AIBU to air my views on my child's safety in school in front of 26 parents of children in the same class???

[Warriorqueen69]

Ok, my dd is year 6 and in the year 7 maths group in her primary school. She is a good girl in class - never had a bad word said about her by the staff.

The other day, her group was left to work unsupervised for a few minutes. Some of them ran around the room with rulers hitting other kids, others did silly dances. My dd asked around for a pencil sharpener from a couple of kids, as her pencil lead had broken and she wanted to be ready for the test on the teacher's return and her sharpener was missing from her pencil case.

My dd went to the door to look for her teacher to alert her to the bad behaviour that had ensured. The teacher entered and promptly gave the whole class a sanction, my dd included.
No big deal really, if a tad unfair.

Anyway, a while ago I'd started this year 6 site on FB for parents - a general info site, sharing of ideas, concerns etc - we have them in all the other years, so it was a good idea (I thought) to start something for our year.

I posted a post asking parents about how they felt about kids getting a sanction after being unsupervised for a time in class. I suggested I wasn't happy about this. (May I say now I am a secondary school teacher and I would not expect children under 15 to be able to comply with being silent in their seats in the absence of a member of staff). It was a bit of a grumble, nothing more and in the morning, i sought out the teacher concerned and had a real heart to heart.

Thing is, in the interim, someone felt it necessary to go and tell the teacher I had been unhappy with how things had transpired. So after we had sorted it out, she asked me not to post on FB.

Sorry, but I had posted in a very discrete group mentioning no names about a general situation. I reserve my right to free speech, especially where my child is concerned. I am pretty pissed off with the person who thought it appropriate to stir things up, something small and irritating, making it involve many people.

In short, this evening, I had TWO school dads laying into me: How DARE I disrespect the teacher by questioning her authority. One was almost threatening, suggesting that if I ever involved his daughter in anything in future, he would not "stand for it".

AIBU to expect the school to account for the times they leave my 10 year old unsupervised and then whack a blanket sanction on all the kids when the teacher returns regardless???? AIBU to expect threatening and horrible comments from fathers of my dd's peers when I question this policy of the schools?

You're a teacher? And you started an FB group, then posted something complaining about the decisions made by an individual teacher?! Are you kidding me?

I'm a teacher too. Very glad you aren't one of my parents. You sound charming

I think you sound overly invested in her schooling and like you have way too much time on your hands. FB groups?!

The class got told off and rightly, 10 year olds should be able to behave for a few minutes. Move on.

but its an institution, and that means its answerable to parents who entrust them with their kids.

But the OP was bitching about this on Facebook and not going direct to the school. The teacher can't be 'answerable' if she's not on the Facebook group to answer.

Shocking behaviour- especially if she is a teacher.

Going by your name, I'm assuming you see yourself as some sort of crusader, righting the wrongs of the teaching world.....I'd like to bet your dd's teachers see you only as a total pita. Heart to heart first thing in the morning??? Oh yeah, the teacher won't have anything important to do like getting ready for the days teaching, no, she is just there to listen to you and your self absorbed issues.

NoArmani

It was a discrete group.

It certainly transpires it wasn't a discreet group!

YABU and you sound like a PITA to be honest,
I would of thought , as a teacher you would have more sense than to start a Facebook rant about other teachers. It sounds like you think you are far more superior to anyone else.
And you obviously think your DD is far superior too, telling us she is in year 6 but year 7 for maths(was that relevant?!) and how she was looking out for the teacher to grass her friends up
Should teachers even have Facebook accounts? ( genuine question, I'm guessing it could be awkward?)

Teachers shouldn't really be leaving children alone in a classroom in primary school, even for a few minutes. TBFair, I don't know of any primary teacher who has ever done that but I guess it does happen. So you were YANBU to talk to her about it. However, YABVU to go on Facebook about it - no matter how generally.

Can you see it yet, OP? You've been rude, undermined the authority of another and have so far only see it as a misdemeanor when in fact, it is a tad more than that.

Yabvu and need to get a life!
Have you got nothing to fill your time with. I truly feel sorry for teachers putting up with crap like this.
Can 10yo children not be trusted to behave unsupervised for a bit?
I highly doubt your child was the only well behaved, innocent one.

The irony of the OP posting "I am pretty pissed off with the person who thought it appropriate to stir things up, something small and irritating, making it involve many people." is delicious.

Am not sure this is not a reverse. Can someone really be this obtuse?

Teachers were always popping out of the classroom for 5 minutes when I was a kid and that was back in the 80's so nothing new there.

Wrt FB when ds's school was particularly crap someone set up a FB page to air grievances- it was fab, they would ignore any messages you left at the office but quite a few parents had phone calls about what they had left on FB within about 5 mins of posting, they must've had a member of staff on permanent FB watch

I'm sorry, but going to tell the teacher about other children's bad behaviour (unless it was dangerous or bullying) is not on. A couple of minutes' ruler wielding? Pah. We all mucked about if the teacher went out of the room at secondary school - and that was at a top girls' grammar school. If the children are disruptive when the teacher is there, fair enough, but a bit of nonsense when their back is turned - fair game.

I don't think OP is a teacher. Surely teachers know the difference between 'discreet' and 'discrete'. And surely they expect 10 year olds to work unsupervised for a few minutes at a time. But I love the passive aggressiveness of her posts, so more, please!

CyclopsBee - I also love the part about the Year 6 daughter but in the Year 7 maths group.

damn wolfbasher you stole my line.
OP, stay in after school and write out 'discreet' a hundred times

You are extremely unreasonable. As a teacher you know you had a legitimate complaint and you know or should know what is the proper way to approach the school. Choosing instead to go to Facebook suggests to me that you were hoping to stir up other parents to really cause a problem. Alternatively you are too weak to assert yourself face to face so you did it from the safety of your laptop. Well done to the parents who challenged you.
Facebook is not an appropriate medium for school issues or indeed any issues regarding children to be discussed. I'm not on Facebook but I know from friends that some of the things that have been said on our school's Facebook page have been completely inappropriate. Our school has started to be proactive and sent letters to particular parents about what they say.

YABU, YABU, YABU you don't bitch about a teacher on social media without even talking to them first, and you do not comment on social media about the behaviour of other people's children

don't care about the other stuff - kids should be able to sit and work, they didn't this time... woo-hoo... they got punished. Group punishment sucks, would maybe talk to the teacher about that. standing at the door waiting to tell on everyone sucks too, I bet the teacher's heart sighed

The parents shouldn't have challenged you ime, that could turn into a really intimidating confrontation, they should've alerted the school if they had a problem with the way you handled things.

Don't people have real stuff to be upset by other than someone asking a question about how their kids are treated at school?

Did you want replies or not? Would it be considered 'real stuff' if everyone had said YANBU?

Don't bitch about people taking time to reply when you're the one who started the thread & asked the question.

And, get a life away from Facebook, that's where 12 year olds do their PA bitch statements, not adults.

Feel a bit mean adding to the flaming, but a whingey FB group for parents sounds BONKERS. Grow up!

OP thought the fb group was a discreet discrete group. It turned out to be an indiscreet discrete group. Therein lies the trouble.

People, there is no such thing as an fb group that is both discrete and discreet.

*easy way to tell which is which, especially important for teachers:
Discreet - the e's are huddled together, keeping things to themselves
Discrete - the e's are separated

Ozne

Thankyouverymuch dawndonna. I'm off now for my early meeting of PPA - pompous pedants anonymous.

Should teachers even have Facebook accounts? ( genuine question, I'm guessing it could be awkward?)

Of course a teacher can have a Facebook account. We have just as much right to a private life as anyone else. Whether you are a teacher, a parent, a doctor, a police officer, or just a human being, how you use a particular form of social media is what is important, and being able to use it responsibly is something that most adults are quite able to manage. Unfortunately, regardless of profession, there will always be some who can't manage to behave appropriately and that should be dealt with on a case by case basis.

I'm off now for my early meeting of PPA - pompous pedants anonymous.

Can I join? Surely you can't have a discrete group that's part of FB? Even the closed and secret groups are still part of FB.