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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed when my clients are still in pjs when I turn up for work?

336 replies

missjenniferhoney · 14/12/2014 22:36

I'm a self employed domestic cleaner, have been for a number of years. I've recently taken on a few new clients (since Oct/Nov) and have been surprised to turn up to work at their homes to find them still in nightwear. It happened at 2 appointments last week, both at 9.30 in the morning. I turn up at the same time on the same day each week, so I'm not unexpected, and I always knock on the front door for them to let me in before using my own key as I think it is just polite. I honestly didn't know how to react, so just ignored it and got on with the cleaning after a quick 'Good morning, how are you?'

AIBU to wish they would get dressed before I arrive?

OP posts:
stitch10yearson · 15/12/2014 10:10

I think you are being unreasonable if they are wearing proper pyjamas, or a full dressing gown over whatever is underneath. If they are semi naked, then yes, you have a point.

I have employed cleaners in the past, and the ability to clean is only a small part of the job. The ability to ignore private stuff, to understand confidentiality, the ability to know that gossip is unprofessional, to be non judgemental, the ability to tolerate children with a smile, all those are almost more important than the ability to clean. If you find you can't do those things, then it doesn't matter how much of a sparkle you can create, you are in the wrong job.

FreudiansSlipper · 15/12/2014 10:10

I do think there is an element I am paying him/her so she should stfu

I occasionally see clients at home all are elderly and the reason I see them at home is that it is too difficult for them to attend outside office yet they manage to be washed and dressed

We seem to celebrate slobbish behaviour who can outdo each other

DustInTheWind · 15/12/2014 10:13

So what's stopping the OP complaining, or quitting?
Must be the money.
I used to work in a community school, and did home visits every 6 weeks, I've also tutored in pupils' homes. I'm there to do a specific job, and that's what I focused on. Not on the level of cleanliness, or how parents choose to dress.

OnlyLovers · 15/12/2014 10:18

YABU. It's none of your business and you've got a nerve to judge what someone wears in their own house. Do they pay you well? Do they provide all the products and equipment you need to do your job? Are they polite and respectful towards you? That's what matters.

I think that this shows how unimportant some people think that their cleaners are! is utter rubbish. They are at home and they can dress how they like. I employ a cleaner and am occasionally in PJs or slobwear when she comes. Guess what; I am still just as friendly and polite with her as if I've got 'proper' clothes on. Also, in the past when other people have been working in the house (builders, decorators etc), I've sometimes been in PJs then too. Do you think that means I found them 'unimportant' too?

ApocalypseNowt · 15/12/2014 10:20

It wouldn't bother me really.

Well, 'normal' pyjamas = fine.

Sexy lingerie and a come hither demeanour = inappropriate.

CupidStuntSurvivor · 15/12/2014 10:22

Freudian, being in PJs all day is slobbish? Surely what you actually mean that judging people on what they wear in the comfort of their own home is snobbish.

GoodKingQuintless · 15/12/2014 10:26

Well is being slobbish only acceptable in some segments of society then? Why can we not all be slobbish if we want to, and not be judged?

FreudiansSlipper · 15/12/2014 10:31

Having slept in you pj's and then sitting around all day in them yes I think is slobbish we all might have a lazy day but day after day yes i do think it is in what world is that seen as being a healthy attitude to have

But this is mn where doing the school run in pj's is seen as ok

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 15/12/2014 10:33

Eh? Who says the PJs have been slept in all night? I like to put clean ones on and then I work. From home.

cardibach · 15/12/2014 10:36

Freudian nothing the OP has said suggests these people stay in pjs 'day after day' -in fact she says that on previous visits they were dressed. There is also no indication the pjs were 'stinky' or that they were even the pjs worn at night...

Levismum · 15/12/2014 10:37

YANBU.

I totally agree with you op!

notsogoldenoldie · 15/12/2014 10:38

Well, I'd be mortified if I were at home in pjs with someone trying to work around the house. I apologise to the postie too, if I'm in my dressing gown answering the door. I think it IS about respect somehow; and imo there's a difference between relaxing at home and full-on slobbing. Or maybe it's a generational thing. I'm fairly ancient, so was brought up to wear Sunday Best, to be up and dressed at a respectable hour, weekday or not, and to have a "tidy" room in which to put visitors. I don't think there's anything wrong with that, as imho it shows consideration towards others, and a sense of pride in yourself and your surroundings.

CupidStuntSurvivor · 15/12/2014 10:39

I sleep naked Freudian...PJs are my house clothes. So no, I'm not wearing the same thing day-in, day-out.

Damnautocorrect · 15/12/2014 10:40

You'd love me, I have to put my hot water on and then wait for it to heat up, so if I'm waiting for a shower I probably still will be in Jim jams at 9.30/10.

FreudiansSlipper · 15/12/2014 10:44

It has been implied that have not yet dressed that is quite clear in the op

CupidStuntSurvivor · 15/12/2014 10:51

Well the OP isn't likely to have had opportunity to inspect what her employers have slept in. They could well have slept naked. And even if they didn't, it's 9:30.

Mintyy · 15/12/2014 10:54

I agree Didl. I completely underestimate the proportion of the population who are happy to stay in their night wear all day.

I am probably old fashioned, in that I like to get dressed. Even if I haven't had a shower yet, I will be washed and dressed by a reasonable hour. I seem to find it impossible to start my day without it.

Honestly, since joining Mumsnet, I had no idea people wore their pyjamas at home if they weren't going out. And now I find that some people wear their pyjamas even if they are going out! Doesn't seem to be a thing in my area, but I see plenty of threads on MN about it!

Chalalala · 15/12/2014 10:56

I work from home and I often don't get out of my PJs until lunchtime... I'll admit to feeling a slight twinge of shame when I have to deal with delivery people/plumbers/etc. But then I get over it, because I bloody love working in my PJs. Grin

HeeHiles · 15/12/2014 11:09

Or maybe it's a generational thing

I wonder how this thread would be on GransNet? There is definitely a change in attitudes over dress - remember when men always wore suits and hats? Women could never be seen in anything above the ankle!

Original poster
missjenniferhoney · 15/12/2014 11:09

Both managed to get dressed pretty quickly when they decided to go out so I suppose I did find it strange that they couldn't just throw some clothes on in the same manner 5 mins prior to me arriving. The situation left me feeling uncomfortable and if it becomes a regular thing I probably will say something. I shouldn't have to work in an environment where I feel like that so if they decided to let me go, or if I decided to move on I'd just offer the appointment to someone on my waiting list. I don't think I am being unreasonable but obviously many of you do.

OP posts:
Macloveswill · 15/12/2014 11:11

YABU I'm afraid

Anydrinkwilldo · 15/12/2014 11:13

YABU I'm still in my pj's now at ten past 11, as are the dc!

CupidStuntSurvivor · 15/12/2014 11:19

Do yourself a favour and just quit rather than saying anything. Frankly, you trying to dictate what they wear in their own home is likely to get you dismissed anyway. I honestly can't believe the gall of you...it's one think to discretely disagree with it but quite another to decide to actually say something. And when you quit, I'd give up domestic cleaning altogether.

OnlyLovers · 15/12/2014 11:20

if it becomes a regular thing I probably will say something.

Blimey. Good job you've got a healthy waiting list. If a cleaner or anyone working in my house called me out on something I was wearing at home they'd be out on their ear.

Chalalala · 15/12/2014 11:21

I would quit too rather than saying something, especially if you have a waiting list - mentioning it would just make things super awkward.

You're perfectly entitled to feel uncomfortable and to not want to work for them. You are not entitled to try to dictate what they wear in their own home. Imo.