUT it's worth it ladies!!!!

Original poster
CheerfulYank · 16/12/2014 12:02

Oh agree Cheese, I didn't mean at all to scare people from going! It is necessary.

At ours they check for breast lumps too and discuss your current relationship a bit so it's a general health sort of thing.

Hi, Sidge! Xmas Smile Yes agree, an airport scan type thing would be most agreeable.

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