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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed when my clients are still in pjs when I turn up for work?

336 replies

missjenniferhoney · 14/12/2014 22:36

I'm a self employed domestic cleaner, have been for a number of years. I've recently taken on a few new clients (since Oct/Nov) and have been surprised to turn up to work at their homes to find them still in nightwear. It happened at 2 appointments last week, both at 9.30 in the morning. I turn up at the same time on the same day each week, so I'm not unexpected, and I always knock on the front door for them to let me in before using my own key as I think it is just polite. I honestly didn't know how to react, so just ignored it and got on with the cleaning after a quick 'Good morning, how are you?'

AIBU to wish they would get dressed before I arrive?

OP posts:
HeeHiles · 15/12/2014 00:06

I would have to get dressed if I knew someone was coming, if I know a delivery is coming I'm up and dressed! I wouldn't judge anyone else though for what they answered the door in - unless it was a see through negligee!

CooCooCachoo · 15/12/2014 00:07

Are you my cleaner . I'm on mat leave and have a five month old teething baby, if I don't have to be anywhere pyjamas here can last way past 9.30!

Don't think ours minds though....

GoodKingQuintless · 15/12/2014 00:08

It is not an appointment, you are their domestic cleaner, you are in a way part of the household. You see their filth, and clean their loos, surely you can cope with a pj? They are comfortable around you ! You are neither the pope or the queen!

But I must say, if the queen or the pope ended up coming to my house habitually at 9.30 in the morning, weekly, they might one day catch me in my pjs.....

vinoandbrie · 15/12/2014 00:09

I don't expect the cleaner to think she's got an 'appointment' with me. She's here to clean, not to interact with or judge me.

I'd also be pretty annoyed if, having provided a key, the cleaner insisted on knocking, as I may be busy. Whether that's on a business call, or sleeping, or anything else I choose to do in my own home, is frankly none of her business.

Fortunately I have a fantastic cleaner!

Aeroflotgirl · 15/12/2014 00:11

Yabvvvvu they are in their own homes and are not walking about nude are they! 9.30 if your not going to work, is still fairly early. There çoukd be all shirts of reasons they are in thir PJs as highlighted on here.

GoodKingQuintless · 15/12/2014 00:11

Yes, good point. Why do you insist they stop what they are doing to come open the door for you? Why are you reluctant to use your key?

Ask them if they prefer you knock/Ring the bell, or just lock yourself in and get started!

PhaedraIsMyName · 15/12/2014 00:11

I really don't see what your problem is. The analogy with accountant etc is false. You are not having a meeting with them, you are there to clean the house.

Madamecastafiore · 15/12/2014 00:12

'Our previous appointments'

You see this is where your attitude is wrong. I don't have an appointment with my cleaner. She has an appointment with my vacuum cleaner maybe but most certainly not with me. In fact I am somewhat surplus to requirements.

Kellie1991 · 15/12/2014 00:15

I think YABU....its the persons own home and its not like they were naked !

i always used to get up and showered and dressed early every morning until i had ds and i work until late at night.
No matter who is coming to my house, friend, family or someone doing a delievery im usually in my pjs...hell we get up most mornings and showered and change into fresh pjs more comfy for relaxing in !

One morning the postman came to our house around 10am (was a new postman our usual one sees me in pjs most days lol) and dh answered the door with his dressing gown on and the postman said 'well for you at this time of the day when some of us have to work' I thought this was ridiculously rude especially since my oh works about 60 hours a week in 2 jobs one of them late at night and it was a saturday morning !

Zippidydoodah · 15/12/2014 00:16

Off topic but how come so many posters have referred to "a pj"? A pj? Wtf is a pj? Do you mean "a pair of pjs"?! Hmm

I must admit I am always up and dressed for deliveries etc; I haven't got a cleaner but if I did, I wouldn't open the door in pjs and would make sure windows were open to air the place before someone came in! I do want a cleaner (desperately) but am worried about allowing a stranger in regularly to clean my loos and stuff..... (Need to get over that I suppose!)

Mintyy · 15/12/2014 00:19

Funny isn't it? My cleaner has a key but I prefer her to ring the doorbell so that I can answer the door myself if I am in. You can't do right for doing wrong sometimes op.

Fuckmath · 15/12/2014 00:19

Yabu

YY to all the comments above saying you don't have an appointment with her but rather an appointment with the house. The householders can wear what they like and can be at home or out - either way it does not affect your ability to do the task you're paid for and tbh is not really your concern.

I would be a bit pissed off to be judged in my own home.

Redglitter · 15/12/2014 00:22

I've only ever had one appointment with my cleaner. The week before her first clean. She came over saw around my flat confirmed her prices and we discussed what I wanted done. I was all dressed and we had coffee and everything. It was so civilised. Then after that I gave her a set of keys, I pay her monthly in advance & she knows if my bedroom door is closed then I'm in bed. I keep out her way if I'm at home and let her work. I'm sure as hell not getting up to get dressed for her coming over.

I must ask her tomorrow if she finds me offensive Hmm

SomethingOnce · 15/12/2014 00:25

Would if help if you think of it as lounge wear?

ohdearitshappeningtome · 15/12/2014 00:30

They pay you to clean for them. Not for you to judge them in their own home.

They clearly comfortable with you. It's
Not reciprocated so why not leave them seeing it causes you so much pain to write a comment on a Internet forum

ohdearitshappeningtome · 15/12/2014 00:31

To add further ....

To be dressed at 0930 on a Sunday on that alone your unreasonable

perthmom · 15/12/2014 01:09

When both DH & I were working fulltime outside the home we had a cleaner. When I initially met with her to discuss cleaning requirements I was dressed as this was obviously a meeting. We would usually be at work when she came to clean, however on the odd occasion I had a day off or was at home sick, I would be in my (very modest) pajamas. I certainly did not intend this attire to be disrespectful towards her and she never appeared at all uncomfortable. She would get on with her work and would have a coffee break and chat with me. We became quite friendly and she never once mentioned my PJs.
When I left fulltime work to have the DCs, I then became a domestic cleaner myself. Most of my clients were at work themselves, however the ones that were at home were generally in pajamas. I have also encountered a couple of semi-naked DH's who were very apologetic. I wasn't embarrassed or offended as I feel it's just part and parcel of being employed in someone's home.

The only thing that DID offend me was the occasional client leaving an un-flushed toilet for me to clean (yuk).

Kaekae · 15/12/2014 01:17

I like to get dressed before people come in to my house but it would not bother me if my clients were in their PJs. They are in their own homes and you can't dictate what they wear. Hmm

TopazRocks · 15/12/2014 01:25

Actually, according to my female ancestral line, it should be 'suit of pyjamas'. Grin My mother would always correct us if we said 'pair of pyjamas' and it was her mother, who I barely knew, who was the true stickler. So there.

IMeanReally · 15/12/2014 01:47

I'd want you to knock and then let yourself in - sort of let me know you're coming in. When I've had carers with a key I preferred the ones who did that to the ones who just appeared next to me - then if I'm reading embarrassing threads on mumsnet looking at online banking or similar private info I can minimise it before they come in.

Riverland · 15/12/2014 01:57

Minty op says she is 'annoyed' by her employers clothing. What could possibly being annoying her except her own negative judgments?!

Pjs aren't inherently annoying. It's the judgey pants that creates the reaction of annoyance.

Op could have said how nice it is to work in such a relaxed environment that people are dressing for comfort rather than for show. But she didn't. She judged it to be wrong that people remain relaxedly dressed in her presence.

MrsBigginsPieShop · 15/12/2014 04:04

Sorry but you're their cleaner, not their lifestyle coach. They aren't there to host you and it's their house!

FinallyHere · 15/12/2014 04:14

P'raps in future, when you are agreeing terms for new contracts, you might mention what standard of clothing you expect, for anyone on the premises when you are cleaning.

I know that good cleaners are not easy to find, but good luck with that one. HTH.

DoYouWannaBuildaSnowman · 15/12/2014 05:16

I answered the door to the decorator in pjs and dressing gown on 2 weekdays last week, at about 9:30. The first day I was working 12-8. The second was my one day off for the week, I worked all weekend. I'm 34 weeks pregnant and went back to bed for a bit on both mornings.

Fortunately, it didn't seem to stop the decorator getting on with his job (downstairs!) nor did it seem to offend him. I've made sure I'm dressed for first meetings with people doing work in the house over the last few weeks, or if I need to be around for a proper conversation with them, but I really don't feel the need if I'm literally just letting someone in who already knows what they're doing and has been here before.

MammaMaja · 15/12/2014 07:13

YANBU. When you make your home someone's work place you should make sure they feel comfortable and respected. In my opinion this includes being dressed when they are scheduled to arrive, unless something else has been agreed when the appointment was made.