to politely decline to use the disabled loo?

[MsIngaFewmarbles]

I was waiting in a long queue for the loo in a coffee chain and saw a lady with crutches head into the disabled toilet. She came out while I was still queueing. Another lady further back in the queue caught my eye and offered for me to go in first. I declined saying that I wasn't disabled so wasn't entitled to use it. She then countered away to her friends telling them that she was going to use it as 'it was the law' that if it wasn't being used you could use it. I couldn't face an argument so just ignored her. It's still bothering me that I should have said something to her and corrected her.

Thank you beyond I really appreciate your answer!

dawn dress it up however the hell you like. Saying "funny how the able bodied only care about equality when it does them a favour....." ( I'm paraphrasing sorry, I'm on the phone app) is a generalisation.

Oh yy baelish to a lower mirror! A rather petty moan in the scheme of things, but so many accessible toilets dont have mirrors in them at all!! Because no disabled person cares what they look like, do they!?

And (now designing some sort of toilet utopia!) baby changing facilities at wheelchair height are non-existent anywhere.

Oo, and how about some sort of cage to put my two year old in while i wee, to stop him pulling the emergency cord...?

beyond I've seen toilets with a fold down chair on the wall with straps to fasten your child in, would that do instead?

Instead of just a lower mirror have a low down, but tall mirror. Some of them are at wheelchair height, which is fine for wc users, but useless for anyone else unless they can stoop down - my grandmother (who has a number of mobility related conditions) cannot and likes to check her lippy.

Separate parent and child loos are an excellent idea as they stop idiot pram users clogging up the accessible loos.

Just here to point out that some of those "idiot pram users" will also need the accessible loo. If you see someone with a buggy come out of an accessible loo, it's not wise to assume they were in there just because it was big enough for the buggy.

HouseBaelish - yes please to a long mirror that suits both those standing and in a wheelchair. I'm usually in a wheelchair, but sometimes I leave it outside if I'm feeling up to taking a few steps in and don't have the energy for the hassle it is to get it in, and then it's pretty painful to bend down. Although any mirror at all is a bonus, as often they're missing.

I would also very much say separate toilets would be better. Larger toilers with grab rails would suit lots of people, however the size you need to get an electric wheelchair in, to be able to close the door and manoeuvre around without tripping over it, and having a turning circle to get back out again is often under-estimated. Plus it does help when you're desperate.

I went to London today. First time in years as I'm mostly housebound, but I had lots of help and new painkillers, so thought I'd give it ago! I spent half the time hunting for an accessible toilet. By the time I got there I was bursting, and would have not been impressed with anyone just doing the 'only be a minute' dance who wasn't disabled. (I do have issues with needing to go quickly, but not all the time, just thought I'd give another perspective that sometimes accessible toilets don't exist at all, or are miles away so they're pretty valued).

I was already pretty depressed at the fact that all the places I used to go (Covent Garden), markets etc are now about 90% inaccessible to me. But having all the toilets I could find being located by stairs only was a cherry on top.

Also - for people with mobility issues, standing is usually ranging anywhere between mildly painful to want to rip my hair out and sob into it in agony, so not having to stand and wait unnecessarily (and yes, a disabled person using it is a necessary wait, a non-disabled isn't.)

I have a radar key that I bought on ebay. Before anyone shouts at me the consultant who set my broken ankle advised me to buy one on ebay because of the length of time it would take for an official one to come through. I couldn't wait for that long because I was going on holiday the next week, we also bought a wheelchair on ebay. (great holiday that was)

It was kept in the glove box of the car and transferred automatically when each car was replaced without much thought, obviously it hadn't been used for years.

Until last summer. We were on holiday in Sussex/Kent and driving around a remote part of the coast. I needed a wee so we were looking for loos or an open pub as we went. We finally found some but the ladies and gents were locked because of a flood. The accessible loo was accessed from outside and the was no notice to say it was also closed, so out came the key. That, to me, is the only kind of emergency in which a non-disabled person should use an accessible loo.

I have used accessible loos very occasionally at other times (without the key) because I have recurring cystitis. I think that's fine and only happens when wet pants are almost inevitable. Only 3 or 4 times in 10 years.

Everyone needs to be considerate of the needs of other people. At busy theatres/concerts I've organised or taken part in a female "raid" on the gents, with other females guarding the doors to warn men we are in there. That's much better than "nipping" into the accessible loo. And quite a laugh.

Daily Mail Article

www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2841450/Just-live-1m-house-doesn-t-mean-m-not-breadline-Ursula-knows-ll-little-sympathy-says-trying-match-parents-comfortable-lifestyle-left-penury.html

Basically a lady who has a large house and on the surface a luxury lifestyle but won't be able to give her children the life she had as a child.

I know I shouldn't sympathise but I do know how she feels and have been feeling it a bit myself recently. We have a nice house (although not as nice as hers!) etc but we'll never be able to afford the type of lifestyle my parents had and the lifestyle I guess we expected to have when I was a teenager/early 20's.

I think the message always was to work hard etc and you could have it all but now a larger house, private school, comfortable retirement all seem to be getting further out of reach. I know there are people worse off but a high salary doesn't get you that far now as house prices just keep jumping up as do school fees and it feels like we work hard just to stand still.

I wondered if anyone else felt the same?

Good point by glitter about the standing - reminds me that recently i popped into a motorway services for a wee sans chair as it was under the suitcases. Hobbled along with my stick in huge pain to find there was already a young boy no comment about him not needing it, i dont know he didnt. Well except that it was specifically a ladies accessible toilet... in there while his mum waited outside. So hmm, how about a fold down chair on the wall outside for if someone with reduced mobility did have to wait?

The onus is on people to explain why they need an accessible loo if their condition is invisible? Feck that. So one previous poster should announce to the whole line that they have a colostomy bag regardless of how they feel about doing so in case someone thinks they are being impolite? How very English!

With a colostomy bag, is it that the extra room is needed or that the sink is in the same room? Or both?

Would it be beneficial (i know the mooncup users would be grateful!) to have sinks in every cubicle? As we are building toilet utopia now!

'The onus is on people to explain why they need an accessible loo if their condition is invisible? Feck that.'

Exactly this ^ . I have an invisible condition. I'm 28 and look healthy and fit, but I still have need for a radar key and occasional use of the accessibile toilet. I'm not explaining myself every time I do. Can't we all just learn not to fucking judge on appearances?!

no one should ever have to explain.
perhaps if temp non disabled did not use them, people with non visible conditions would not get greif.

I much prefer washbasins in the cubicle (I am visually impaired) - it saves me time as I can look at it while I'm sitting on the loo and figure out where everything is (taps/soap etc.) and saves me from being buffeted around by impatient people while I'm trying to do that at the communal ones.

I'm with Sock. Dd2 is 18 and has EDS, it causes all sorts of urinary and bowel problems, from IBS and cystitis type symptoms to prolapse, she also has AS. Why should she be put into the situation whereby she is required to explain herself?

Point taken, ArcheryAnnie, but let's face it, 99% of parents with prams using the accessible loos are only using them to prevent their £8

Argh, £800 quid pram being nicked, that should say.

Not that I've ever heard of anyone stealing a pram, or a baby, from a loo.

Perhaps public loos should also have a rail outside for people to lock their prams to! I solved the issue by having an incredibly beaten-up grubby looking beast that no-one in their right mind would want :)

I have the bugaboo donkey duo and my local asda is in a very bad area known for theft.

I genuinely don't know what I'd do in this situation as it's almost guaranteed to go if I left it unattended.

At the moment I take it in because baby change is also in the accessible loo and I just use it at the same time. But that is probably bad as I'm clogging it up longer than I need to.

Better facilities really are needed.

Bernice just cos you've never heard of a baby being stolen from a loo doesn't mean it won't happen,

I've played out in fields with my siblings and never heard of a child being snatched and murdered, yet it happened didn't it?

I never thought I'd hear of a toddler being snatched from a shopping mall by 10 year old boys and murdered, but again that happened didn't it?!

Didn't think a child would be snatched from their holiday villa in Portugal, and again do I need to finish this sentence?

Ask the Bolgers, Paynes and McCann's if just because some ones never heard of something happening means it can't and wont happen. Because I think you'll find they disagree with you! Because that's the implication of your not that I've ever heard of it happening!

Is it a suprise then that parents would want to take prams and buggies in to toilets rather than outside closed locked doors where yes you can see the wheels but not the child it's self?!

Yes. Playing far away is the same as being just outside door.

And (now designing some sort of toilet utopia!) baby changing facilities at wheelchair height are non-existent anywhere.

Beyond, my number 1 toilets have height adjustable changing table, so can be used by wheelchair user ( but there is probably 1 of these in a 100 mile radius!)

Re: buggies fitting in toilets, I left door open so that I could see them. Or took babies in with me, not ideal, but they would have screamed the place down being left outside with door closed.

Er how long does it take to lift a child out of a pram? Seconds?
Now try pulling your pants up unlocking often a fiddly lock, when your in a panic your child might have been taken! Takes more than seconds doesn't it?! There's often no cctv near toilets! And if you don't realise your child's gone it could be minutes before you come out of the cubicle. By which time your child could be in a car and miles away.

Jamie Bolger wasn't playing far away he was in the shopping mall with his mother, the other two I'll give you there were no parents, but then that's why parents are so sensitive about keeping their DC's close!

Lift child.out and take it into cubicle then